So I know someone that was into the drugs, gangs, and all the "good stuff". he has a gf and a kid. So he finally got thrown in jail, a year and a half later... He came out, now he's this changed person, he watches cartoons with his kid, takes him to the park, helps his grandma with housework, and cooks for his gf. He doesn't like to party anymore, he doesn't hang out with his "gansta" friends anymore or people that are into that way of living.
Now, I suppose that I'm the only person that doesn't do all that stuff that he knows (drugs, alchohol, crime, etc). So he keeps calling me... all the time. he wants to visit or hang out and I'm busy with college like all the time. calls me almost every day and several time during the weekend, but I never talk to him or answer the phone.
Whats with this guy? I think it's great he's changed but dammit... I'm busy, I have college and money to worry about. what am I supposed to do?
2007-10-04 12:11:20 · 6 answers · asked by Mr M 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It can be just as simple as getting him involved with some of the activities you do. We all need social support, and what more with him who is undergoing such radical changes in life. He needs help, and is actively looking for it. He never knew how to lead the life he now envisioned, and is taking you as a role model. How many times in life do you think you have the chance and power to help change a person's life for the better? Try to help him, if not find some support group for him. It will not take much of your time, but it will make the whole lot difference for him. But hurry pick up the call, or you might lose this change to help him.
2007-10-04 12:26:10 · answer #1 · answered by Zephyr 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he is just trying very hard to distance himself from his problem. I think maybe you should take him to where a lot of people hang out, and let him talk with some people. He needs to find new friends, but he doesn't seem to know how to go about doing that. There is one other thing you could do, and it might not be an option to you but I'll say it anyway.
If you get any free tickets to anything and you don't want to go, give them to him! If it's something that he would enjoy or a social type of thing, just give them to him. Even if he doesn't use them, you at least made the effort to help preoccupy him.
Good luck!
2007-10-04 20:13:17 · answer #2 · answered by Zach 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like great improvements for this man. It's great that he got rid of his old "friends" and turning to someone who is a positive influence.
I would encourage you to introduce him to some of your other friends and hang out so he is around other people that are positive like you. Also you may want to consider getting involved with some community activity and invite him along.
Things should get easier if he is able to balance out his time among other people and not rely on you all the time. Sometimes it takes a little bit of nudging on our end to help individuals go out and explore the world a little bit!
If you are not up to it, you need to find a way to tell him what you need and want out of this friendship. It's not fair to either of you to leave him hanging and wondering what's going on with one positive friendship he seems to have.
2007-10-04 19:17:39 · answer #3 · answered by Erica, AKA Stretch 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have some human compassion for someone who is trying to change his life around. Get him involved in Narcotics Anonymous and then he will have a support system. Your life isn't going anywhere fast if you don't have the time for another human being.
2007-10-04 19:15:54 · answer #4 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well its good that he has changed but just tell himt he truth that you are very busy rite now.if he is your true friend he will understand. maybe jail really did change him for the better and maybe he appreciates his friends(you) a lot more than before and maybe he thinks that your a good influence on his life now.
2007-10-04 19:34:12 · answer #5 · answered by crazigrl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to find some friends. Maybe steer him towards a religious group. How are you involved? Why does he call you?
2007-10-04 19:18:38 · answer #6 · answered by m k 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋