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Things You Learn From Video Games





1. There is no problem that cannot be overcome by violence.


2. You can overcome most adversaries simply by having enough quarters.


3. If it moves, KILL IT!


4. Piloting any vehicle is simple and requires no training.


5. One lone "good guy" can defeat an indeterminate number of "bad guys."
A. "Bad guys" move in predictable patterns.
B. Except for "bosses," most "bad guys" can be dispatched with one hit.
C. You often fare better against a large mob of "bad guys" then
against a "boss" in one on one combat.


6. "Bosses" always hire henchmen weaker then they are to do their 'muscle work'.


7. If you see food lying on the ground, eat it.


8. You can smash things and get away with it.
A. Smashing things doesn't hurt.
B. Many nice things are hidden inside other things.


9. Cybernetics are our friends.


10. When driving, you can knock other vehicles off the road and get away with it.




11. If someone dies, they disappear.


12. Money is frequently found lying on the streets.


13. All shopkeepers carry high-tech weaponry.


14. If you get mad enough, you can fight even better than normal.


15. If it's on the ground, you should get it.


16. Repulsive, ugly, cannabalistic, evil beings have just as much
right to be loved as heroic fighters.


17. The operation of a weapon is a simple and obvious procedure.


18. You never run out of ammunition, just grenades.


19. No matter how long you fight, you can always fight again.


20. Death is reversible (but only for you!)


21. Ninjas are common, and fight in public frequently.


22. Whenever huge fat evil men are about to die, they begin flashing
red or yellow.


23. When you are born, you drop out of the sky (a stork?) and are
completely invincible for a short time.


24. Although the enemy always has more aircraft than you, they fly in
elaborate patterns which make it easier for you to shoot them all down.


25. All martial (marital?) arts women wear revealing clothes and have
great bodies.


26. All martial arts men have rippling muscles and angry expressions.


27. The enemy always leaves weapons or powerups lying around for no
reason other than so their bitter enemy can pick them up and
defeat them with it.


28. Shoot everything. If it blows up or dies, it was evil. If it
doesn't, try and pick it up--- it was probably a powerup or bonus.


29. Carpe diem! You only live three times!


30. The most powerful fighters always wait until you have acheived a
near-impossible, flawless win record and/or killed a certain
number of opponents before they appear in your presence and beat
the crap out of you.


31. You sustain injury if you shoot innocents.


32. A hundred-to-one odds against you is NOT a problem.


33. Gang members frequently all look the same, and often have the same names.


34. When racing vehicles, do not worry if your vehicle crashes and
explodes. A new vehicle will appear in its place.

2007-10-04 09:05:18 · 12 answers · asked by pheonix140180 3 in Entertainment & Music Jokes & Riddles

12 answers

LOL!! That's awesome! Thanks for giving me a good laugh.

2007-10-04 09:11:34 · answer #1 · answered by k8thegr8 2 · 3 1

Corrdination, reaction timing, quick decisions, $hit talking like "i focking uberpwned your @ss" throw controller at the wall, paying money, wasting money, learned how to download full pc games because EA is a piece of $hit company that rips you off ie ex: new game = $60 bucks and comes with a booklet of 2 pages. WTF?!?! Learned how to hate EA, Learned where EA headquarters is located, Learned how to build C4 (kidding) hehe.

2016-04-07 04:07:47 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Yeah and to think we have all these young children who play video games like this and think it's fine to do these things in real life! Hopefully, most of them will have a great deal of common sense just like we did!

2007-10-04 09:23:31 · answer #3 · answered by Oh, it's like that? 7 · 0 0

Holy sh*t! When you stop to think about it, this sounds like our strategic plan for handling the situation over in Iraq. This may be actual proof that the entire Bush administration spends lots of time sitting around smoking weed, drinking cheap beer, eating cheetohs (or pretzels) and playing video games.

2007-10-04 09:12:03 · answer #4 · answered by badkitty1969 7 · 0 2

Another medal for excellence, Phoenix.

2007-10-04 10:47:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

another lot of seemingly useless information
but OH! so true too

some of these games amaze me
but how you get them all is the most amazing thing

thanks

2007-10-05 08:12:29 · answer #6 · answered by itsa o 6 · 0 0

OMG, they were as good as you are, Pheonix. A star for you.

2007-10-05 01:17:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Some of those were cute. But asking for a star wasn't.

2007-10-04 09:08:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 4

i love these little lists you make

2007-10-04 09:13:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

ha ha ha funny

2007-10-06 02:37:21 · answer #10 · answered by Luck dragon 7 · 0 0

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