my parents hate me?

Question

Im really really stupid I make mistakes alll the time,my brother is perfect he is at uni,whenever I make mistake like dropping my contacts the hit me and tell me I stupid and Im useless,whenever I do anything good they take no notice I try not to be so stupid but I cant help it and Im starting to hate myself for it and Im to scared to tell them anything what should I do?

Answer 1

Your parents love you till no end and one day you will look back and know that you thought this way just because your young and your brain is trying to sort things out and it gets lost some times so your mind thinks that way. You are so loved by your Mom and Dad and everyone. I promise that is the case. By the way your not stupid at all your just young.

Answer 2

Honey, I think you have it backwards....your parents are the stupid ones. You are not stupid. They have made you feel that you are. Dropping contacts deserves a slap? Lord, if that is the case I should be beating the hell out of my three boys!! Your brother is NOT perfect, no one is. I bet if you talked to him you would find out that he has a lot of issues and concerns that you had no idea that he had. Everyone is unique and everyone has the right to be who they are. Don't let your parents treat you like that. THink about it......they are too stupid to be decent parents. Look at all of the things they are doing wrong. Would you raise your children the way they are knowing how it feels? I doubt it. So who is wrong here and who is the stupid one? You make silly mistakes...who doesn't!?!?! I walk in a room to do something and can't remember what I went in there for. I drop crap all of the time, I suck big time at math, I couldn't tell you one thing about politics (except that Bush is an ***), but I excell at other things and I am sure you do also. Have faith in yourself. Look at all your good qualities. Write your parents a long letter telling them everything you are feeling and how they are treating you. Let them know how it is damaging your self esteem. It will make you feel better and they will finally know. If they don't respond or care then just ignore them completely and find other things to do rather than be around them. Good luck

Answer 3

You are NOT STUPID! You are young, & you make mistakes. Every young person does, & your parents made mistakes when they were young too.
Even today your parents are making one of the biggest mistakes of their entire lives, & that is to allow you to go around thinking that you are stupid. Another big mistake they are making is by doing things that cause you to believe that they favour your OLDER brother.

I know it's going to take a lot of courage on your part to talk to them about this, but it's the only way you are going to get to the truth.

I think that the truth is, that they love you, and care about you very much. If they are calling you stupid directly to your face, then they are absolutely positively WRONG to put it in those exact words. It may be what they are saying, but I'll bet they mean to say something else, but are making very bad choices in the words they are using. If you talk to them and use words that describe how you feel when they say the things they say, then they will learn how to communicate with you in a better, & more positive way.

If you are still afraid to talk to them, I suggest that you start by showing them your question, & let them read this answer, & any of the other supportive answers you get in response to your question.

Be Brave! :-)

Answer 4

Ok, I know everyone is saying talk to your teachers, report it to the police but here are my thoughts as a parent.

EVERY parent has the right to discipline their child. Spankings were the norm when I was growing up and I always said I would never hit my child but low and behold when I had a child, guess what? He gets spankings. I think after a certain age they will become ineffective and I probably will find other means of getting through to him once he turns 10 or 12.

That being said I do NOT think it's okay to BEAT Your child for losing their contacts. I don't agree with calling children stupid or useless. I think lowering your child's self esteem is one of the worst things you can do. I have NEVER said anything like that to my child.

BBUUUUTTTTT..... before you go telling everyone how horribly your parents treat you think long and hard about the concequences. Are they really treating you terrible? Do you think the way they treat you may be against the law, or is it just 'unfair'?

because once you start something with guidance counselors and police officers and teachers it is going to blow up and you may get put in foster care if you aren't careful or worse. you WONT be put in foster care and your parents will be livid with you and treat you worse......

just think about it. Is it normal teen angst or not?

Answer 5

This is a hard situation. Did you know that you can see a counselor at school, and they won't tell your parents (unless you're being abused.... but being hit every so often--without leaving marks--isn't considered reportable abuse; not that it's not bad).

In some states you don't even need your parents permission to see a counselor. I would really ask to speak to the school social worker or psychologist. Starting to hate yourself is very awful, it will lead to depression, which you might have already, then you won't be able to cope or compete with your peers for a good job you like and all that.

It sounds very bad, yes, but since you're getting older you can use resources outside your home to move past it, just like an adult would. Give it a try. I'm rooting for you. :-)

Answer 6

Aw sweetie first you need to stop calling yourself stupid. Your parents are obviously having some issues out of your control. I suggest you look into what your school has to offer in the way of peer counselling or maybe go speak to your guidance counsellor. If you are not sure if you want to "tell on your parents," just go to sort out your own emotional stress. Your counsellor should be able to recognise where the true issues are as long as you are open & honest with them. Unfortunately a licence & classes are required to drive a car but any one can have a child. It is possible that your parents need as much help coping as you do. Maybe its them who doesn't know what to do. Good luck to you & I wish you the inner strength you will need to survive this.

Answer 7

You need to sit and talk to your parents and tell them how you feel. Im sure they dont mean to be like this. There is no book telling people how to become good parent or how to have good parenting skills. Most brothers and sisters feel the same as they are growing up. You must explain to your parents this is knocking your confidence of talking to them. If this is more serious and you are beaten regularly talk to one of your teachers that you trust at school they will advise you and help you.
You are not stupid and dont let anyone tell you that. you say you are clumsy we all do clumsy things from time to time but you will become more clumsy with nerves if you are being hit.
Im sure they do not realise how you feel talk to them and hopefully it will resolve the matter

Answer 8

The hardships one face during adolescence are daunting indeed. You are not really ,really stupid nor are you remotely stupid, you're a 13 year old girl growing up and trying to figure out your world. Yes I agree many of the things your parents do are not going to help better you, you must not let them smother you. You are intelligent and you are able and willing to change your life that my dear is a sign of someone not only who is intelligent but also determined. You do your best and the best for yourself, if they don't take notice of your accomplishments then that is their own fault, stand on your own to feet but also even though they might not have been the best parents respect them as your parents...good luck

Answer 9

your not stupid hold your head up high and know that only you can define who you are I dont think they hate you I think they are a bit out of line I would never intentionally hurt my kids and may say things like your acting stupid but I know they know I m goofing around with them tell your parents how they make you feel make them own there responsibilitys to you as there child if you get a negative reaction from them maybe you should go talk to a school councelor or a teacher or other parent you trust maybe someone else can make them see what they are doing is wrong love yourself and dont let them bring you down beign clumsy occasionally does not make you dumb treating your children like dirt does tho so know in this your not the stupid ones they are

Answer 10

friend, first of, your parents should NOT hit you for ANY reason. doesn't matter if you killed someone or if you dropped your contacts. they have no right to hit you. even if they're your parents, NO hitting. you should talk to them and tell them what you think, otherwise they're just gonna keep doing the same thing... and you should NOT hate yourself, once you hate yourself, you're gonna fall into a freaking depression, (that's if you're already not in one...) and it's gonna get to a point where you won't care what they do anymore. you need to talk to them, just go up to them and say why do you always hit me and say i'm useless? see what's their answer and then take it from there.... hope all goes well for you friend...