Some children always seem to be asking for something . How important is it for the parent to say no sometimes?

Answer 1

Its not parents that have to say no sometimes,its grandparents too!
I recently overheard a granny say to 4/5 year old in a toy dept,
'oh dear won't mummy buy you a Bratz doll,don't worry nanny will buy it for you'..
Not only spoiling the child,but undermining the parent too !

Answer 2

Children require and need (and actually want) a parent who has rules... and a schedule...

If you can't afford something a child wants, saying "no" isn't going to be emotionally crippling. If their friend has an item, but your child doesn't, well, he's going to have to get over it...

If your child wants to do something, but it conflicts with your schedule, then say "no". You don't have to stop everything because your child wants something all of the time.

My kids didn't get even 1/2 of everything they wanted... why? because i could afford it sometimes, and other times, i figured they didn't need whatever it was. Kids get too many "things" and they get bored and it's a waste.

My granddaughter has so many toys it's rediculous -- her "other grandparents" buy her something every time they go to the store -- a new toy, and this is a weekly event, and some weeks she gets new things 3-4 times... it's like christmas constantly. She's spoiled rotten. On her mother's birthday we were in the store, and her mother was picking out some things she liked and wanted for her birthday. My granddaughter started asking for toys and CRYING because her mother was getting things and she wasn't? the child is eight years old.... a little sad, i think.

There is a line between spoiling and doing nice things for out kids. Do what you can, and do what you feel is practical.

and take care!!

Answer 3

i have 2 kids ages 11 and 9 and my son, the 9 year old is ALWAYS asking for something - its not always big but its so annoying! He starts with the big stuff, he knows not to ask for stupid toys but he will go with a huge pokemon deck then widdle down to a small pack or a pack of gum. Its crazy, i say no but i feel like thats all I'm saying. Sometimes i say yes when it comes down to a pack of gum or soda or something when we are at the store. I think he knows that and that's why he starts big - anyway, it is important to say no but sometimes its nice to say yes. My motto as a parent and wife is "pick my battles" i do it with my kids and my husband. Not everything is worth fighting over.
Another way i solve this is by having my son bring his own money with him to the store - most of the time if he is the one spending the money he worked hard to get he will decide its not that important and leave it at the store.

Answer 4

It is important not to give them everything they ask for, and for them to understand that there are good reasons why you can't have everything.

However, I also think that it's important to be consistent about this. My rule is to be reasonable about it. I never say no just because I feel like saying no or because I said yes last time or because I've had a bad day and they've just wound me up too much.

If I'm out with my daughter and she sees a magazine she fancies I don't see the problem in buying it for her if I've got the money on me to pay for it.

The times I will say no to something are when we genuinely can't afford it, it's dangerous or it's impractical. For instance if my son wants a PC game that's classed as 18 and full of gorey violence, or my daughter desperately wants to fly to america to visit a friend, or my son wants a dog when we haven't the time to spend on it. But there always has to be a good reason, and I make sure I explain what that is.

Saying no just for the sake of it or to prove a point, just gives confusing signals to a child.

Answer 5

I think it is very important that children learn the value of things and it has to be taught young because the older they get the more expensive the things they want become.
Also at some point everyone is told no and have to learn to deal with it. If someone never heard no, then how are they going to deal with it later on? The children that haven't heard the word No and don't know the value of things are the same ones that disrespect people, demand things, expect things to be given or handed to them, have no respect for law or authorities etc...,

Answer 6

If the children keep asking for something, and you immediately give what they want, you are already raising spoil brats.
There's a need to say "NO" sometimes to what they're asking you, and explain to them why this time they can't get what they want. If they need anything, they must work for it. Example, one child wants you to buy a toy car. Well if you have an extra budget, and because it's his first time to ask for it, so maybe you can buy him but need to explain to him that he must take care of it and value what he has because there will be NO next time. In that manner, the child will be aware that in every thing that he ask and possess, there's a responsibility on it. At least at an early age, you taught him how to be responsible, which on his young mind can perceive.

Answer 7

I think that allowing a child to grow up without learning how to cope with being told "no" (coping with disappointment), is cruel. Learning that we can't always get what we want, right when we want it, is a very valuable lesson.

This doesn't mean that kids should never get what they ask for, only that they understand the difference between 'yes' and 'no'.

I've noticed a couple of things, being around kids for many years, about kids who constantly ask for things. Many of them ask for things because they simply crave attention. These kids will do anything to get an adult to pay attention to them, even if it's being yelled at. I've also noticed that some kids have their parents, or even other adults, well trained. These kids know that if they are persistent enough, they can change a 'no' to a 'yes'.

A little attention when kids are behaving well, along with meaning no when you say no (consistency) works wonders.

Answer 8

It is very important for parents to say NO just as equally they say YES. The reason being if you keep giving in you will end up with spoilt and very demanding children and a pile of challenging behaviours to follow through the years. It also teaches children that we cant have everything we want and to hopefully value and treasure what they do have and receive.

Answer 9

Children are always wanting something. But we as parents have to teach them that they don't always get what they want.
As a parent myself I hardly ever buy my children something just because they want it, that isn't sending a very good message. What I do instead is let them earn what ever it is they want. If they are little then cleaning their room all week will allow them to earn something they want.
I don't spoil my children unless it's their b-day or Christmas. To do so will cause them to have no appreciation for things in life. My kids know if they really want something they will ask me how they can earn it. This way they really appreciate it and it teaches them responsibility at the same time. Good Luck with yours.

Answer 10

it's very important...no child should be given everything they ask for...or they will expect this all though life..and life is not that simple....some times u are told no and thats it.
my mother gave in all the time to my youngest sister and she was always a terror to live with..and still is..even though now she is 20.
every child should be told no..but parents should also give valid reason as to why they say no...this way the child understands why they cant have or do something at this time