My stutter is making me lonely and depressed. What should I do?

Question

Hi, I'm 20, and currently in my third year of university. Basically, I developed a stuttering problem in 9th grade, which led me to become withdrawn and antisocial. It didn't help too, that I had a history of friends abandoning me prior to that as well. I tried to socialize with people, which led some of them to laugh at my stutter or give me weird looks. These days, I don't really have any friends except for a few online, but they seem too busy to talk. And my lonliness...is tearing me apart because I love to socialize and walking around campus is painful because I notice people laughing and having fun w/o me. I can't confide in my parents for they'll assume it to be excuses, and the anti-depressants I took several years ago helped alot, but we really can't afford to keep paying for them. I thought about suicide before, but there's this inner strength i guess, that tells me that eventually, things will be okay. I don't know what to do now, and any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Answer 1

Go to a public library and get "Self Therapy for the Stutterer" published by The Stuttering Foundation of America or get your own copy from their estore for a few dollars. That is the book that several of my uncles and cousins who stuttered worked through to achieve fluency. Look at the people who stutter who have overcome it and gone on to do great things with their lives at the top of www.stutteringhelp.org. God has great plans for you. You stuttering may be keeping you away from some people who would influence your life in a bad way. Concentrate on your studies and the future that He has in store for you.

Answer 2

Hi! My daughter stutters and so does my neice. Try to slow down a bit or talk quieter. You are singleing yourself out because of your embarrassment. You can sit and watch others having fun, or you can join in. You are not a freak or an outcast because you have problems with speech. I can assure you that you are not the only one. Stop beating yourself up so much! You did the right thing by further educating yourself, and for what? To not move on with your career because you don't want others to know you stutter? No way! Whether you stutter or not, you are a person with feelings just like anyone else. You have needs and expectations! Get out there and stop thinking about it! Or at least try! You can live like this if you want to, but obviously you don't or you wouldn't be on here! You are lonly because you are sheltering yourself from friends and fun!

Try to work on slowing down and think about what you will say before you actually say it. That may help! I have faith in you! I give you much credit for attending college, I didn't have enough inner strength or love for myself to do that! So you already proved you are stronger than I am! You are luckier than others who are bed ridden or paralized or people who can't read or speak at all! You could have said you weren't going to college because of your stuttering, but you pushed yourself to do what's best! Great job! I wish you the best in whatever you do! :)

Answer 3

Let me say it will get better. I think some of the problem with people and why they make fun is because they are uncomfortable being around someone that they feel has something different about them. I have a brother in law that stutters excessively and it is hard to listen to him and not be aggravated around him because you want to finish his sentences. BUT he has a great job and friends and does well despite his stutter. Maybe you could see a counselor about your stutter. Maybe a counselor at school. Sometimes when you are depressed and nervous or upset it can make the stutter worse. You say you took antidepressants before maybe you should look into government help for your medical needs. Good Luck and things will be better.

Answer 4

For years now I periodically stutter and I can't get my words out. I understand to some extent how you therefore feel. As I said this with me is periodic and is part of the symptoms of a mood disorder. I talk so fast at times the words just won't come out and I stutter. The only thing that I know about stuttering help is that there is a singer in Britain who won our Pop Idol show a few years back called Gareth Gates and he was so bad he just could not speak at all. Fine when singing but speaking, no. Then he was on a documentary and he could speak like there was nothing wrong with him. In fact while I watched I was wishing he would shut up as he never stopped talking! Anyway, the reason for his ability to speak for the first time since a child he attributed to a program for stutterers that he undertook called the McGuire program. There is one in America I got the address off the British one if you wish to look into that. I know nothing of stuttering or this program I merely passing on what a bad stutter claims helped him. I hope it is what he claimed.
http://www.mcguireprogramme.com/ Main site
http://www.mcguireprogram.com American site

Answer 5

You are taking your stutter too much to heart...Most people don't care that you stutter and will accept it as the norm for you. If you stopped worrying about your stutter and not be so touchy you might make more friends and be a lot happier. Allow people to laugh with you and stop thinking people are laughing at you. Forget the anti-depressants and just be yourself.

Answer 6

I wish I was there... I would be yor friend! : )
You sound like a GREAT person... : )
You mentioned that you have thought about suicide.....??? : (
Please think about THIS for a moment:
Right now, all over the world, there are children dying of AIDS, children with empty bellies, starving to death, children who pick out of a garbage can for scraps of food.... children being physically and sexually ABUSED by someone they trust... : ( There are children who are deformed and handicapped... and children who will NEVER have all of the wonderful opportunities in life that YOU, my dear friend, have been given! : )

I don't mean to "preach" but I just wanted to put YOUR problem [stuttering] into perpective for you! : ) : )
: )
You have a good family, and ALL the opportunities in the world BEFORE you NOW: you are well-educated and have ALL of your needs fulfilled --- EXCEPT for one thing: you stutter. Unfortunately, the stress and pressure you put on YOURSELF is only causing your stuttering problem to get worse..: ( Try to RELAX about it --- and try to worry less.

The people who LAUGH at you are NOT people you would want as your friends... True friends will accept you for the person you are --- stutter and all!~ :)
Ignore those ignorant people who make fun and HOLD your head HIGH! You are smarter than they are! : )

Regarding your parents... try ONCE more to talk to them... start the conversation out this way: "Before I begin, I just want you both to LISTEN to me and let me FINISH what I have to say, without interruption..." Maybe they will HEAR you this time, and not criticize... : )

IF they do not, seek out your counselor/advisor at college... OR maybe one of your favorit teachers... : ) There must be at LEAST one person you can talk to...? A favorite professor or..?

Finally, go to the infirmary at your college and see if you can be places back on anti-depressants again -- Explain your situation [just like you did in your question above] and perhaps they will help you find a way to afford them again. : )

One more thing.... check out these sites, below...
They will also help you:
http://ezinearticles.com/?Tips-To-Help-Cure-A-Stuttering-Problem&id=392995

http://www.stutteringcontrol.com/

http://www.fluentspeech.com/

http://www.medhelp.org/forums/mentalhealth/messages/30066.html

http://www.d.umn.edu/~cspiller/stutteringpage/effects.htm

: ) If you need someone to "talk" to --- here is my email address: : )
[e-mail]

: ) Don't give up!!! : )
I wish you all the best!!! : )
Nicole : )

Answer 7

Talk to a counselor at the university, and ask for help. Or if the university has a health center, ask there. There may be a speech therapist on campus, or in the area. This problem can be treated, but YOU have to take steps to seek out the help. Good luck!

Answer 8

Try deliberately slowing your speech, or putting some marbles in your mouth. Call 1800 992 9392 or 1800 221 2483 (USA) See http://www.stuttering.org/bsrp.html and http://www.uncommonknowledge.com and http://www.slc.sevier.org (.org/comdis.html) and http://www.casafuturatech.com/books/ (books/NoMiracleCures/index.shtml and http://www.perfect-voice.com and http://www.hanoverspeech.com Call 1540 265 5650 Depression and loneliness are addressed at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris on pages 2, and 9. All I got!