"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame.
Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams.
If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." ~ Jack Handy
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the Hell happened to your bra and panties.
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"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " ~Frank Sinatra
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
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"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~ Henny Youngman
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
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"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not." ~ Stephen Wright
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
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"When we drink, we get drunk.
When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!"
~ Brian O'Rourke
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
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"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." ~ Benjamin Franklin
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like your dad.
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"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." ~ Dave Barry
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
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To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can! ~ Dave Howell
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
2007-10-03 22:01:23 · 23 answers · asked by Grotty Bodkin is not dead!!! 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
nice one, u made me think and made me laugh at the same time. Brilliant mind you have, hahahaha, cant stop laughing. Really this is a great one...
2007-10-03 22:13:13 · answer #1 · answered by Marge 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Warning: The consumption of this joke may make you laugh your bum off and piss your pants, because you know it's true!
LOL, a star for you!
Cheers!
2007-10-03 22:06:43 · answer #2 · answered by Mrs. Victorious 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My favourite
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the Hell happened to your bra and panties.
PMSL!!!!
oh how true!!!!!!!!! LOL LOL LOL!!!!!
2007-10-04 00:41:49 · answer #3 · answered by *XxXEmmaXxX* 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Cheers!
2007-10-04 04:07:23 · answer #4 · answered by Kitty Katty 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm just popping out for a bottle of wine.lol
2007-10-04 07:19:05 · answer #5 · answered by jenny flower 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Excellent-thanks hehe!!xx
2007-10-03 23:35:45 · answer #6 · answered by SUZANNE R 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They are great I'm definitely going to print them off, so funny star for you.
2007-10-04 12:32:46 · answer #7 · answered by Bezza 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are inebriated by the verbosity of your own enthusiasm.
Thanks for the laffs lol
2007-10-04 02:04:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
WARNING: I've thought all them warnings but you've given me a reason to ignore them all , them poor workers!! lol
2007-10-03 22:37:14 · answer #9 · answered by Wide Awake 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
LOL Priceless!
2007-10-04 05:21:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋