Over the years, it got significantly worse. He is a veteran and the condemnation of men in society, and fathers and everything else has gotten him very angry. He talks in circles, it used to be when bad things happened in society, he could point them out and say how things should be. Now, even when good things happen, like a wedding, or a new birth, he finds recents or past news to contradict the good event. He wraps his logic around all of the injustices done to people even if he does not know them. The scary part is, he is making total sense, and me and his family can't even be around him without being brought down. He used to work, but quit work after 6 months since people are "so lazy and talk all day about stupid stuff" or "women sit there all day and talk about men and when he talks about them, he is the bad guy" Now, he is on disability, and is deteriorating fast. He is battling skin cancer, and his prognosis is 50/50. He has really slipped into his own world. What to do?
2007-10-03 15:46:45 · 5 answers · asked by ? 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
He does not even know us really anymore, and he has no feeling about it. When relatives pass on, get pregnant, or married, or whatever, he had zero interest-or will say "I don't know those people, they were never around the last 20 years" and when we say "well they have their own lives" he either hangs up, or says "yeah right, so why are you telling me this?"
2007-10-03 15:50:33 · update #1
The fact is, he is very aware of current events, and his past is part of it, but the present and how screwed up things are in society can't be ignored. He completely hates women, total mistrust, and won't even look at them or speak with them except very minimal-laughs if they are divorced, got a flat tire, or whatever. He supports men, helps them get visitation, custody, and helps unravel the injustice. He has been successful, but is bitter.
2007-10-03 15:55:15 · update #2
PS: we know he has major depression which is why he gets disability and medication. He does not trust the therapist at all if she is female or as he says an emasculated male.
2007-10-03 15:56:47 · update #3
One more thing, he actually cheers when he hears a women has killed her spouse or kids and says "women are totally going nuts" when a man does it he says "she probably threatened him or abused him" I must say, I have heard women use this logic against men, maybe he is making sense.
2007-10-03 15:58:35 · update #4
Misery loves company as the saying goes.He is still hurting about his failed marriage it sounds like and his illness is taking a toll on him too. Don't let him get to you, try to say positive things when you are around him.If he comes back with a negative you come back with a positive. I hope his children come around before he passes, if they are old enough to do so with out the so called Mother to interfere.He is right about the world of the work people women especially are cruel until you turn it around back on to them, even though I am a woman I can tell you we are very cruel creatures when we want to be .Just remember when you are around him try your best to be positive as possible. Good luck
2007-10-03 16:46:22 · answer #1 · answered by Super Mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get as many friends and family members together, and stage an intervention. He needs to get some serious help A.S.A.P. Some time working with a skilled, male, therapist would do him some good.
God bless!
EDIT: It sounds like he may be suffering from a major depression.
2007-10-03 15:52:49 · answer #2 · answered by Mel W 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The story you tell matches me to a tee. The difference is that about 16 years ago, I just let the anger go. Your brother needs to let it go. If you look for negative things that is what you are going to find. I'll be praying for you and your brother. God bless.
2007-10-03 15:52:59 · answer #3 · answered by Jason 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its sad that he chose to remain in the past and remain angry. He created his reality around negativity....and it delivered over and over. Perhaps some therapy for him and the family - or just the family if he refuses to go. Sometimes we just have to walk away.....
2007-10-03 15:52:28 · answer #4 · answered by that judi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy has more psychological problems than just depression, i'm afraid.
Sometimes we have to accept people at face value... and your brother has problems... accept them and be as supportive as you can.... but don't baby him.
I'm sorry he's ill... people don't understand mental illness, and i sure hope your family doesn't turn their backs on your brother because of it.
take care.
2007-10-03 16:30:20 · answer #5 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋