Day care or not day care?

Question

I've got a dilemma and I'm not sure which way to go, so I'd like to hear some advice from people who've been there.
I hate my job. Hate it. The only benefit is that I work 3 12 hour shifts, and my Mom works 4 10 hour shifts. We've been able to work opposite of each other (we're at the same location, different jobs) so my son doesn't have to go to day care.
Two different positions have come up at my hospital. The pay is roughly the same that I'm making now, only these jobs are both 5 8 hour shifts, no weekends, no holidays, on occasion an evening shift (no nights), mostly days. The problem with that would be that I'd have to either find a babysitter or put my son in day care.
So do I stick it out in a job I hate with convenient hours? Or try something different but put my child in day care 4 days a week (mom would have him the other day while I'm at work)?

My son is 10 months old, and so far, very spoiled. He's used to being held a lot. He's very social with adults, but he's only seen other babies in passing, like in the grocery store. None of my friends have kids close to his age.

The pay rate is basically the same, but I'd be working 8 hours more each pay period, so I'd actually be bringing home more.
Thanks everyone so far for the advice. I'm still so torn. Working midnights every other month and not being there to sleep with him is killing me, but the thought of putting him in day care is kinda scary to me too. We have an on-site day care, but it's verrrry $$$. There's a day care at a church down the street that looks promising, IF I decide to go that route. I still don't know. Keep the answers comin!!!

Answer 1

I felt the same way. I didnt know what to do with my son.
My son has been in daycare since he was 8 weeks old. I think it's good for kids to be in a day care setting. He's socialized, and as they are older, it makes for good company for the child.
They do tend to get sick, because of being around the other kids, but that could cause for less illness when they are older. (helps the immune system)
It's a personal choice. I think it's a great idea for daycare.
Amen to those women who can afford to stay home and be a Stay at home mom. Boy, do i wish i had that chance!

Answer 2

If I were you, and in that situation...I would say that's a hard question. Day care pros are that he has SOOOO much needed interaction with children his own age. In along with that goes for a decently sick child with all of the germs looming around and winter coming especially. BUT.....for your benefit, there sounds like with the new position that you would be on a more regular schedule than you are now. I don't know. Talk with your mom about it....see what she would do. How long do you have to accept or turn this offer down? That is another thing you need to take into account. That's such a hard dilemma...it would be hard for me to choose, but I would probably say to take the weekly promotion. Just because you will be on a more regular schedule with NO weekends or Holidays AND the daycare for him would give him good interaction and he wouldn't have to go but 4 days a week. Find out if you can give it a try and see what happens and see if you don't like it, if you can change back to your old schedule. Good luck! You'll make the right decision.

Answer 3

I have 5 children,with the oldest(now 20) I had him in day care for about 2 years until my second child was born.Not wanting to put her in at just a few weeks old,I left my job and was a stay at home mom,and remained that way for 10 years,they are only little for such a short amount of time,then you kind of give them to the world with school and friends.When they are babies they should be at home.Also I'm a nurse,I worked 12 hour shifts forever!!Then went to 8 hour shifts it sucks!!!!You will so miss having off 4 days a week,I promise you.

Answer 4

You know what? I was in this same position after my baby was born. We have absolutely no one to help with our daughter. My family lives a few hours away and the father's family just don't care. I could find a job I loved and send my baby girl to day care. (First of all, I don't like the thought of her not being able to talk. What if someone is mean to her or handles her too rough. How would I know? A lot of places have cameras but it still happens. Not trying to scare you at all just giving my opinion!) Or I could go to the job I quit prior to my pregnancy because I hated it so much and they would give up oppostie schedules (he works there too). I am working the job I hated so much and loving every second of it. Because I know where my baby is, who is taking care of her, that she is being loved and played with and has all of the attention that she needs and deserves. Personally I would rather her be with someone who can give her all of that rather than with someone who is just there for a paycheck. I know plenty of moms have no other choice but if you do, I wouldn't choose daycare. They don't love your baby. You and your mother do? This is how I thought of it would I rather me be happy or my baby be happy. I'll tell you what she is the happiest 8 month old in this world and I'm happy with the decision I made. As far as I'm concerned, it was a small, if any, sacrifice to make sure she can be happy. Good luck to you and feel free to email me anytime. I hope this helped.

Answer 5

Depends on how old your son is. I've worked in daycares for many years and I don't advise putting a baby in daycare because they don't get the attention they need. If your child can talk then he could learn some important social skills by being in a daycare. If your son is still little I would get a babysitter or keep the job you have for now.

Answer 6

Stick it out until your son starts school. Here is why... you are working more shifts with about the same pay...daycare is pretty expensive so essentially your income will be less. Also, you can trust your mom to properly take care of your son. You know that if something goes wrong, she will put him first and make sure he is safe. There is no guarantee that a daycare provider will do that for your child. I am NOT saying the ALL daycare providers are that way, but if you have 3 kids that don't belong to you and one that does...which one are you going to save first?

Answer 7

Well sorry to break it to you but whether its in an in home daycare or daycare center kids still bite each other. That is not the ladies fault. I have worked in both and see how the 2 arent very different from each other other than the number of kids. Yes she would more than likely have had more 1 on 1 in the in home. But you did what you had to do. I would not have approved of taking your child in a van or any vehicle for that matter unless you have signed a form stating that it was ok. If you did not do that then no she should not have taken them anywhere. She can loose her lisence for that.

Answer 8

I had trouble with my child with the same thing and when i finally decided to put her in daycare she was a spoiled angel she could not handle the change full time so i put her in day care only 2 days a week to start with and then i went and changed jobs as she got used to being in day care. but daycare turned out to be a good thing for her when it came time for her to start pre-k this yr. i just worked her gradually to gettting used to the idea o fbeing away from me.

Answer 9

I have heard crazy stories of some day care centers...when the sitter can't stand a baby crying no more so she throws him in the coldest bath...also when the kids are older to eat solids and just get fed corn dogs (fast food) all day because the sitter is too lazy to cook...
I would definitely sacrifice myself for my baby, as long as your baby is well taken care of
.....but also if you have friends with kids who know of Great day cares and are sure baby's get the attention they need then you should go for it....but do your research!!!!!!!!!!
I didn't mean to scare you!!!

Answer 10

Can a guy and girl just be friends?