Please HELP SAVE me!!!?

Question

I can't take this anymore. I've never experienced ant freedom in my life. I've never been allowed to go out with my friends and now my mother is being a total...she doen't even allow me to do anything and says that I'm evil whenever I do not do as she says or my sister says.She hates me and recently she flipped coz I did my eyebrows but I'm tired of being the weird one out. I'm 16 but I'm crying everyday.I just want to run away from home but I have nowhere to go. I hve contemplated suicide but I'm not that stupid and I won't do it.Please DO NOT ask me to TALK TO MY PARENTS because I have tried, countless times and have only been turned away. I can't take this anymore. I cry because of the smallest things. And right now,my mom is cursing me and saying that I'll never succeed in life only because I wanted to use the computer to post this. Please help me.I have reached my limit and I can't go on.

Answer 1

OMG!!!! i went through the same thing, & the only reason why my mom ever treated me like that was because i did a lot of stuff, but that wouldn't have happened if she would've let me go out & be with my friends. look da only way you can divorce your parents its if they beat you & you have proof trust me i've been there before. & that will just make things worse. the only advice i can give you as i went through the same thing is Just hang in there i know it seems hard i know you want to run away i did & only makes things worse just go get a job so you will b less home, stay in school do very,very good in school since education is all we have. save up your money & when you turn 18 move out. that's what i plan to do. i mean im not perfect & i know they care but i dont think they see how much they hurt me by overprotecting me. the only thing you can do it's just stay quiet when she talks like that to you. get a job save up do good in school turn 18 & get the **** out of there. good luck i just posted a problem up i hope u will be able to answer question =] hang in there

Answer 2

Do you have a father figure in your life? If so, what are his feelings about this? If he is with your mother on it, then it sounds like you have messed up parents. Is your sister older? If she is, then there's probably something she did that your mom didn't like, and your mom overreacted and decided to control your life so you wouldn't have the chance to make stupid choices.
Maybe one thing that could decide if you should leave or not is if you bring up your contemplation of suicide to her. If she responds in a negative way, such as saying "well then just do it" then you need to get out of there now. It doesn't really matter where, because no one needs to be in that type of situation.

If you have a friend's, go there. If you have a relative's who is nearby, then go there. If you have neither of those options, you can go to a center (every city has one). Or you could even call child services on her. You would need evidence though, so you'd have to record her cursing you out or something. Just find some place to go, or else what she says will start getting into your head. Trust me. If you need someone to talk to, you always have your friends or anyone on here who offers it. Most of the people on this site are willing to help if they can, and if you need to utilize it, don't be afraid to.

Answer 3

Your mom is a child abuser saying you wont succeed in life thats wrong, shes sick not you. She will never change they never do cause shes happy being that way. She gets what she needs from you and gets high on it. Abusers enjoy doing that. They feed on your reaction. Tell her "you need help "with a straight face. Dont argue or explain anything when he says bad things. If you try to defend yourself with words shes already got you cornered. There is no explanation needed when youre dealing with an abuser. There are ways to leave home and live somewhere else. You just need to make up your mind to leave home then ask people at school make phone calls and eventually you can leave home and live elsewhere. Words can make you sick the rest of your life get away while there is still time.

Answer 4

Hi hon.

i had a father who always put me down, too.. he assured me i would never amount to anything and was cruel. So i DO understand.

currently, i'm a 50 year old woman -- i suffered post traumatic stress disorder for much of my life on account of my childhood and the way it affected me... and i hope this does not happen to you. through therapy and the support of others, i have finally come to terms with my life.

i think that one thing you could do is talk to the school counsellor. you could also consider going to a foster home, talking to social services. PLEASE address your issues with the school counselor.

I have put up a couple sources below.. the first one is kids health org and there is a lot of advice for teens on any number of subjects. i was hoping you could find some good information here. it looks like a good site.

the second link poses a question about abuse, with a pretty good answer. maybe you can use some of the advice there?

i sure do feel for your situation, hon. and i'm so very sorry.

i would also like to say one more thing -- your mother has psychological problems... anyone who treats another person the way she treats you, really needs some help. but she won't get any, i'm sure. it is NOT YOUR FAULT that your mother is cruel, mean and says awful things to you.

your mother is also suffering in some way -- maybe she was abused growing up, too? abuse is a cycle, and it seems to go from generation to generation until someone breaks the cycle.

please don't blame yourself... sending hugs.

Answer 5

Hey it will be ok, I don't know why your mom is being a control freak all of the sudden, I'm not sure what to say as far as changing the way your mother feels but realize that you are as strong as you want to be, I mean don't let someone's opnion of you dictate who you are, you don't have to use that as an arguing point but things are a little easier when you realize what people think of you really doesn't matter...my mom used to tell me all the time I'd become a drunk like my dad but I'm not, it took me a while to think she probably told me either to vent anger towards my father or she was afraid I'd take after him, I thought about suicide too and cut myself which isn't a good practice and if you are doing that screaming in a pillow is a good alternative, well best of luck

Answer 6

Try to talk to a counselor (Not a guidance one!) at school. They can at least help you by being there to talk to. As a counselor, they cannot repeat what you say (Unless they feel you are being abused, then they have to report it) so you can feel safe in talking to them and say what you want.

My husband was in the same situation you are in when he was young (Except he was also physically abused by his guardian), He decided there was nothing he could do until he was out of High School so he decided he would get away as much as possible. The best way to to this was to do "Permissible" things. He studied constantly, went to the library often and made straight As (So she could not say he was not studying at the library, if she thought he was not studying it meant beatings). He also got a job and saved every penny he could (She made him pay rent so he could not save it all). As soon as he graduated he had enough money to move out. He also had a great GPA so he was eligible for lots of college scholarships which paid his way through college with NO loans! (His guardian OBVIOUSLY was not going to send him!). He graduated and became a successful attorney. The women lived in a crappy home til she died and everyone who did not escape from her, did not do anything with their lives. They are all minimum wage workers, it is not their fault unless you think that they could have done what he did.

I know the suggestion is not much fun but it is better than being around a lot and being verbally made fun of. Plus when you get out of the house and go to college, you can live in the Dorm (AWAY from her!) and have lots of fun even while getting good grades!!! :)

Do not give up your individuality though, it is what makes you special! I would refrain from getting any tattoos that are visible. Mainly because what you think is cool now, you may not like later! Plus gravity works and if you get fatter and/or droopier the picture may change! :)

The other reason is that all people judge by outward appearances and it will serve as a disadvantage in the business world. It shouldn't, but it does (Unless you go to work at Hard Rock!)

So try this if it suits you. May not be what you really wanted to do, but it will make time more bearable until you graduate from High School. Make sure you graduate otherwise you will really limit yourself. Many art jobs today require college educations so you need that education in many creative jobs as well!!!!

Good Luck and remember you can always use a computer at the library (School or Public Library) plus reading books is a great way to escape from a crappy situation.

Good Luck, High School is a rough time of life but it gets better!

Answer 7

If you are still in school, please make a point to go see your school psychologist. Talk to him/her. I don't know why your mother would say such nasty stuff to you. If at all possible, ignore your parents and do what makes you happy because it seems that your parents are not happy with you, and why try to please them. That is wasted energy and is making you very sad. Forget them and move on with YOU. If they don't like it... tough **** on them. Suicide is not going to make your parents feel guilty and you'll be dead so it wont help you in anyway. I have 2 young kids and no matter what my kids become, I would never ever make them feel like they are useless. Love is unconditional. Maybe your parents need to go see a psychologist and work on their issues. I hope you get through this. Good luck.

Answer 8

You have a counciler at school, it's time to go talk to them, and tell them how you are feeling. If that doesn't help then it is time to call your mental health program in your area and tell them you need help. There are free programs out there if your parents won't help you. If you are that distraught you need to talk to someone, and soon. Make sure that you really need help, or are you being a teen ager that is being rebellious and a drama queen?

Answer 9

I will assume that you are attending school and as such, have access to school counselors. My suggestion is that you see your school counselor and tell them what is going on and get some therapy to help you get through these last few years at home. The teens are some of the toughest years to get through and those of us that have gone through them NEVER want to go back.

Get some help outside the home.

Answer 10

I say take all your problems to God. Parents will let you down and so will friends so if you're having a problem pray about it because suicide is not the answer.Suicide wont get rid of the hurt and pain that you are feeling trust me i know from experience and once you die there is no coming back. Try talking to God because thats wat helped me.