How do I drop the hint I dont need expensive E ring?

Question

My bf and I have discussed marriage and know we both want it asap. I know from a trusted source that he was planning on proposing at Xmas but isn’t now as he cant afford to buy me a ring. I am not supposed to know this as he apparently wants it to be a surprise but I am not supposed to know anything about this, a mutual friend let it slip to me as she knows how much I wanted it and thought he never would. Anyway the thing is I don’t need a ring that costs alot its what it symbolises that’s whats important to me. I wouldn’t care less if he only spent a tenner on it or got it out of a lucky bag. We are going to give eachother a figure that we cant go over for buying xmas presents this year so how do I suggest that he could get me a cheap ring and I would love it just as much if not more without him knowing I know what he wanted to get me. Im not sure how to drop the hint without giving the game away.

Answer 1

It sounds to me like you have a good thing going on right now. My fiance bought me an engagement ring, after he'd been saving up for a few years. I didn't necessarily need or even want the platinum one carat that sits on my finger right now, but it meant a lot to him. I felt the same exact way you did two years ago, but when he brought that ring out, he was so freakin' proud of himself that he was able to buy me a beautiful ring, I'm glad we waited. Plus, it's absolutely beautiful. I'm not saying you shouldn't mention a less expensive ring as an option, but do keep in mind he knows that other girls look at your ring, and he wants to get you the best ring he can. He wants to be proud of the rock that sits on your hand. I just want to give you a different perspective, that's all. I know I was sure surprised at how important he thought it was.

Best of luck.

Answer 2

Don't hint - talk it out. You've already had the marriage talk -- that was the hard part. The ring and wedding logistics are background noise. What you can jointly afford, how you want to start building your savings together, and your financial goals (i.e., saving for a house) are exactly the kinds of topics that married and soon-to-be-married people should be discussing.

When you have your conversation about Xmas presents, you can bring up the subject of wedding finances then. Like, "remember we talked about a spending limit for Xmas presents? Well, we ought to look at that in view of the fact that we might be getting married too long from now and need to be thinking about a budget." In the context of a global budget discussion, you can tell him you don't need or want an expensive ring, and it will make sense.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Go online and start looking at engagement rings. Make sure you do it in front of him. Start looking at really simple and inexpensive rings. He will notice. When he asks what you are doing tell him that you just wanted to look at rings and ask if he want to look at them with you. Tell him after all you will be getting married within the next couple years and you were wondering what kind of engagement rings and wedding bands you liked. Then tell him that you don't want anything big an expensive cause it is so stupid to buy something like that. Your love is all that matter. When marriage comes you want something cheap.
Go with tungston or titanium rings. Very pretty and very cheap. You can also get them on ebay or craigslist for cheap all the time. They sometimes comes with the band and the ring. Check them out.

Good luck.

Answer 4

If you have mutual friends, have the mutual friends tell him how you feel.

Also, if you go to secondhand stores or consignment shops, you can get a simple ring for $40, if you really need that sort of extraneous symbol.

People all over the world get engaged-- and even completely married-- without ANY rings. It's a non-essential detail.

Jewelry is such an unwise investment, anyhow. Better to spend his money on your new life together, or on the wedding itself--- or practically anything else.

Answer 5

Next time marriage is brought up, just say "I'd be happy with a ring from a cracker jack box" or look at a friends engagement ring and say "I'd just want something smaller and simple" or "my fingers are so small I'd be tickled with a small diamond and band" or something like that.

If your trusted source is someone he knows, the source could help your b/f find "the perfect ring" and point out some simple pretty bands.

Answer 6

ok 'soundhog' is just plain wrong! so ignore that one!
i know what you mean, i never wanted an engagement ring and once we started talking marriage, but before he proposed, i brought the subject around to rings and said if and when he was thinking of a ring i would love to have one band and no engagement ring. i explained what i thought was the perfect ring - a wide band with both our birthstones set into it. the stones are just shy of .25 caret and set in so they are flush with the band.
lo and behold my wish came true. i didn't want and didn't have and have never missed an engagement ring. what he did give me for an engagement gift was a charm bracelet with a single charm on it and for every special occasion since then he has tucked a gold charm into the bouquet of flowers he brings home. it may sound silly to others and not expensive enough to some but it worked for us.
no one else has a ring similar to mine and it still draws admiring comments from people. we've just celebrated our 40th wedding anniversary! and still happy!

Answer 7

As you both want to get married soon, I suggest you get him to propose at a place that is romantic and symbolic of marriage for both of you. Then plan a wedding as soon as possible. Tell him that the engagement period will be so short before the wedding that an engagement ring is not need. And that you two can think about expensive e rings later.

Answer 8

just tell him you dont like big gaudy rings, you want something simple or smaller, which will almost ALWAYS cost less. just like go to the store or look through a catolog and kind of hint to him that you like the less expensive ones. or you could buy yourself some rings just to wear for fashions sake, and make sure they are not expensive or huge, and tell him how much u love them. he may get the idea that you like the simpler things in life LOL. or have your friend drop some hints that you dont want a huge expensive rock.

Answer 9

It's great to see someone with this attitude! You have obviously figured out the real reason for getting engaged :)

I would just be completely straight with him I guess. It's not your fault that your friend let slip (unless you pestered them!) about his intentions, so don't feel guilty about knowing. After all, you have both discussed it. Just be open and honest. Let him know what you've written just here. I expect he'll be very relieved and you'll be able to get married without him worrying about the dent it's going to make in his wallet.

Answer 10

Bring it up slyly in conversatiopn one day.
Say, Can you believe J.Lo's engagement ring cost $3 million? I would seriously be happy with any ring as it's what it symbolizes, not what it is worth.

:)