Am I being selfish?

Question

I help my mom clean rooms at our family owned motel once a week but i answer the door all day long and night and do all the laundry also i make dinner for the family about 5-6 times a week and do most the house cleaning out of 7 people in home . I mean we all do dishes but i'm the one generally that vacuums wipes everything down dusts . haha you wouldn't think this if u seen my room but i try to keep a handle on things but people are putting off signals that im being selfish and lazy how do you all feel please be honest honesty is a virtual and sometimes truth from others is the best medicine to us as individuals thanks .

Answer 1

it doesnt sound to me as if you are lazy or selfish but if you are getting this feeling approach the people treating you this way or try or if you feel you can try and do more but it sounds to me like your doing a hell of a lot as it is. i would talk to them, maybe they dont realise everything you are doing.

Answer 2

Not being there and hearing other people's side of the story, what can I tell you? I know that a person can be industrious and helpful in some ways and simultaneously be lazy and selfish in others. My own dear friend is a dynamo of energy professionally, often putting in over 60 hours a week, and is very generous with his relatives (4 adults live in his house, rent free). But you can tell everywhere he has been in that house by the trail of dirty and misplaced items left laying about. Unless I reminded him, he'd never call home to advise that he won't be there for a meal. He uses "the last" of a food item but can't be bothered to add it to the grocery list, and so on.

Maybe the next time someone is "putting off signals" you should ask them in plain language if something is bothering them. Who knows, maybe you are getting the siganls wrong? If they DO have criticisms of your behavior, ask for examples.

Answer 3

You don't sound selfish at all. They may not realize how much you're actually doing. Maybe you can try casually bringing to their attention that you were able to do this or that. But not in a bragging way, just something like "oh btw I was able to do this so you won't have to worry about it". They might have so much on their mind that they aren't focused on what you're doing. A lot of times you won't be appreciated until you're not their doing it anymore. I know that was the case with my boyfriend when he was living at home. He used to do everything for his parents, but they'd alway say "you never do this or you never do that." Once he moved out they told him they finally realized how much he actually did for them. That sort of "housework" (I know you said it's a motel) is usually a thankless job. Just know you're doing your part.

Answer 4

It sounds like you are doing a lot, but maybe you aren't appreciated.

The best thing to do is talk to the people giving off the "signals" and ask them what they really think. What do they really want you to do?

Then, think about it. Is it fair, or are they being selfish? What are your options? Can you move out? What are other people doing, and how does it compare to what you do?

Good luck.

Answer 5

You are the most unselfish person I have come across.
Don heed the signals. Do only what you can without feeling the pressure then tell that now only this much

Answer 6

simple remedy here

BE LAZY for 3 or 4 days

let them see what life is really like when you ARE actually lazy, they may appreciate you all the more,

sometimes we take things for granted and need a hand seeing whats really infront of us all along

good luck

Answer 7

i can't tell u if you selfish or not .. coz maybe there are some things you didn't tell as about it .

any way i think you are not selfish if you doing all this stuff.