Would you call this person a devout Catholic?

Question

I really like this guy but think our differences in religion might be a problem. Just wondering your opinion of his behavior and religion:

1. His family is extremely religious...they're catholic, sent their children to catholic schools and sometimes seem a little extreme to me. He is very close to all of his family.
2. He drinks alcohol a lot and gets drunk with friends
3. He goes to strip clubs with friends when on vacation
4. He uses cuss words but doesn't say GD
5. He drank alcohol before 21
6. He is saving sex until marriage but he does other sexual acts with females
7. Wears jewelry which symbolizes the catholic faith. His father wears it too.
8. Goes to church every sunday and sometimes on wednesday
9. Goes to bars a lot


Thanks!

Answer 1

Well the no sex before marriage thing and the alcohol sure sounds Catholic but devout?

No, I've known devout catholics and they don't go to strip clubs and while some of them have done non-penetrative sex acts, the guilt they pile on themselves means it rarely happens again. As for alcohol, the ones with Irish heritage seem to drink, whereas the few with Asian heritage only do so occassionally, so I think that's more cultural than religious.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not religious, I'm an atheist, so I don't judge people for going to strip clubs or for their private business with their girl/boyfriend, but it would be hypocritical for a devout catholic or any hard-core christian whose bible tells them that even looking or thinkingin lustfully of a woman is the same as adultery (Matt 5:28) to do those things if they're serious about their religion.

His family sounds quite devout and he seems to go through the motions because that's what he knows. The no sex before marriage thing is probably a guilt trip from his upbringing, because he tries to sneak his way around the rules with the strip club thing and other sexual acts. If he wasn't worried about Hell, he'd probably go ahead and have sex.

Wearing catholic jewellery is hardly an indication of dedication to his faith, just a measure he takes to give the appearance of being Catholic.

Answer 2

No way is this guy a devout Catholic. He has put on a facade of Catholocism, to make it appear to others that he appreciates his faith. but he is only going through the motions by going to church, without putting any real thought behind it. I went to a Catholic high school, and if this guy were a devout Catholic, then he wouldn't be doing anything sexual with chicks, and definately woudn't be drinking all the time and wouldn't have started before 21. Any religion stresses the importance of not participating in self destructive activities. If he followed his religion or considered how his actions would be viewed by God, then he wouldn't being doing most of the stuff you listed.

Answer 3

He doesn't sound too extreme to me. He kind of sounds like my husband in his 20's. But my hubby didn't frequent nudie bars. Rather his bad influence friends took him along. Alcohol isn't as big of a deal with Catholics, but sex is. And the jewelry is normal. Families are important!

I think he sounds somewhat devout.

You should talk to him about what he thinks is important to his faith. Also, you may want to read a book about Catholocism because there are a lot of misconceptions. You need to know where he stands on the important issues to you before you write him off.

Answer 4

Are you going to catalog all your sins for us, too? Isn't that only fair?

Seriously, being a devout Catholic doesn't mean a person is absolutely sinless. We call it "practicing Catholicism" for a reason -- because it takes practice. So here's my assessment of your list.

1. Sounds like he's been given a good foundation in his Catholic faith and he comes from a close-knit family, which will bode well for your own marriage & family someday. As long as you aren't constantly criticizing his family, that is, because he's been part of that longer than he's been in a relationship with you. As a woman who married the oldest son of the oldest son of the oldest son of the oldest son of a VERY tight-knit family, I advise you to learn to love these people.

2. Part of his culture is alcohol, and he's probably not mature enough to handle it properly. Plus it bothers you, obviously, so it's something you two need to discuss and work out.

3. He is easily swayed by peer pressure and has fallen for society's pressure to objectify women. Another issue to discuss and work out.

4. Again, he is easily swayed by peer pressure. If it bothers you, discuss it with him. I personally think people who cuss a lot sound unintelligent. I teach my kids that each one of those words means, "I'm too stupid to think of the word I really mean to say." Nobody wants to sound stupid.

5. Swayed by peer pressure again.

6. Ditto. Add in "objectifying women" again, too. Do you mean women other than you? Then you need to tell him to knock it off or you're dumping him. I don't care if he's Catholic, baptist, atheist or whatever -- that's unacceptable.

7. So what if he wears jewelry that reflects his faith? It's just his style. Big deal! If it bothers you, do him a favor and remove yourself from the relationship so he can wind up with a girl who isn't so judgemental.

8. He's got good habits about going to church that will last a lifetime. That's very good. That will help him leave off all his immature behavior. And btw, Catholics are obligated to worship the Lord once a week at a minimum. And on all holy days, which sometimes fall on Wednesdays but not necessarily.

9. See my answer to #2.

Is he a devout Catholic? I don't know. That's something that is in the heart. He may be devout in his heart but unable to stand up to his friends and therefore needs to strengthen his faith and his resolve. But he's still a young man, so that's possible. Or, he may not be devout at all and have no desire to ever become devout and is just trying to slip through loophole after loophole. I have no idea. God knows, but I'm human and I don't even know this guy. Posting a list of his sins doesn't tell me enough.

Now then, why don't you post YOUR sins so I can assess those?

Answer 5

Sounds like a typical catholic to me. One advantage catholics have over others is they go to confession on Saturday have some communion on Sunday and then they are all cleansed and ready to go for another week. Many people make fun of the catholics but actually when you think about it no one else can go to church say a few thinks grab a hunk of bread and a glass of wine and be good until the next weekend when they start over.

Answer 6

Not a devout Catholic,but certainly a typical Catholic.Christians follow the Bible.Catholics follow their religion and pick and choose their beliefs.Want to test that out on him?Just point out some unbiblical Catholic doctrines and watch the double-minded answers he'll give you.Then get a Catholic catechism book and tell him what his religion teaches and his answers will be even more insane.That is the hallmark of any brand of Catholic.

Answer 7

Catholics do belive interior the saving grace of Jesus Christ. There are basically seven sacriments (baptism, reconciliation, communion, confermation, anointing of the ill, Holy orders, and marriage) Catholics are Christians as a results of fact Catholics the place the 1st group of christians. So all and sundry elce broke away kind the church. i've got listed some web pages that have reliable information regarding the Catholic church.

Answer 8

#8: Most Catholics don't go to church on Wednesday. That's kind of a Protestant thing. Usually, a Catholic would only go to Mass on a Wednesday if it were a holy day of obligation (Ash Wednesday, All Saints Day, Christmas). Technically, you can go to Mass every day, but that is not very common.

Answer 9

Sound like a good Irish catholic stereotype to me.

Answer 10

No, I would not call this person a devout Catholic. But I can't call him anything else, who are we to judge?