So today I had a post-graduate job interview for a position I really wanted and I am staying in the DC area as opposed to the New York area where I'm from, one of the reasons being that I want to stay near my bf.
So on the phone today he asked my how my interview was and said it sounded like it went well and wished me good luck and such.
But then he started saying, you know, I hope you realize that it's a tough job and you could be working almost 60-80 hours a week during the end of the fiscal year. And it almost sounded like he was being negative and said I should really think about whether or not that is is what I want.
So should I be mad at him because I feel like he's putting me down for a job I really want? Like, I understand there could be long hours but I think it will be worth it. Or is he just giving his honest opinion and I should listen to what he has to say?
What do you think? I know he wants to stay with me after college so it's not like he's trying to push me away..
2007-10-02 15:24:31 · 28 answers · asked by surfandsand10 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He's probably scared that you'll have less time for him.
Us guys like quality time, even if we won't admit it!
2007-10-02 15:28:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's trying to let you know there may be some down sides to your job. You're probably very excited, floating on a cloud happy. And it's good to feel that way, but sometimes our feelings tend to get in the way of reality. Do you want to work that much, because that is a lot of hours! He's just trying to help you not get into something that you'll end up hating in the long run.
2007-10-02 22:28:00 · answer #2 · answered by Be Still and know He's God 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can see why this might have upset you. If you were really excited about this job and then he said something negative, it can seem like he's trying to turn you away from it... but in reality, he's probably just looking out for your best interest.. PLUS the longer hours you work, the less time he can spend with you, which probably upsets him. That's not such a bad thing!
2007-10-02 22:27:42 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know the situation, but I don't think that he is pushing you away. I do think he has a few concerns. I would look at it as he is trying to be open minded. He might be concerned that you may be too busy. Men tend to need more attention despite what they say. Talk to him openly about it. Tell him your concerns and be open to hear his concerns. They might not be anything like you thought. He might be feeling pressure that you are only taking this job to be close to him and he doesn't want that responsibility. You might want to make sure he understands that this is a good move for your career. Best of luck to you!!
2007-10-02 22:31:21 · answer #4 · answered by smwah345 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have plenty of reason to be upset & frustrated with bf. I believe he is just making sure that you are aware of what you are getting into because he cares. I really doubt he is putting you down or calling you an idiot like mentioned in another answer. Good luck with the job.
2007-10-02 22:30:34 · answer #5 · answered by Jeri E 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends. Maybe he was being a concern boyfriend, it could've been he's thinking of all the time he might not get to spend with you. Unless every time you are doing something that might be beneficial to and for you, he always got something non-motivating to say. Its a possibility that he could be jealous. You do whats best for you. Only you know what you really need.
2007-10-02 22:34:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think u shouldnt be mad at him because 60-80 hours a week is a lot just make sure that when ur together u make it the best time u can
hope u get the job
2007-10-02 22:28:42 · answer #7 · answered by italiangirl943 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
god, dont be someone who tries to analyze every single word or action her boyfriend takes
thats just really annoying and unfair to your boyfriend
anyways, heres my answer:
of course he's not trying to put you down!
no honest-to-goodness bf would want his gf to smolder her dreams and goals
hes just being a wonderful bf, believe it or not
you see, he loves you enough to want you to be happy always, so hes just making sure if this is the path you want to take
after all, if you end up miserable, that'll just make him miserable too, from what i can tell from his minor description
in a simple translation, hes basically reminding you to review and recheck your decision, so you wont make any mistake that could make you unhappy.
so you see, hes not being negative or trying to put you down - hes just making sure you know what your doing
n im sorry for insulting you before, but really, dont try to scrutinate every move he makes!
more often than not, there is no secret meaning behind the action!
2007-10-02 22:35:23 · answer #8 · answered by Frank 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well you know what... You went to college for this job if this is your dream just go right ahead and do it! Don't have your bf telling you what he thinks about it. Its not about him. He didn't pay for your tution your the one who is. If my bf was telling me that i would tell him too bad! Because I want to go in psychology and nothing is going to make me quit because thats my dream, even my bf who i want to marry after i graduate. So you go right ahead an do what you want to do! Not him! Good Luck with your future!!!!
2007-10-02 22:31:28 · answer #9 · answered by You'll shoot your eye out! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he just wanted to warn you about the job, I don't believe threes any other motive behind it. Unless threes other hints of him hating you for taking the job I couldn't tell ya. Just remember we're men, we are more oblivious to what we say may be insensitive.
2007-10-02 22:31:22 · answer #10 · answered by Cloudmd 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe he is jealous because you've found a good job, and it is the type of opportunity that he wishes he could find.
I also wonder if he is afraid that if you work a lot of hours it will negatively affect your relationship.
2007-10-02 22:29:13 · answer #11 · answered by georgiegirl422 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋