Im 20 year old chicana and i come from a very strict and tradional mexican family. That i hate to say are some what racist, and i know would not want me to date out side my race. But see a few weeks ago i meet this really great black guy that i like alot and im attracted to and i could see going to the next level of a serious realtionship. But im really scared of what my family might think or do when they find out. See hes cool about keeping it on the low for a while till i can tell my family but i know thats not fair to him to have to hide him like if im assamed of him. which im not. Im just scared i have always been the one to follow what ever my family says but im really scared and i dont know what to do. Do i tell my family and see what happens? and have my family hate me . or keep it a secreat? Or do i end it before it even starts????? help!!!
2007-10-02 08:49:46 · 9 answers · asked by bashfulmexicana 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Bueno, paisana I suggest to tell him. However you mention that they could be somewhat racist, So I suggest you tell them hypothetically how will they feel if you started dating a black guy. Now if they don't agree that's their problem but explain to them how will they feel if someone acted the same way toward our race. If they don't like you dating someone besides your race, they are not allowed to stop you because you are already an adult.
I hope my advice helps out, buena suerte paisana.
2007-10-02 09:00:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't end it. If it's something or someone you feel strongly about your family should accept it & support you no matter what it is, as long as it's good for you & makes you happy. You may be surprised. I'm dating a 25 year old mexican man who's family is very traditional and at first weren't accepting of our relationship at all (I'm a little white girl from Kansas haha) but I'm always very respectful & nice around them I try my best to speak spanish with them and get to know them all. Once they got to know me they began to see me for who I am, not my race. Hopefully you're family will be like that too.
2007-10-02 14:28:34 · answer #2 · answered by Erica!! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should tell your family like today that you like this guy and really sit down and have a talk with them. I hate to see that people can't be together just because of their race that's so stupid. But anyhow let thim know while it's still early. Your 20 so if you really like him maybe you should date him and if your family really loves you, they'll accept it. Good Luck to you two.
2007-10-02 09:03:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try to tell your family as soon as possbile if you're really serious about this guy your family will love you no matter what and if they really see that you're happy then they will come around and accept him I do tell you that it might be hard at first and it can take some time but don't worry they will come around
how does his family feel about you should be another question you should ask.
Good Luck
2007-10-02 08:57:17 · answer #4 · answered by curious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Haha. I know exactly what you are talking about cuz Im going through the EXACT same thing...the only difference being dat im 17. Honestly if your scared about wat they might think the best thing to do is not tell them...what they dont know wont hurt:) Ive been wit my guy for 6 months already and my family doesnt know anything. DONT END IT!!! Good luck!!!!!!!!!! :)
2007-10-02 09:02:32 · answer #5 · answered by *Angie* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my brother is going threw the same thing at this moment! he's black and his gurl is mexican! they dont like my brother because he's black and they talk about him in spanish! little do they he speaks spanish and know everyword their saying! and they said some really hurtful things! but my brother is no punk he suked it up! he gurl jus turned 21 and he's 19! sounds yung but really mature! i say dont put him threw that situtaion that ur going threw cause its not going to do anything but make the situtation worse for you and him! unless your willing to fight for him!.....which i highly doubt! so i suggest just being friends that way you get the best of both worlds!
2007-10-02 08:57:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow that's some drama! while that is throughout you ought to write a e book! properly i'm male, white and English it particularly is worse than being black any day! First enable me say that to three volume i'm able to relate on your concern and that i sympathise. My mothers and fathers are knowledgeable human beings and don't have prejudice for any race, my grandparents on the different hand are of the old college and have hassle accepting people who're distinctive to them, and that they do no longer carry back! they say it properly suited in front of me, approximately all and sundry. you ought to undergo in strategies that for the time of being racist they are being selfish (in basic terms being concerned approximately what human beings would think of of them)so which you wanna dish it back! go out with whoever you like and enable them to declare what they're going to, they're going to get used to it! besides, regardless of in the event that they decline to settle for him, they'd't ignore their very very own flesh and blood. in the event that they have any experience they're going to see the blunders they have made quicker or later. As for taking him homestead, do no longer rush it! go out with him and tell your loved ones the place your going yet no longer what handed off, once you come back back act as in case you by no ability left, they gets curious quicker or later and who knows? they'd even ask to fulfill him themselves. And in case you prefer to debate it with him make it clean that your on his facet, communicate approximately it as a impediment no longer an end on your relationship. Excuse me for combating there yet i'm commencing to experience somewhat gay with my new discomfort aunt place, I commonly answer bilogy questions! stable success
2016-10-05 23:46:21 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I came from a strict prodistant back ground,(bigots), i dated inneracial for several years, after my divorce, we all had a great time except for the family!! I'm Cherokee/hillbilly, they will adjust, if you make them!!
2007-10-02 08:58:12 · answer #8 · answered by happywjc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you guys can't keep it low forever, how do you know this will go futher if you only just met him?
dont' date him then if you know you'll be disowned
2007-10-02 08:56:31 · answer #9 · answered by Adrienne L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋