Please help me...I got word that a friend of mine killed someone a couple of days ago in Afganistan while in battle. He currently does not served in the Army but works for the government with the military. His mother is a dear friend and mother to me. This fella is in his mid 20's and I can't imagine what he's going through. I am trying not to get to emotionally involved but it's so hard. How can I help his mother cope? All she wanted to do was bring him home. I know this is his job and all but he will never ever be the same. Right now...both him and his mother are doing everything to numb the pain.
Please any insight with me great on how to help my dear friends.
2007-10-02 08:41:14 · 12 answers · asked by Girly 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
Thanks everyone for the input!
2007-10-02 08:56:02 · update #1
You do what you have to do to make it home. When he see's his mother, he will realize he is much better off alive, and I'm sure she would agree.You never forget, but time helps. Take every day as a gift. Live to the fullest, and squeeze every drop of pleasure out of life you can. A soldiers job is not to die for his country, it's to make the other guy die for his!!
2007-10-02 10:02:04 · answer #1 · answered by Marine till Death 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's alive! His mother should light a candle and thank her God that he is still among the living. When he gets home, leave him alone. Don't try to "get the whole story" out of him. He's been to war. When he wants to talk about it, he will. I beg you not to use shows like "Oprah" as an example of how to deal with this situation. He's going to need time to get over what happened. And he's the one who is putting together the calendar for that. Not you. Not his mother.
2007-10-02 15:52:16 · answer #2 · answered by desertviking_00 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Killing someone in combat affects people in different ways. It is hard to say how he is handling the situation. I do know that there are excellent resources available to him for mental and emotional support in Afgahnistan and Iraq. If he is having difficulties with the situation, then he should first contact his Chaplain.
I would not let it bother you too much. Most people in Iraq and Afgahnistan have had a lot of time to think about the possibility of killing someone, and it is not something that should be too much of a shock to him. Keep praying and be supportive.
2007-10-02 16:06:07 · answer #3 · answered by James W 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well its war. You kill or be killed and you move on. If your not strong enough to deal with it there is help. you do not know the details on what happened or it went down. I know you want to help the only thing you really can do is just be a friend. Listen, comfort and that's about it.
2007-10-02 15:52:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He volunteered to go and knew the risks. The fact that he killed someone more than likely means that he was defending himself. If I was your friend, I would be glad that I am alive and had the means to neutralize the threat that otherwise would have harmed me.
2007-10-02 15:45:33 · answer #5 · answered by Voice of Liberty 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
You could start by pointing out the fact the your friend is still alive. Better a dead Taliban than your friend being dead.
2007-10-02 15:45:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
she needs to be strong and listen to him thats important it's not easy to take a life i've taken several it hard and will never leave your head he is young and will find comon ground withen himself to deal with it I am retired military once again listen to him and show him you suport him and love him
2007-10-02 15:48:56 · answer #7 · answered by glenn_montgomery88 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
as William Tecumseh Sherman once said war is hell. if you are in a war zone and are armed there is a reason. you can kill or be killed and killing in war is biblical and acceptable.
2007-10-02 15:47:14 · answer #8 · answered by Loren S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Contact the department that your friend work. Does he has life insurance, taking care of that as well.
2007-10-02 15:43:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
well just think of all the happy things you did with him. and when you talk to her it is ok to cry its hard i kno i lost someone and i am a girl but i hate crying in front of people and sometimes you just have to. hope all goes well. i am very sorry for your loss.
2007-10-02 15:52:02 · answer #10 · answered by MOJI BRYANT 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋