My daughter's father is manipulating my child by talking negatively about me and grandparents. How do I keep her from believing him? I shield her from the upset he causes us. Don't talk about him negatively. I can see a change in her attitude towards me and grandparents when she comes home for his parenting time.
2007-10-02 07:29:22 · 12 answers · asked by LoLo 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
See, this cr*p peeves me off. Some parents are so danged selfish that they are willing to damage their child to get back at the other parent. You tell him straight up (dang I use that phrase a lot) that what he is doing is causing more damage for your daughter than it is you. If he wants to get back at you, he's going to have to find another way because all he's doing is hurting her. If he wants to fund for therapy the next 20 years, he needs to back off.
Now, with your child. You are doing the right thing by not bashing the father. But, you are going to have to sit down with her and talk to her and remind her how much you and grandparents love her and would do anything to for her. That she shouldn't feel threatened by what daddy is saying. But, don't force her to talk about what daddy says because that's going to put her in the middle and make her withdrawl more.
If worse comes to worse, bring her into a child psychologists.
2007-10-02 07:35:45 · answer #1 · answered by CC 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know a lot of very immature people use their children as if they were pawns in a chess games. Most states now require parenting classes for divorced couples and they ward against this sort of thing. All I can tell you is do not resort to the same sort of tactic. Always speak highly of her father and her grandparents, she will soon figure who the better person is. My daughter went through this with her son for four years and now he does not even want to go spend the night at his grandparents or his fathers and that is sad. My daughter still makes him go because she feels that her son still deserves a father and why should he get off and not have to spend time with his son? You would be surprised how fast kids figure these things out. My grandson is only 10. Good luck keep up the good work, play with her make one night a game night and she will look up to you, teach her to cook and to love, girls need a roll model.
2007-10-02 07:41:21 · answer #2 · answered by teresa m 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your daughter is saying so then you all could sit down and talk. You know the difference between right and wrong.
You have to teach your child the difference between right and wrong and leave it at that. If she takes it any further it's called pitting parents which is also pulled in homes where parents are married, separate, single, divorced, relatives, or not - even teachers. No, an adult shouldn't be lying and neither should a child be reacting or enjoying spreading it.
2007-10-02 09:05:43 · answer #3 · answered by GoodQuestion 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By showing her the opposite, kids are not that niave. Show her that you love her the same and so do you're grandparents. She will judge for herself what the truth is. Just reinforce the positives and let her come to the conclusion that he is a liar. He will hurt him in her eyes in the future.
2007-10-02 07:33:56 · answer #4 · answered by solomonfever 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would advise reading up on Parent Alienation Syndrome (PAS). Right now it's a mild case, but at least you can see what is happening, what can happen, and how to fix it while you still can. I believe if you nip it in the bud now, you can prevent much heartache in the future for you and your daughter.
2007-10-02 09:14:43 · answer #5 · answered by DesignDiva1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing for you to do is not to try to prove to her that what he is saying are lies. What you need to do is tell your child that some times parents feel like they want are going to lose their babies and get scared. Tell your baby that you love her and that you want her to love her dad just as much......Your actions will speak for you and if you don't bad mouth her dad she will see that it is him and not you.
2007-10-02 10:19:14 · answer #6 · answered by LittleDaisy. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her to never believe anyone unless they show her the proof. If she comes home and tells you what her dad said, hold out your hand and tell her to drop the proof in there.
2007-10-02 07:56:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you really cant just ignoreit the truth will eventually come out. you trying to deny it is calling his father a liar which is just as bad so just love your daughter and the truth will eventually come out.
2007-10-02 07:34:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, talk to her father about this. Tell him how rude and manipulative he is being. Also, try talking to your daughter, ask her what her father tells her and tell her if it`s true or not.
2007-10-02 07:33:28 · answer #9 · answered by Sammi♥ 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Simply ask ur daughter ,what her father telling to her is true. ur father is a good man and has no bad habit except telling lies.
2007-10-02 07:36:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋