we used a condom but it tore i need help im 18 and not ready to be a father
2007-10-02 06:38:22 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
The first thing you both need to do is find out for sure.... and (this part is REALLY important) no matter how scared you get, resist the temptation to be a d i c k about it. No matter how afraid you are, she's doubly afraid because she has no way to walk away from the situation. If she takes a home test, be there with her. If she goes to a clinic, be there, too. Once you know one way or the other, sit down and talk candidly about what your options are and how you both intend to handle the situation. You're not the first people this has happened to, and you won't be the last. One word about condoms: If you have any kind of petroleum distillates on your body (like vaseline, etc) that condom will dissolve into mere shreds if it's a latex variety. That bit of news is only helpful for the next occasion, but it's data you need nonetheless. The main thing to remember is be there with her every step of the way and never give her the opportunity to feel alone in this predicament. Your manhood stock will go up 75 points on that action alone. Don't panic, and you'll be fine...just take everything one step at a time....and if steps four and five aren't required, don't worry about them in advance. However this turns out, good luck to you both.
2007-10-02 07:09:50 · answer #1 · answered by Captain S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not ready to be a father than you shouldn't be having sex, with or with out a condom. But atleast you were being smart and actually used a condom. Is your gf on birth control? If she isn't and she didn't get pregnant this time, maybe she should go to the health deparment and get some birth control. If she does end up being pregnant, you should be there for her and the baby. but you have to commit 100%. Kids are the best thing that can happen to you and no one is ever really ready for kids. Good luck and please be safe.
2007-10-02 13:45:09 · answer #2 · answered by lisa_bsb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you know that condoms have a 17 percent failure rate?No method of birth control is 100 percent just fyi for the future. Well I suggest she go to planned parenthood to review options for adoption etc. Talk with her and hopefully you can BOTH decide what to do . She needs to know that you are not financially able to care for this child. Often girls want to keep the baby for emotional reasons but it is not rational since a child costs money and the father is the one who pays. Best wishes and try to keep calm.
2007-10-02 13:43:24 · answer #3 · answered by barthebear 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First, if she is pregnant, you need to suport her in any way that you can. Stand by her side now if she also thinks tht she might be pregnant. Do not abandon her in any part of her possible pregnancy.
You'll need to do whatever you think is in the best interest of your girl and the baby. If she is not pregnant, suck this up as a lesson in life and learn from it.
2007-10-02 13:44:58 · answer #4 · answered by Jeff H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you are ready otbe a father, you did the crime, now you do the time.
If you weren't ready to be a father then you shouldn't have been having sex.
Don't get me wrong I am all for premarital sex and having sex when you want. But that does not mean that you get to wuss out and relinqish your duties.
start acting like the man you were pretending to be.
2007-10-02 13:47:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u don't have to take care of the baby if your really not ready to, but u do have to give it support ex: vist the baby once a week and give your girl money each month also in a year or 2 maybe move in with them.
2007-10-02 13:46:48 · answer #6 · answered by zoey z 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well there was not point in wearing a condom. but ur going to have to take care of it now. u 2 r the ones who had sex
2007-10-02 13:48:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do would be to help take care of the baby cause it would be hard on one person to raise a baby.
Good Luck
2007-10-02 13:46:01 · answer #8 · answered by Lynn R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't DO anything. You may not have a choice about being a father.
What you can do is be honest with your gf. But only AFTER you know for sure. Don't be a jerk to her, support her. She is the one that has to go through the experience, not you.
2007-10-02 13:44:33 · answer #9 · answered by nurse ratchet 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What answer are you looking for?
If you're not ready to be a father, you shouldn't be having sex. Didn't you go to health class?
SEX IS PRIMARILY FOR PROCREATION
Take responsiblity for your actions. You've created life, whether you wanted to or not. You should have considered the consequences before you did the deed.
It's time to grow up.
2007-10-02 13:44:14 · answer #10 · answered by Bumblebee 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋