i know this is going to sound odd or maybe rude but how do i try to talk my girlfriend into having sex? i mean we have brought up the subject a few times but how do i tell her? we plan to be together as long as possible and i am worried she might only want to have sex to have children. im guessing she doesn't have much of a sex drive yet because she is a virgin. We've been together for three years. am i rushing anything or is this how i should be? how can i talk to her about us having sex? any help is very much appreciated.
2007-10-02 05:56:15 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
she is shy about it though. thats why i ask. she hasn't exactly done anything with anyone. she doesn't know how to act. thats why i ask.
2007-10-02 06:01:42 · update #1
Wow. She is still a virgin and doesn't even want to talk about having sex. She is a rare girl these days. You might want to hold on to that. She seems special, don't ruin that for her or your self. What if you break up down the road she may regreat giving her virginity over to you. If you want to have sex then break up with her, that will give her a chance to find a guy who will love the fact she is saving her self.
Thats a rare kinda girl. I would hold on to that one.
2007-10-02 06:11:27 · answer #1 · answered by Belinda J 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
we plan to be together as long as possible and i am worried she might only want to have sex to have children.
Ask her if that is so?
im guessing she doesn't have much of a sex drive yet because she is a virgin.
Being a virgin doesnt have anything to do with sex drive. I had so much more sex drive when i was a virgin.
after losing my virginity, i have no sex drive because i think "this is it? bad sex? when will guys learn to make love?!"
2007-10-02 13:09:14 · answer #2 · answered by 光 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that you would love to make love to her but not until she is ready. She may want to wait until you are married. If you truly love her, this should not be a problem. If you do not want to wait for the sex, perhaps you should propose sooner. Make sure you truly do love her because a girl's first time is something she will never forget. If it is a bad experience, you may ruin it for her, for the rest of her life. When she is ready make it as romantic as possible, roses, chocolates, candlelight, soft romantic music, preferably following a nice night out on the town at a great restaurant! To be followed by a slow dance by moonlight.
Remember always treat her with respect and NEVER
forget NO is NO no matter when she says it. If you think she is ready and at the last minute she says no, then stop! It may be painful, but if you do not stop you are legally guilty of rape. So think before you do something that could conceivably land you in jail. Also remember there are statutory age of consent laws in each state. If you have sex with someone who is younger than the statutory age of consent in you state (Even with her consent) you will be guilty of statutory rape. I am not trying to scare you,but I have seen too many young men end up in jail because they let their sex drive control their actions rather than their brains. When she is ready, and you both are over the statutory age of consent, it can be the best time of your lives for both of you.
Good Luck, when the time (And age) are right
Also remeber just because you are done, may not mean she is satisfied. Sometimes it is best to make sure she is satisfied first, then you. For many women the act of intercourse is not enough, so make sure she is as happy as you will be, First!
2007-10-02 13:13:44 · answer #3 · answered by B. D Mac 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you two? You should respect her wishes. There are other things you guys can do. If you plan on being together for as long as possible, and you've already gone 3 years without it, whats a few more? It may be a bond with herself she has made to wait until marriage or until she knows she is going to spend forever with a guy.
2007-10-02 13:01:39 · answer #4 · answered by Kendal's Mommy 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's up to her if she wants to do it or not. But I can tell you that it's definitely more akward talking about it. It has to be the right moment. Alone, kissing, whatever. Maybe take her out for a nice dinner, tell her how you feel about her, find somewhere you can be alone and then maybe she'll go for it. If she continues to put the brakes on you and you can't hold out for much longer then maybe you need to find someone else. It sounds harsh but if your wants and needs aren't the same and you can't wait - move on.
2007-10-02 13:02:42 · answer #5 · answered by Niko 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't talk a woman into having sex. You wait until she's ready to do it with you. Plus, if she really liked you enough, virgin or not she'll have sex with you. This sounds like your relationship needs more time to grow before you have sex with her.
2007-10-02 13:00:40 · answer #6 · answered by Class 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
if shes a virgin shes probebly nervous.. i mean your first time for a girl is sapose to be special. r u the one she wants to share it with. Make her no that ur the ine she wants. take it slow in steps and make her feel buetiful. she blow through her inocent side soon enough, just make sure u never hurt her, then shell doubt you. make her feeel likethe star of a movie, or a fairytale.. i should know im a vigin =]
2007-10-02 13:11:55 · answer #7 · answered by nikkie l 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she might be saving herself for marriage, but 3 years...that is a long time to be with someone. Just tell her you want to..and see what she says. And if she wants to wait you should respect that.
2007-10-02 13:01:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you have to ask, you're too young to do it. If after 3 years, you can't have an open discussion with your girlfriend about this, then you don't have a real relationship.
2007-10-02 12:59:54 · answer #9 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well she might not be ready or she is a little afraid. you need to be patient with her and kindly ask her if she will have sex before she gets married.
2007-10-02 19:00:28 · answer #10 · answered by natie90 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋