for the past 8 yrs i have done nothing but ruin our finances and even ended up bankrupt. i see myself spending so much. we are again in debt that he doesn't even know because he thinks the bills are already paid for. when im out there buying lotteryticket it's like i blank out i don't even think about what im doing until i spent it all. i also fight with my self to stop but i always think that the next one will have the jackpot. I have been diagnose with Bipolar and off my meds. i don't know what to do at this point! telling him will be out of the question. i have slip into a depression because of it. every morning i wake up that it will not happen and it does. this past week i spent $2,000 when that could've gone towards bill. What should i do? i need help!my family does'nt deserve this. i have a wonderful husband..not perfect, but very close to it. i know if i tell this he will probably leave because he is tired of living like this.i can't help my self so plz don't judge me.advise
2007-10-02 03:15:03 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
FIRST AND FOR MOST. I KNOW WITH BIPOLAR PEOPLE STOP TAKING THE MEDS BECAUSE THEY FEEL BETTER. PLEASE REMEMBER IT IS THE MEDS THAT ARE MAKING YOU FEEL BETTER. YOU NEED TO STAY ON THEM. ALSO SOUNDS LIKE AN ADDICTION. CALL YOUR DOCTOR AND HAVE HIM REFER YOU TO A COUNSELOR.
REMEMBER, WHEN YOU SPEND YOU TAKE AWAY FROM THE FAMILY. ASK YOURSELF-SHOULD WE EAT AND HAVE A ROOF OVER OUR HEAD OR SHOULD I BUY THIS TICKET?
THE BEST THING TO DO FOR NOW IS TURN THE MONEY OVER TO YOUR HUSBAND AND ALLOW YOURSELF A CERTAIN AMOUNT A WEEK AND WHEN YOUR MONEY IS GONE IT IS GONE.
I HAVE SOMEBODY TO DO MY FINANCES BECAUSE I AM BAD AT PAYING BILLS. SHOPPING FILLS A VOID FOR US. ONE THAT WE ARE NOT FILLING OURSELVES.
2007-10-02 03:20:55 · answer #1 · answered by Amber E. M. T 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is away too good for you. Why do you take advantage of him. Do you work??? Do you know that money does not grow in trees. Why does he leave the money with you if you are not responsible.
Try to do something else with your time.Study about something, go to school, go to the gym, have lunch with your friends, Get a JOB and you will know the value of the money.
I just dont like when people want to treat this behavior with medicine. Its something that WE call SELF CONTROL.
2007-10-02 10:30:33 · answer #2 · answered by Gabrielle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like an compulsive behavior. It can be treated if you allow it. Even if its NOT compulsive, it sounds like you need a marriage councilor. Seek help. That's what it's there for. And for the love of Odin, take your meds. Yes it's a pain to keep up with but you can't be all that surprised you to manic and spend the house note.
2007-10-02 10:20:47 · answer #3 · answered by ~Heathen Princess~ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you need to join gamblers anonymous
Tell your husband NOW. Tell him you need HELP. Let him handle the finances and pay the bills. He will find out about it when the utilities start getting cut off anyway so tell him now.
Go to a consumer credit counselor and let them contact your creditors and set up a budget for you and your husband.
This can be worked out. Don't give up.
2007-10-02 10:22:15 · answer #4 · answered by suzie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to tell him because u are messing up his life and yours. Also when u do tell him let him know u need help and please get you in a 12 step program for shopping fanatics anonymous. Make sure you make it clear you wont help, because if u don't change he will leave u. Don't blow a good man because many women wish they have what you have. Look in the mirror and say to yourself every day I'am going to make a change. Good Luck ;-)
2007-10-02 10:58:38 · answer #5 · answered by Queen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly honey, you have to tell him!! You may be able to go as a couple to see a professional. Your right, you do need help, but you also need support and who better to give it to you than your husband!! I dont think you are going to get the answer your looking for on YA. I think you need to seek professional help with this one. Good Luck!! I hope it all works out for you.
2007-10-02 10:21:36 · answer #6 · answered by Treyes 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you are ill. you need help, and you won't get it here. You need to see a psychiatrist. And you had best tell your husband, he is going to find out anyway, and it would be better coming from you than from a collection agency. He needs to take away your plastic and your check book, he needs to keep control of all the money because you obviously cannot be trusted with it. So, get yourself to a psychiatrist, hand your plastic and checkbook to your hubby and tell him why. If he loves you, he will realize that you have a serious mental illness and help you, if he doesn't love you, then you don't want him in your life anyway.
2007-10-02 10:21:02 · answer #7 · answered by essentiallysolo 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Go to Gamblers anonymous.... you owe it to ur family to try that out. My child hood home is now being sold, because my dad gambled it away, he missed his grand daughters 2nd b-day party because he couldn't leave the tables in AC.... my advice to you is to have ur hubby take all ur credit cards away, take away ur power to withdraw money from the bank, and put u on some kind of weekly allowance... where u only have that for 2 weeks... thats what my dad is doing now that hes in GA....don't let it go to far, i don't know if u have children, but it seriously made me lose respect for him, untill he started GA...
2007-10-02 10:22:18 · answer #8 · answered by xopinkrose 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to get back on your meds NOW. You will never be able to control this unless you have professional medical help. You also need to get into counseling/therapy with your husbnad, or you will lose him. Don't wait. Seek help today. Good luck.
2007-10-02 10:23:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you want to have control you really need to take your meds! And a relationship can't be based off lies so you need to come clean before he finds out the wrong way. Good Luck.
2007-10-02 10:20:00 · answer #10 · answered by Heather 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋