I HAVE BEEN WITH MY BOYFRIEND FOR FIVE YEARS IN A SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP, HE NEVER DISCLOSES TO ANYONE THAT HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND AND I FIND THAT STRANGE, HE NEVER TALKS ABOUT MARRIAGE AND ITS MAKING ME REALLY INSECURE. HE CONSTANTLY FLIRTS WITH OTHER GIRLS HOWEVER SINCE I FEEL I KNOW MY BOYFRIEND I KNOW THE FLIRTING IS HARMLESS AND HE IS ONLY DOING IT TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER ABOUT HIMSELF. HE RECENTLY TOOK HIS EX OUT FOR DINNER AND NEVER TOLD ME ABOUT IT HOWEVER HE GETS ANGRY WHEN I TALK TO OTHER MEN. I RECENTLY GOT A LIFT TO WORK FROM HIS MATE AND HE BECAME VERY ANGRY SO HE HIT ME. PLEASE HELP ME BECAUSE I AM FEELING REALLY DEPRESSED. I FEEL I CANT LIVE WITHOUT HIM!
2007-10-01 23:56:25 · 18 answers · asked by kitty 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Hello there, did I hear you right???????????can't live with out him????????? he just HIT YOU for getting a ride home!!! dump the looser!!!
2007-10-02 00:00:12 · answer #1 · answered by cheri h 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry to hear that you are having a tough time of it! In most cases once a guy gets to the point where he feels like hitting you is okay you relationship is pretty much doomed. Respect is Respect!!! You respect him so he should respect you.. A one sided relationship is not the way to go. Can you honestly forget that he stepped over the line and hit you? Forgive maybe, Forget never!! You need to stand up for yourself. Put your foot down!! Or get out before you really get hurt! I wish there was an easier way, But there just isn't. When a man, a good man really loves you Flirting in front of you is out of the question!! I don't want to sound mean...But are you a puppy to get kicked around when ever he gets in a bad mood? Next thing you know he will start a fight just to get out of the house to party with his friends, or some chic that turns his crank for the moment..Then what come on back just because he knows that you will be there and can't do anything about it!!! Their a ton of good guy's out there, and just as many jerks.Don't take the I can't live without him approach. You are better than that!!! If you don't get out now than you risk getting hurt a lot worse!! I wish you the best of luck, please be careful!! .... zenitramynnad@yahoo.com
2007-10-02 07:25:36 · answer #2 · answered by DANNY M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you CAN live without him. And I will bet you all the money in the world that your life will be better without him. I know it is hard to leave someone you have been with for so long, but it sounds like he doesnt even really want to be with you, either.
There are so many bad signs here, I would tell you to leave him for each of them if they stood alone.
NO PERSON has any right to hit you... EVER. You need to distance yourself as much as possible from this guy. You deserve someone caring that will want to tell the whole world he is dating you.
You know in your heart that you should not be in this relationship, please listen to that and respect yourself by getting out of there and never turning back. Try talking to a counselor if you can, they can help you recover and start a new life.
My heart goes out to you, I hope you can find the strength to make these changes!
2007-10-02 07:04:55 · answer #3 · answered by susanbamboozlin 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He has put you in a really tough spot. He is acting indifferent to you and your feelings, and it doesn't sound like this is something new to him. I think if he has hit you then you should consider leaving him versus hoping for a change in him.
You say that you feel like you can't live with out him. I don't think that's strange at all for someone in your spot. The reason I say this is because being on the receiving end of an abusive and indifferent relationship, as you are, devalues a person and undermines them of confidence in so many ways, especially if it's something endured for a long time.
Look, you are valuable. You are worth so much more than the way he treats you. The problems lie with him.
I know it would not be easy to leave him behind, but I would encourage you to do so. Start small, try within your mind to begin envisioning life without him, life where you feel confident, valuable, and where you aren't being lied to, and can trust the ground you walk on. Envision being with someone you can trust, someone who thinks so highly of you that they would brag to everyone that you were theirs.
Another great thing would be to start talking to a therapist. You're self-esteem, and self-confidence can be repaired. Talking to someone will you help you come out of your mind and help you get a healthier bearing in your life. One of the main reasons I suggest this is because you say, you feel that you can't live without him when it is clear that he is bad for you. Feeling compelled to be with someone that is bad for you is very comparable to addiction and can be overcome.
Eventually, you will begin to see the things in life that you are passionate about, and you will be able to pursue life without his abuse holding you back, and putting you down.
Everyone has the basic needs of safety and security, and to live a healthy full life you need to as well. I wish you the best...
2007-10-02 07:38:50 · answer #4 · answered by blujello 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy doesn´t love you and doesn´t deserve you!!!
It sounds to me like you are better off without him. It sounds like he was emotionally and even physically abusive.
It's a shame that he had to stoop so low and treat you so terribly, who knows how far he would have gone with his abuse. NO MAN HAS THE RIGHT TO HIT YOU , GET THAT.
YOU
You deserve to be treated like a lady.AS soon as he laid a hand on you it is time to leave.
.He does to you he will do again.. Not to you but also to other girls. This is a behaviour of a guy who is not satisfied with himself and insecure.
Just remember one thing. you self-respect is more important than anything else in the world.
give him a kick into his a-s-s... that´s exactly what he deserves!!!
LEAVE Me ...right now...its your wake up call .
And regarding break up dont worry about it coz
We all have been trough this and we know that it´s really painf
ul, first you think it´s the end of the world, but it really isn´t. It´s a new opportunity to move on in life!!! Believe me... Your heart is broken now but it will heal in time...give it some time.
2007-10-02 07:31:13 · answer #5 · answered by void 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Although you feel like that you will be able to.It doesn't sound like he loves you or think much of you at all, if he won't even admit to ever having a girlfriend. Do you ever go out with a bunch of people as a couple? If he hit you then you should leave him although it might not have been serious next time it might be. Although you may say he's never done it before, if he can do it once he can do it again. Go to your friends and family for support while you get over him. I'm afraid to say he's not worth it!!
2007-10-02 07:01:45 · answer #6 · answered by Matt 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Oh honey get out of this relationship he has mentally and physically abused you no woman or man deserves that you can do much better than this loser,this boyfriend of yours ain't no real man he's a weakling,don't stick around for round two of the physical abuse honey cause next time and there will be a next time you might not be so lucky get out if this relationship sweetie you can do alot better than this d;ckhe@d and you most certainly can live without him and you will do just fine you will meet someone that is well deserving of you PLEASE RUN AWAY FROM THIS RELATIONSHIP AND DON'T LOOK BACK EVER
2007-10-02 07:10:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Christ, do yourself a favour love and dump him quick smart. He's a controlling loser who wants to f@*k around behind your back but doesn't want you to do the same. The fact that he has hit you should be more than enough to have you running for the hills!!!
Don't think for a minute that him hitting you was in any way your fault for accepting a lift from his friend, he is waste of space who will hit you again for even less!! get out now!!!
2007-10-02 07:12:36 · answer #8 · answered by JOANNE C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its clear you are in a very unhealthy and abusive relationship,where your very being is been sucked out of you .You need to get out of this situation and fast!! Talk to someone you can trust and if not phone for help, but DO NOT LET THIS CONTINUE, you are being treated terribly and need to regain some self worth and confidence. That is not your fault but a result of the way you have been treated . Seek help as soon as possible or things will only get worse, do something about it now, today!!!.
2007-10-02 07:06:36 · answer #9 · answered by gdes_00 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Kitty, your man is not ready for any commitment and i think he is only using you cause he badly needed someone just like you. hitting you is never right... he is also overly jealous... while he is constantly flirting with other women.. come on girl, wake up! be true to yourself!
2007-10-02 07:01:14 · answer #10 · answered by rainydays 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should spend some time apart so that you can clear ur head. My advice is that you should stay away from him. If he had the nerve to hit you. He will be tempted to repeat it again. It seems to me that he isn't sure of what he wants.
2007-10-02 07:04:23 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋