joke:;;;;;;;;;;;;?

Question

Little Johnny's neighbors had a baby. Unfortunately, the baby was born without ears.
When mother and new baby came home from the hospital Johnny's family was invited over to see the baby.
Before they left their house, Little Johnny's dad had a talk with him and explained that the baby had no ears. His dad also told him that if he so much as mentioned anything about the baby's missing ears or even said the word ears he would be grounded for the rest of the month.
Little Johnny told his dad he understood
completely.
When Johnny looked in the crib he said, "What a beautiful baby."
The mother said, "Why, thank you, Little Johnny."
Johnny said, "He has beautiful little feet and
beautiful little hands, a cute little nose and really beautiful eyes."
"Can he see?" asked Little Johnny.
"Yes", the mother replied, "we are so thankful.
The Doctor said he will have 20/20 vision."
"That's great", said Little Johnny, "cuz he'd be
screwed if he needed glasses!"

Little Johnny comes crying to his Mother because his little sister pulled his hair.
"Don't be angry," his Mother says, "Your little sister doesn't realize that pulling hair hurts."
A short while later, there's more crying, and Little Johnny's Mother goes to investigate.
This time the sister is bawling and Little Johnny says...
"Now she knows!"

Two Arabs are chatting. One of them has his wallet out and is flipping through pictures.
"Yeah, this is my oldest. He's a martyr. Here's my second son. He's a martyr too."
There's a pause---
The second Arab says, wistfully, "Ah, they blow up so fast, don't they?"

Answer 1

pmsl
Going to have to take a walk for some fresh air?

Answer 2

That's good...i have 1 for you...

Pastor and the Donkey
A pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won.
> The pastor was so
> pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the
> race again, and it won
> again.
>
> The local newspaper read:
> 'PASTOR'S *** OUT FRONT'
>
> The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity
> that he ordered the
> pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.
>
> The next day, the local newspaper headline read:
> 'BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ***'
>
> This was too much for the bishop so he ordered the
> pastor to get rid of
> the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun
> in a nearby convent.
>
> The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the
> following headline the
> next day:
> 'NUN HAS BEST *** IN TOWN'
>
> The bishop fainted.
> He informed the nun that she would have to get rid
> of the donkey, so she
> sold it to a farmer for $10.
>
> The next day the paper read:
> 'NUN SELLS HER *** FOR $10'
>
> As a last resort the bishop ordered the nun to buy
> back the donkey and
> lead it to the plains where it could run wild.
>
> The next day the headlines read:
> 'NUN ANNOUNCES...HER *** IS WILD AND FREE'
>
> The bishop was buried the next day....
> The moral of the story is...being concerned about
> public opinion can
> bring you much grief and misery ...and even shorten
> your life.
> So be yourself and enjoy life.....
> Only worry about your own ***, not someone
> else's.....
> You'll be a lot happier and live longer.

Answer 3

I love little Johnny!

Answer 4

Average, it seems johnny was born in 1950 otherwise he have info about contact lenses//

Answer 5

Stop it, stop it, stop it! Please.
My sides still ache from the last Calamity cracker.
Have a star and give me 10 mins before another posting. LOL.

She's the best aint she?

Answer 6

Thumbs up.

Answer 7

Lmao these were awesome! Thx for the laughs, keep them coming. Star!

Answer 8

Hahahahahahaaa, true to form honey lmao

Answer 9

Haha.

Answer 10

Ha Ha.