I have a two year old daughter. She is soooo diffrent then when she was a year and half old. Of course, She's two... But she talks back, shes mean to her friends, She doesnt listen. I have tried spanking, and that just makes her more aggressive. She spanks her friends, and counts to 3 then yells at them. And I hear her yelling at her baby dolls like I yell at her some times. I tried putting her in time out,and she just keeps getting out, and it doesnt seem like it's worth the effort to fight with her about it. It's just getting out of hand. Any other suggestions??
2007-10-01 15:47:11 · 29 answers · asked by randi_jenik 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Wow! Sorry mom, you need to lay down the law, and quickly! If spanking and time outs do not work you are going to have to try more extreme options. Do you still have her crib? If so plop her butt in it for 2 mins, or until she calms down (like Supernanny) tell her when you put her in that when she is a good girl you will come get her, also tell her what behaviors you do not like. I.E. Mommy does not like it when you are mean to your friends, or mommy does not like it when you talk back. Another thing that works for me ( my almost 8 year old is ODD and thinks he can talk back and call me a B*TCH!) I pop him in the mouth not hard enough to bust a lip but enough to know that is unacceptable.
I also talk to my kids A LOT! Even my little girl (she is only 14 months), I explain what we are doing, why mommy is upset and what I need. And they really seem to respond well to this. Kind of like a little reminder bell - "oh yeah gotta be good mommy is trying to pay bills" (or whatever scenario). And I am sorry to say but she is 2! I mean they do not call it terrible two's for nothing. And what you are describing is pretty normal, they are little sponges and anything you say will be used against you! Lol.
Try to enjoy these years though because before you know it they will be ugh, gasp....teenagers!!! And forget about any communication or discipline, anything you do will be wrong. I really wish you luck, try to remember that they grow up quick and this phase will not be long lived. You will miss it soon enough.
2007-10-01 16:31:48 · answer #1 · answered by shannanm2783 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Terrible two's is not an excuse for everything. You cant give up on being the alpha in the household. Don't yell at your daughter for everything she may turn that same method on others. Maybe you should try positive reinforcement which basically means rewarding her every-time or every few times she does something good or goes without spanking other kids etc. When she is unruly you may have to show her she is child by taking things away. now don't get me wrong when a spanking is needed sometimes you have to but you cant for everything . Also if she keeps being mean to her friends show her that if she continues she may not have any and that could end very bad. So stay positive about the situation and try your best... Pray... if none of this helps try something else but stay strong shes only a toddler
2007-10-01 15:59:55 · answer #2 · answered by sdezzy711 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Children do what they learn. If you yell at them they are likely to see that this is acceptable. She is testing her boundaries, and you should be consistent with your method of correcting your child, if she sees that you won't waiver than she will eventually recognize that she will not be able to get away with it. If she is not staying put on her time outs I would place her back on the seat and state that if she does not behave, one of her toys will be taken away. Be serious about it. She will see it if you do not intend to follow through. Tell her that the toy will be given to a child that doesn't have many toys for example. Children understand more than you think, this is not a complicated thing for a child to comprehend. You just have to be firm, do not yell, if you are quiet and serious that has more impact on a child. It may take some time, but if you stick with it, she will be better for it. Is there any other influence that she may be picking up on that could cause her to act this way? Take a look around and see, if you eliminate that influence and replace it with a more positive one she should learn from it.
2007-10-01 16:02:40 · answer #3 · answered by point4m 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she is counting to 3 and then spanking her friends and yelling at them she must have learned that from you.
Suggestions:
1. Don't yell. You have trained her to only obey when you are yelling.
2. Don't count to 3. Say what you want her to do and give a light swat if she doesn't obey.
3. This requires zero anger. If you are angry, do not try teaching a child anything because it is useless. You are doing more harm than good.
2007-10-01 17:02:41 · answer #4 · answered by GrowingMama 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My daughter will be two next week and she became a different child literaly over night. No is her favorite word. She doesn't like anyone but me. Girls are very strong willed. Like everyone else said, try not to yell at her because she will think that is "okay" behavior. I think it is just a phase they go through so you have to learn to be patient. Remember, you are molding a little girl into one day becoming a woman. Treat her the way you feel she deserves to be treated. With respect.
Use reverse psycology on her and be nice to her. If she insists on being mean, walk away and ignore her bad behavior until she is ready to be nice.
Everything starts in the home!
2007-10-01 16:07:45 · answer #5 · answered by doeseverythinghappenforareason 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Instead of yelling (and I know that is just what happens), try whispering at her. Start by whispering her silly things or secrets so she will get the idea to listen to you. Then mix in discipline. You might be amazed at how well this works, and I wouldn't be surprised if she starts whispering to you too. Also, try putting whatever toy she is playing with in time out instead of her. We use a clear rubbermaid box so the kids can still see the toy, but can't have it back for a period of time.
2007-10-01 16:50:40 · answer #6 · answered by I know 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well I'm only a college student, but try a different punishment. Don't let her do the things she likes to do when she misbehaves. Take away time from daily activities, such as watching TV or playing with friends. Sure shes going to throw a temper-tantrum, but ignore it. I'm not sure if you let her watch violent shows on TV or if she does it herself but try and stop that, (if in fact that's the case). Also give her positive reinforcement when she behaves well. Try and balance the two, but focus more on the bad right now.
I taught violin to 1st-3rd graders. Sorry if I don't have enough experience to answer this!
2007-10-01 15:56:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No offences Miss but maybe she has some kind of a problem.
Have you seen your doctor about this?
It could get to become a real problem.
Get some help. O.K.
You said she is mean to her friends.
She does not listen to you.
You said that you have spanked her?
Can I ask how?
Over your knee on her bare bum?
Sorry asking that I am trying to help.
Then you go on and say Your daughter spanks her friends.
Pretty soon she won't have any friends period!!!
Get help for her. O.K.
Please write to; intercourse692@yahoo.com
Thanks.
Laurey.
2007-10-01 21:41:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's a book called "Making Children Mind Without Losing Yours"...I highly suggest it. Also another is "The Happiest Toddler On The Block" Two excellent reads. Try to set a good example, don't yell. try to redirect her if she gets in trouble with something.
2007-10-01 15:52:39 · answer #9 · answered by tigerbaby76 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you've tried the 1, 2, 3 method without any luck... I know this is going to sound like a commercial, but the read the book and try it the right way.
http://www.parentmagic.com/
Seriously, it's a great book and helps with exactly this type of thing. Worth every penny in my opinion.
2007-10-01 15:50:57 · answer #10 · answered by Crypt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋