Does spanking lead to domestic violence acceptance for girls when they grow up?

Question

I heard that when a child is spanked particularly a girl, that later leads her to accept domestic violence from her partner. If you can attach websites etc..to support your answers instead of personal opinion that would be great.

Thanks

Answer 1

I don't think your average run of the mill spanking is going to have that kind of extreme effect.

Being abused by a parent tends to lead to abusive relationships however.

what i HAVE noticed in preschoolers at least (i used to be a teacher) is that spanking at home leads to more violent reactions to conflict at school (hitting, biting, etc.)

Answer 2

I think it would depend on your definition of "spanking"

I am 27 got the random spanking until about 8 years old. And I would not tolerate domestic violence towards me at all. I get so angry when I see domestic violence.

My mother is from the baby boom generation, where you tend to find more people that were disciplined a little harsher with beatings and spankings, but my mother never had a problem with my dad and domestic violence. My dad is a very gentle and kind man.

It is women that grow up in houses with "domestic violence", physical or emotional, or verbal abuses that have a tendency to let domestic violence continue in their lives.

I do not believe really in spanking but there is a big difference in "spanking" and domestic violence.

Answer 3

It depends on the frequency and degree of spanking. The real issue is when does discipline become abuse. Spankings can be part of a pattern of abuse (physical or emotional) in extreme cases. Abused women are more likely to accept domestic violence and to abuse their own children. The issue isn't really the spankings...it's the whole abusive picture that causes the problem.

Sorry I can't provide any websites, but I do have a B.A. in Psychology and the general consensus seems to be that spanking isn't the most effective form of discipline but it isn't harmful unless taken to extremes.

Answer 4

I don't have time to search websites but I am a psychology major and can use what I have learned to answer this question. First of all, spanking when done in the right way will not lead to the acceptance of abuse later in life. Second there is no facts that can neither support or deny what you are asking, and any one who finds them went to a website that was anti spanking to get them. What can and will affect a child's acceptance of abuse later in life is the home. If a child is witness to an abusive relationship they will come to think it is the norm and be more accepting of it in their life. I must state this is not always the case but it is more likely that a child raised in an abusive environment will more likely accept it as an adult. Spanking when done the correct way, is never scaring to a child, contrary to popular belief. Good luck!

Answer 5

Everybody is looking to the world for solutions/advice and the world is lost. That is why many people are out of order and have to be accosted by authorities (police), because they didn't get trained at home or didn't take heed to the training.

You know what to do with your family to discipline and keep chaos out and peace in your home. The person that's looking in sure don't.
In the Word of God, Proverbs 3:11,12 says, " My child, do not despise the chastening of the Lord; neither be weary of correction: For who the Lord loves He corrects, even the parents in who delight in their children."
This means if you love your children, you don't want them to be a shame to you so correct them. Children appreciate a firm yet loving parent that punish and spank them in love for their future (very souls).
How will the child know when you are disappointed in her or you approve of her? She will know how to carry herself before people because you taught her right from wrong. This will not kill her. Abuse is something different and you should be able to tell the difference between the two. I am a mother of 10 (ten) children and they are well balanced and have not shamed me. I had to spank and punish but they are better for it. They raise up and call me blessed. The oldest is 25 and the youngest are twin girls, age 16. The older ones are always telling me they are proud to be my children because I loved them enough to steer them in the right way when they were little. They have become productive adults and they have good godly mates.
You try it and see it will pay off for you and your baby(s) I know you will make the right choices for your young. Let God be your guide. Go to church and take parenting classes.

Answer 6

I do not have websites to attach, however I was disciplined by being spanked as a child and it has not lead me to domestic violence. There is a difference in spanking and beating up on somebody. A LOT of kids these days, need that good ole fashion spanking good.

Answer 7

I was spanked as a child and it instilled fear in me, I never wanted to end up in an abusive relationship. I fell for someone with anger problems, but didn't realize the extent of his anger issues. I never just sat there and took it, I did my best to walk away. Had I had the resources and a no questions, no answers place to go, I probably would have left for good.

Answer 8

I have no hard evidence, but I have chatted with quite a number of women who were (some of them: severely) spanked when growing up and who were craving spankings as adults. But I would still think that that is a distinct minority. So many others (who also have posted on this site) abhor even the slightest amount of spanking just because they were physically abused when they were young.

Answer 9

I was in an abusive relationship, i was able to get out of it. However, i was NEVER spanked as a kid so i go against your theory. However, my home there was still ABUSE. My dad was and still is abusive, in the way of being controlling, emotional, verbally, psychiatrically. Abuse, whatever kid it is places a factor in why abuse is accepted...NOT spankings...spankings are spankings there discipline NOT abuse. I allowed my ex to have control because that is what I was used to...my dad having all the control, then it got to the point i "rebelled" and i stood up for myself, and thats when domestic abuse came into the picture. When you threaten an abusers control is when they abuse. They have a control issue and have to be in control at all times and if you stand up for yourself, or try to get control back is when you start having issues then it becomes a habit of how they let aggression out and keep the control. They hit to scare you so they have control...not because you did anything wrong and trying to show you that you past your line. I hit him back a couple times, one time is when he told me he got another girl preg....that was to show him that he screwed up...not to gain control or keep control of someone.

I guess what im trying to say is that true spankings are out of love and concern for a child, not to actually hurt them or scare them into being submissive. However abuse is out of anger and out of control in the hope of getting control and rather too much control. It doesn't matter what kind of abuse it is, the reason anyone accepts it is because that is what they are accustomed to. However they are accustomed to ABUSE...NOT DISCIPLINE!! So no spankings and domestic abuse doesn't have anything do with one another...Abuse of ANY SORT and domestic abuse...go HAND AND HAND!!

Answer 10

No it doesn't. At least not for my case. I wish I only got 'spanked' (equivalent of a smack or two for infraction). I was whipped into unconciousness many times in my childhood by a drunk father and beat black and blue and removed from my home into a foster family. (it was mortally dangerous for me to remain in my mother's house or my father's house) I have always ended a relationship for so much as an angry smack. My husband has never hit me, and we've been married for almost 13 years and have had our share of heated arguements.

It's all what YOU say is acceptable, not your past.

Answer 11

No. I was spanked as a child but if my husband ever laid a hand on me he'd be hurting badly!

I don't need a website to support my answer and it isn't personal opinion it's experience.