What should I Do About My Daughter?

Question

I have a daughter and she really doesn't listen. I have to tell her to do things over and over again. She's about to be three this month and I don't like to whip her, but because i'm not whipping her she's starting to talk back. I take things away from her for being disobedient and I have a 4 month old also, that cant get whippings, so when i whip her she thinks i'm being mean and i like the baby better than her. Any Advice?

Answer 1

Since you didn't mention her father should I assume he isn't around...yet you a a 4mth old...so???
Your daughter might be acting out of jealousy. I also have a 3 yr old daughter. I do not (fortunately) do not have a listing problem w/ her.
I can tell you though that as MOMs we cannot afford to worry if our kids 'like us or not' by the way we discipline. If your guidance and direction come from the heart & you know what you are doing is the right thing to do you cannot let their little tears and (at that time) emotional words hinder our quest to correct bad behavior.
I think your daughter is manipulation you. We have to be both disciplinary & nurturer.

Also, you can tell her (one time) that she is not a baby. And that she only gets spankings when she is being naughty. If she doesn't want spankings she better start listening...now! Also you can let her know that at this point in her life you don't care if she thinks you're mean because you love her anyway and that you will continue to correct her bad behavior.
I really believe that your daughter is challenging & testing your committment to her (opposed to the baby).

One more thing; consistancy is key!!!

Answer 2

You need to make sure your daughter is listening to you. You have to make her stand in front of you and look you in the eyes when you tell her to do something and then have her repeat it. Send her to do the task. If she does not do it then physically help her complete the task. Stand behind her and move her forward. If she falls limp hold on to her and drag her feet along the ground and make her complete the task. No hitting necessary. You must do this every time she doesn't do what she is told even if the 4 month yr old has to cry during the whole thing. As for the talking back I popped my son in the mouth with a flick from my finger and this stopped him. If you don't want to hit then grab her with one hand from under the chin and squeeze her mouth from the sides so she can't open her mouth. She'll get the message that she should not be talking to you like that..........I used these strategies on my son and never had to use 'time out'

Answer 3

My daughter is 2 she'll be 3 in Feb she has just started acting this way, but I have spanked her hard enough to where she knows I mean bussiness in the pass, so now all I have to do is say , "do you want me to beat your butt?" And she says no, puts on her little sad face, and hugs my leg.lol. Of course an hour later she's back to being a little terror, but the minute I say my favorite phrase she stops. Also I noticed just this pass weekend with my daughter, she acts terrible if I am not paying her any attention, so I've been trying to make sure that i pay her as much as attention I can.

Answer 4

Try instead of "whipping her" tell her honey you need to listen to mommy, when you do not listen mommy has to punish you. I would try putting her in the corner instead, not for long, just like 5 minutes 10 if it is more severe of an issue. She'll grow out of it, just make sure she knows that what she is doing is wrong. Other things that may work would be taking a way some of her tv time.

Answer 5

I have a 2 year old who sounds just like your daughter. He won't do anything I ask. Something I just started seems to be working the best. Take away the tv for alittle bit, or a toy, or something she really loves. And you can try putting her in time out. Ever time she does something good you need to praise her for it. She needs to see that you still love her and care about her. If she helps oput with the baby tell her how great of a big sister she is. You can sit them both down together and read to them. My kids love when I read to them. Also you can have color time so she can sit down quietly for awhile and then when she is done put her art work on the fridge and tell her how great it is. She just needs to see you do still care about her. She feels left out and wants more attention. I hope some of the tips helped.

Answer 6

Being consistent is key. Let your yes mean yes and your no mean no that will show your child you mean what you say. Let the time out chair be your tool for now. Don't accept disobedience without consequences she will get it in time set a limit as to how many times you will tell her to do something without consequences twice is my limit third time automatic time out or whatever punishment you chose.This works well but don't forget to give rewards too look for when they do something right then give a good girl big hug.

Answer 7

She's not even three years old and you're expecting her to act like an adult! No wonder she is starting to talk back, she is trying to tell you that she is only a baby and to stop treating her like you expect her to act like an adult! I don't blame her for talking back, her mother doesn't know how to parent! Obvously you don't have the intelligence to parent your children if you feel the need to resort to hitting them. You're hitting a baby (a toddler is STILL a baby) and all you are going to accomplish is teaching that baby that when you are angry or frustrated it is okay to hit. So when she starts school and there is a child who doesn't go along with what she wants she is going to hit and bite and kick and it will be your fault for teaching her how to hit. I suggest you take some parenting classes before you start hitting your other baby as well so that as the two of them get older they will be beating on themselves because that's what their parents taught them.

Answer 8

I guess putting her in time out wouldn't hurt. I really believe whipping them is the best answer. I don't mean beating them to death, just enough to get their attention. I got my butt whipped a lot when I was younger and hopefully it made me a better person. Parents are way to easy on children.

Answer 9

Find a firm tone in your voice, one with authority to it, and a no nonsense look in your eyes then the next time, look her in the eyes and say, 'You will not speak to me that way.' Then sit her on the couch or time-out and let her think about it.
Parents who develop this tone and look seem to have better luck with communicating with their children even as they grow.

Answer 10

It is just her age. Try putting her in time out. One minute for each year. I personally don't believe in physical punishment. Time out has always worked for us.