SO I've had this guy friend for over 8 years, and I fell HARD for him immediately upon meeting him , Like a dummy I confessed my feelings & broke down crying; but he gently told me that he wasnt ready for a relationship tho he thinks the world of me & i'm one of his best friends..
The thing is we dont get together very often at all (at his choice) but when we do he somehow manages to get me in a position where I'm um, intimately touching him, which I LOVE but Now let me say that altho this must sound slutty I am not like this with ANYONE else. We've known each other 8 years now & slept together twice (he was my 1st) which I hold very dear & I wouldnt change what happened because I STILL love him to bits & see i always will. Before u say hes using me, I gave him the opportunity for #3 & he turned it down saying he was hurt i'd think that was all he came over for, he even cried a little. Is the intimatcy his way of saying he loves me tho hes not ready for commitment
2007-10-01 04:38:10 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
A friend with benefits .... whats the problem as long as you are both having fun!
2007-10-01 04:44:03 · answer #1 · answered by steveheremd 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie- i was in this same exact situation. I had a best guy friend... a guy i could tell anything too and that i to this day love as a person. And although i know hes a good person- i think he took advantage of how i felt about him and we ended up doing like you guys.
I KNOW its really hard to face.. and its really easy to make excuses... but.. this guy is just using you. He knows how you feel.. and he lets you do this to him knowing perfeclty well that he doesnt want to be with you.
He may have feelings for you.. but.. your not worth him being with for one reason or anything. He wants "his cake and to eat it to." Meaning.. he probably feels something for you and finds you attractive and wants to get with you.. but doesnt want the committment.
I KNOW its hard to believe. It doesnt mean hes a bad person. but it does mean that hes doing the wrong thing here.
for YEARS i thought my guy friend would eventually change his tune and want to be with me.. and it never happened. But i let the sexual things go on for years hoping..
Finally last year i found a great guy who WANTS to be with me and treats me like a princess and im so happy that im over the guy friend. He is still my friend.. and i still love him dearly as a person.. but i accepted that there would never be anything more.
Lay down the line sweetie- you deserve better.
2007-10-01 04:47:02 · answer #2 · answered by la428282 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you're his girl on the side! He probably has someone else. I know it sounds hard, but you should move on if he doesn't want a relationship with you. It's not fair to do this to yourself.
Give him one more chance, ask him if he's interested in a relationship with you because you love him with all your heart but you don't want to be alone anymore. If he does love you, put him on the spot and he may step up!
2007-10-01 04:45:09 · answer #3 · answered by Temari 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay to give him a little taste. But shut off the faucet until he's ready to be responsible for his side of the relationship.
2007-10-01 04:44:59 · answer #4 · answered by nora22000 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you're being used...you're good enough to be his friend but not good enough to take the relationship to a higher level...that's wrong...you're better off finding a guy that will love you not as a friend...get out from under the dead wood and start looking for the right guy..he's not it..after 8yrs its time to move on...good luck!
2007-10-01 04:46:17 · answer #5 · answered by ♥ Infantry Wife ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is confusing i think he has mixed feelings not ready but at the same time he is ready
2007-10-01 04:43:51 · answer #6 · answered by kassy albano 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋