I live with my parents, as does my brother. Many months ago my brother asked if his fiancé could live with us for a time while he and she prepared to get a place of their own. I thought this was fine, as did my parents; however it's been about 8+ months and they've made no motions for the door and she hasn't had a job the whole time! I wouldn't be particularly bothered by this is she wasn't such an offensive creature to be about. She's vulgar, no good for my brother, a rotten add on to our family dynamic, and having her around lowers the quality of my life. Both my parents are EXTREMELY avoidant and don't want to deal with the situation... They also like having my brother and me around. She needs to leave. Now. Any ideas?
2007-09-30 22:48:46 · 14 answers · asked by Dan D. 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Gee, first thought: Move out and get your own pad...that way, you never have to worry that she's invading YOUR privacy in YOUR house, because you wouldn't let them move in, right!?
Once you're paying the bills, you get to call the shots; until then, you too are just a guest!!!
2007-09-30 22:52:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since this is your parents' house, it's up to them to approach your brother's fiance if they feel she needs to move. This isn't for you to get involved. My sister and her fiance lived at my parents' house and were planning on living there even after they got married until my parents said no. Realistically, both you and your brother should be living on your own, but you're choosing to still be dependant of your parents. What you can do is sit down with your brother and explain your unhappiness with his fiance regarding her vulgarness. If someone approaches her on her attitude maybe she'll start being a little nicer, or it might just motivate her to start looking for a place sooner than she wanted.
2007-10-01 01:51:06 · answer #2 · answered by 2Beagles 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start hinting. Loudly.
'Oh, look, here's a place for sale/rent that would just suit you. It's 500 kms away.'
'I don't know how Mum & Dad are going to manage to pay for a new car/my tuition/new washing machine. It's seems as though their living expenses have gone through the roof in the last, hmmm, must be 8 months or so.'
Point out to your brother that she was only meant to stay for a short time & you're all feeling cramped. DON'T tell him that you think she's a skank. It won't help.
Sell her into white slavery while no one else is looking. I'm sure you could do it if you tried.
2007-09-30 22:56:51 · answer #3 · answered by flossiedots 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your of age. . .Move!!
You can't change/fix other people. ie...your parents avoidance, your brother falling for a boor. Trying to do so, or broaching the subject at all will just stir up bad feelings and really ruin the "family dynamic". Time to get out on your own and create your own dynamic.
2007-09-30 22:55:56 · answer #4 · answered by 47 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is no other way for you than to leave. Possibly such a step could bring an end to your parents' avoidance - still better, wouldn't it be?
2007-09-30 22:55:03 · answer #5 · answered by Mirka 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound young. I would spend more time with decent friends, and other outside family members until she hits the road. Your parents don't want to lose contact with your brother. Mention to them that if they don't lay down some ground rules, you might not want to hang around so much.
2007-09-30 22:59:00 · answer #6 · answered by thinkaspell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This isn't your home and none of your business. Keep your opinions to yourself or get your own place.
Oh and by the way, few parents enjoys having their grown children living with them. You said it yourself, they are "extremely avoidant". You might want to think about that.
2007-10-01 01:48:59 · answer #7 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you doesn't want to live w/ them anymore,so it's time for you to move,buy a house or rent close to your job,then if you have something for them,give it,don't be affected by anyone especially w/ the members of the family,it's so irritated,if you can make your own solution,want to stay?don't let yourself affected,always keep silence,concentrate to your job,love your job,Our God'speedingraces upon to You to have a big patience...
2007-09-30 23:38:30 · answer #8 · answered by Alexischael 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
enable them to overhear you on the telephone asserting, "i understand I had an appointment with you to exterminate the mattress bugs, yet i've got have been given abode travelers now. i'm going to ought to get decrease back to you."
2016-11-06 22:13:29 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
having her there for that amount of time will take a legal eviction notice from the court house. Good luck
2007-09-30 22:52:54 · answer #10 · answered by cheri h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋