Okay i was talking to this guy and I asked him what he finds attractive in a women.he said "a woman who is well fit, take care of herself, nice slim body 'head strong', loves to have a good time but know when to be serious." and I asked him "do u really mean a nice slim body?" and he answered "yeah I do.I like to be with a woman who can turn heads and is in good shape" so I sat there for a while and thought about some of the girls he dated...and they were all over weight or obeast. so i asked him "well why are u so drawn to big women if you're SO attracted to the 'slim bodies'?" and his answer was out of this world. can't believe this guy. He said "b/c big women have low self-esteem and its easy to figure out what they wanna hear...if u tell them what they want to hear they'll do anything for u, so I take advantage of that..."
MEN and WOMEN is this true that some ppl date others with low self worth b/c they'll do anything to keep someone? Have u ever done this? Would u do this?
2007-09-30 15:43:08 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I think anyone whose main qualifications for a mate is what he/she looks like is pretty shallow. Frankly, the stereotype of men dating big women just so they can take advantage of them isn't always the case. I'm a big woman, and I love myself, and because I do, I have a husband who loves and respects me. Self esteem doesn't come from your appearence, it comes from valueing yourself as a human being. P.S. Your guy friend is a total tool for taking advantage of people that way. You should totally ditch him.
2007-09-30 18:35:38 · answer #1 · answered by missbeans 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Remember, Humans are animals too. They have instinct inside just like all the other animals. I am not speaking from experiance, I would not do that, but I would understand why and how someone would do that if you think about it. If a wild animal is looking for food, would he not take the weakest one? The easy target? Because that way he wouldn't have to work so hard at it. As far as guys go, I could see that happening. Someone is in need of something and figures it would be a pretty easy way to get what they wanted by telling the person exactly what they wanted to hear and get what they want then move on. My guess. I'm no expert, take what I say with a grain of salt. Good luck on your answer.
2007-09-30 15:54:06 · answer #2 · answered by mikeaaron_1999 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Anita makes a very good point. Skinny or trim women are just as likely to have low self-esteem as heavy women. Weight isn't the only cause for someone to have low self-esteem. It's your friend who has the self-esteem issues.
He IS a pig but his issues go even beyond whatever he's assuming is wrong with the women he uses.
2007-09-30 16:42:24 · answer #3 · answered by mamabunny 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
oh this is very true and quite obvious. People like to date other with low self-esteem because they can basically do anything they want and they would still be in the relationship. Women usually who have low self-esteem crave the need of a man and their attention so they are willing to overlook anything as long as they still get that love and attention Pyschology is a fascinating subject
2007-09-30 15:53:09 · answer #4 · answered by lila 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Where I live, I see black guys with girls who are Latina, White, Asian, and/or Polynesian. It seems acceptable around here, as it should be. btw, I am one of those girls (Polynesian and White) and my boyfriend isn't 100% black, he's part Hispanic. I'm not black though, and I'm not a guy either. So, I've never had this type of discussion with anyone. It seems silly. People should date and love whoever they want.
2016-04-06 21:53:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have heard of people dating someone with low self esteem because they will do anything to keep someone.
This guy is a jerk who uses people.
By the way, the word is "obese", not obeast.
2007-09-30 15:54:46 · answer #6 · answered by nowyouknow 7 · 5⤊ 1⤋
I had a workmate who was dating someone who could only be described as fat & ugly. He told me that she would never leave him - as she probably would never get anyone else.
He also said she ran around & waited hand & foot on him to keep him happy & more reason to stay with her.
He also said he never had to worry about anyone of his mates white anting him & taking her from him; never had to worry about her cheating on him.
He was being serious when he told me these reasons for dating this girl.
2007-09-30 18:15:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your friend is an idiot. There's plenty of skinny chicks out there with low self esteem too.
2007-09-30 16:00:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
Your friend sounds like a total loser.
For him to stereotype overweight women as having no self-esteem, yet he went on and date these women shows HIS lack of self-respect, as well as self-esteem.
2007-09-30 15:53:51 · answer #9 · answered by Lighthouse 6 · 6⤊ 1⤋
I have always been lucky enough to hold my weight to five lbs. under are five lbs over my weight goal...but I will have to say some of the best looking handsomest men I have ever seen has been with larger woman.
2007-09-30 15:50:35 · answer #10 · answered by Mustbe 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋