How can I keep my distractible 9 yr old on track?

Question

My 9 yr old daughter has always been very....spirited. She talks non stop and is easily distracted from simple tasks like brushing her teeth or getting dressed. It takes her forever to do the smallest task because she gets sidelined so many times. She may be borderline ADD but at this point I don't feel she needs medication as she does well in school.

What can I do to keep our school mornings running smoothly and keep her focused on the task at hand, besides yelling..."C'mon Summer, brush you teeth!" I get tired of repeating myself and she gets tired of me constantly badgering her to get done.

What can I do to help her??

All very helpful answers!! Thank you all very, very much.

she is definitely the type of kid who need a set schedule so we have been doing that since school started. 7 am rise and shine, 7-7:30 eat breakfast, 7:30 get dressed, etc.

I will try the sticker chart and research that caffiene advice! Thanks so much to all who answered.

Answer 1

Your daughter sounds just like me. It's probably ADHD (attention defecit disorder with hyperactivity), not just plain old ADD. I never needed medication either and got straight A's all through school. I did (and still do) have the talking issues and the getting distracted issues. I agree with the people who say that she needs to make lists of the things that need, but I would take it a step further. Come up with a morning routine. This means do things in the same order every morning. Wake-up, get dressed, eat breakfast, brush teeth,etc. Sit down with her and have her write it up. Then have her follow that order every day. She will get used to that system and find herself on a sort of auto-pilot where she does everything she's supposed to do while she is talking and doing whatever. It's also good to establish a timeline. By 7am you need to be dressed and down stairs, by 7:15am you should be done with breakfast and brushing your teeth (or whatever it needs to be). Get her a watch (I had a waterproof digital one that I never took off) so she can keep track of herself. I still do these things 20 years later. I always walk into a situation and make a list of what needs done and set up a loose timeline. I've learned to plan in a bit of extra time for a few minor distractions and can still get everything done.

(oh and from personal experience, if it's ADHD, like me, the caffeine is a BAD idea. ADD kids, I could totally see it helping, but oh my god, me and caffeine are a bad thing.)

Answer 2

I'm not a mother but an older sister(more like a mother really). My younger sister has ADD, and she's been that way as far as I can remember.

I think the chart+colorful stickers idea is nice, wish I had thought of it!
When I had to get Em's ready for school I had to constantly badger her into getting ready, stop talking and brush your teeth, etc.

One thing that worked well was keeping small treats that weren't sugar related on hand.(Those made it worse) Like stuffed animals, or key-chain pretty things for her backpack, etc. If she got done with time to spare before leaving the house, I'd help her decorate her backpack, or give her a new thing to decorate her room with.

I also would do things WITH her, like we would brush together, and being her older sister she wanted to do everything I did, so that worked out well.

But I'd say after reading the other answers, and what not, reward systems work wonders. However, in my experience I'd say sugar related rewards are a bad thing+ADD.

Answer 3

Make a list and let her put stars every time she finishes a chore. The stars add up to an afterschool treat.

Are you sure she's doing well in school? You might talk to her teacher, because a child who is this distractible in the morning must be causing a ruckus in the classroom.

I have a 17 yo son who was diagnosed ADD in 2nd grade. Meds have changed his life and he refuses to go to school without them. And your description of your daughter matches my son's word for word. He takes adderall as well as other medications for other conditions.

A natural remedy some moms with ADD kids use is to give them some caffiene in the morning. It helps the child concentrate--caffiene works backwards for our kids, it slows them down. That's why ADD meds are amphetamines--that slows them down, too. It was so funny, the other evening my son wanted to stay up late to get homework done. He drank a big glass of strong iced tea, and 10 min later he was passing out asleep.

I have heard of moms that give their children a cup of coffee before school, another at lunch, and it helps their kids focus enough that they didn't need ADD meds.

Take care!

TX Mom
not an expert

P.s. Love the name Summer! Very apropo.

Answer 4

Sounds like my 9 year old. I have made a chart for her to follow and if she completes the chart for the week I reward her with dinner of her choice, stay up an hour later, etc. It has worked great.
By the way I really thin it's part of the age.