I'm really curious, does anyone actually believe this?? I mean, I have read it given as a reason over and over and over and once upon a time believed it as a reason. Then I see my cousin-in law go 7 years and 2 children and then they got married, and I know others, just don't know specific details. Do you believe in this old addage, or do you think it has passed on with time?
2007-09-30 07:37:49 · 28 answers · asked by ocean's mommy 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
NO i don't believe it...i love cows and hate milk, so i would buy the cow just so i can pet it....which can kinda be interpertated into marraige because its not about what you get out of it, its what you share together, and the fact that you truely want to be with this person that keeps you going strong and urges you to make the commitment
2007-09-30 07:41:23 · answer #1 · answered by prplfae 6 · 7⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is so much more than a piece of paper. There is a common agreement between the two parties , where they have agreed to be committed to a life together. Complete with all the chaos of being with the same person for years, the fights, the goodtimes. Marriage can be wonderful.
I think that old addage is used commonly by young batchelors who ARE NOT ready to marry. When they are ready (well into their 30's) they wont feel that way any more about the owning the cow vs the free milk.
2007-09-30 14:47:13 · answer #2 · answered by dingydarla 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
No I dont believe it and it really pisses me off when self riteous people spout that to girls who are obviously hurting about not getting a proposal from their man. I am sure there are more constructive answers that can be given. Some women just spout that and think they are helping. Well it is not helping and it is just plain spiteful.
There are many reasons why some men dont propose. It doesnt mean they are not going to. It doesnt mean they dont love their ladies as much as some guy who proposes after a month....in fact the relationship that takes a while to get to the altar often is more successfull than the whirlwind romance, who rush to the altar.
Some guys are shy, some fear rejection, some just are not the marrying kind, some are happy with things they way they are....most of them dont realise how much it means to a girl to be proposed to and get married. Usually once they realise it tho, the ring goes on the finger.
People need to stop and think before spouting this old fashioned nonsense. It can be hurtful, and in my opinion is just being plain old spitefull. If you cant say something nice, dont say it.
I have been with my man for 4 years. We have lived together for 18 months. We are getting married next july and we will have lived together for 2 years by then.
Living together is a great way to get to know a person and find out if you are compatible, without having to go thru a wedding. We dont live in the 1950's any more.
2007-09-30 16:52:43 · answer #3 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
This is true but there are some add'l layers to this-because a man may buy the cow after getting the milk for free but it may not last for of the same reason
My aunt's 1st marr. is an example-8yrs, 3 kids plus 1 from her prev. relationship, marriage didn't last 2 yrs. he turned into a psycho after "i do". He wasn't an honest person and he had some anti-social behav.-enjoyed insulting ppl.
It's an addage that still applies, sex w/out marriage is nice but even when it's only casual presents problems. I think a man & woman's focus about their significant others true personality & nature is clouded by pre-marital sex, sometimes ppl ignore the more important aspects of their relationship which are terribly flawed just because the sex is good, great or out of this world, then make the mistake of marrying one another.
I think that if a man truly wants to be w/ me, loves the person I am and can deal w/ my faults/flaws then he should also make a commitment instead of just wanting to enjoy the privilege of having sex w/ me & as many other women who'll have it w/ him. Maybe marriage will come later if it crosses the man's mind but what woman can rely on that occuring?
2007-09-30 15:05:40 · answer #4 · answered by BklynNative 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I don't believe it in all cases, but it seems many guys get the idea that, we're already living like a married couple, so why bother? If they each maintained separate residences, that just wouldn't come up. If you read the marriage and divorce section, you see this come up as a question on a daily basis, so yes, there is def something to it. What I always wonder is about the woman--if she'd only be happy living with the man as husband and wife, why would she move in with him without the engagement, at bare minimum?
2007-09-30 14:50:18 · answer #5 · answered by melouofs 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it has passed, I went to live with my ex-husband without getting marry, we lived together for 2 years after that we decided to get marry, but the true it was the same thing I didn't care, he wanted to do it, so we did it, I think that is only an action we do for the other to see, Our social life is always judging what we do everyday, People care so much about what others think. When someone say this I don't like it I feel, that man are buying us and the price they pay for us is marriage, If a man has true feelings for a woman even if he lived with her for 4 years, if they still in love I believe they will get marry eventually, maybe they want to make sure they can live together before they do it.
2007-09-30 14:48:14 · answer #6 · answered by MARY 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
I don't like this saying because I am not a cow and I don't sell milk or give milk away. I think it's a terrible metaphor for a woman. That being said, I believe that sex outside of marriage is a mistake, and that time has not and will not ever change this. I could go on and on why I believe this, but I'll just say that I respect myself and I respect marriage and family and children, and sex inside of marriage honors what I care about the most.
2007-09-30 14:44:04 · answer #7 · answered by No Shortage 7 · 9⤊ 0⤋
It is a metaphor that has become more awkward with time. When I was a kid, my mom said this to me, and I replied "What if the man falls in love with the cow?" I took it a bit literally, I guess!
If all marriage means to a guy is sex, then it is apt. If all being with someone means to him is getting his meals cooked and his laundry done, it is apt then too.
We have heard of the couples living together 10 years, 3 kids; the girl saying this suits her just fine, and then...
...her guy leaves her, and MARRIES a girl he has known for 3 months!!!
2007-09-30 16:58:09 · answer #8 · answered by danashelchan 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Marriage has benefits other than sex. If that was the only reason to get married, sure, the adage would hold true. But there are legal benefits--such as inheritance or having the right to decide what happens to your loved one in an emergency. There's also the part about celebrating your love with family.
2007-09-30 14:49:09 · answer #9 · answered by flirty_smurf 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Actually I do believe this metaphor is relatively accurate. The milk isn't only sex, but everything that comes with marriage. I truly believe that giving a little taste of things to come is a wise thing, but to give away the dairy without purchase is stupid.
As someone else said. Just look at the questions on this forum from women who are crying that their BF of 10 years (more or less) won't marry them. "What do I do?" "Why won't he marry me?" "Am I not good enough?"
2007-09-30 15:39:58 · answer #10 · answered by Poppet 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋