ok so my dad dies when i was about 9 and ever since then it has just been me and my mom living together. im a teenager so of course im going to talk back to my mom but i do do it all the time. evyertime i have a friend over i tell her to go away and i can't even explain it but im always soo mean. my mom always tells me how i make her cry and how i nbeed to stop being soo mean and im completly runing my relagionship w/ my mom. im not mean to anyone else but when it come to my mom i justr can't controll wat i say. i really need soe help before something happens that will ruin my life.
2007-09-30 04:40:36 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i thin k u should sit down and talk to her about it....trell her how it makes u feel and that u know ur reactions and statements are wrong but that u just can't control it....tell her that u dont mean to make her feel the way she does......just tell her everything u told us....she will appreciate the fact that u came to her about it..
2007-09-30 04:49:18 · answer #1 · answered by Pixie311 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It must have been traumatic to lose your father when you were just a child. And perhaps somewhere deep inside you you're afraid you might lose your mother too. How scary is that!! And if you can convince yourself you don't need her by being so hateful and mean to her, maybe...just maybe...if she did die, you wouldn't hurt as badly as if the two of you had been very close. And another thing to think about...how many people would still love you if you treated them the way you treat your mom? But if you feel all this anger inside you and need to vent it, your mom will still love you no matter how you treat her so you see her as a safe place to let go of all the frustration that's in you.
It's not too late to turn things around, you know. Your mom is still there for you. Can you just sit down and tell her how sorry you are for making her cry? Can you tell her how much you love her and how you want to change the way you treat her to show her how much you really do care? Can you ask your mom to tell you when you hurt her feelings so the two of you can work through the problem together?
I hear the pain you have and know that you're trying to become more mature and caring. You can turn this relationship around. My daughter hated me and everything around me when she was a teenager. Today, she's a wife and mother of six and my very best friend. If she changed, I know you can. Good luck and God bless.
2007-09-30 04:56:43 · answer #2 · answered by missingora 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is not much you can do if your mother is this disrespectful towards you. All I can say is that do not take it to heart, even though she is your mother and I am sure you are seeking her love and blessing. That said though, if your mother is this big of a dink, just ignore her comments. Confide in your friends, and other adults that are understanding. Do you have family that you can talk to such as an Aunt? Easier said then done, but she is trying to shape you into a person she thinks you should be, while you are being the person that you are. She should understand this, and offer advice and encouragement. Not slander and insults. So for the time being just ignore her, and give her space. Maybe she will come around. If nothing else she will then maybe have a real heart to heart talk with you, and try to understand you better.
2016-05-17 09:13:52 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first stop bringing people over that you feel you need to be rude around.
second you need to start spending some good time with your mom before you lose a good friend and counselor.
however I think you have two problems first I think you are scared of getting to close or dependent on your mother maybe you think you will lose her too.
and second if you keep treating her this way you will lose her heart for you.
My mother was my champion my guide and as I got older my best friend. She was never shy on advise or telling me no but she always saw me through.
I did lose my mother when I was 25 and at the same time I lost my dad (he went absolutely nuts without my mom) I miss my mother almost every day, but I am able to look back on my last memories with great joy and happiness to know that we had a great time. Do not let fear of losing another parent you keep you from being Family with the parent you have.
Hope you learn to treat the person who loves you and has worked hard for you with some respect and a lot of love.
2007-09-30 05:00:40 · answer #4 · answered by Blessed Rain 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I use to do exactly that. I couldn't control what I'd say. When we get into arguments I say horrible things just to hurt her. She doesn't show it but I think I hit hard sometimes. I just can't agree to wrong things sometimes she says things that are no where close to bing right and I give her this whole attitude and talk back for hrs. I knew I had to stop so every time I'm around her I think before I open my mouth, its hard, but if you're patient you'll gain self-control and then you can deal with everything she says even if it annoys you take it and just agree with her, or tell her how you feel in a low calm voice.
Don't be selfish, its your mom shes been dealing with you for your whole life, think about how she feels.
=] good luck!
2007-09-30 05:53:34 · answer #5 · answered by Istis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You always hurt the ones you love. You can control it. You have some serious issues but you are looking for ways to get it under control. So get some help dealing with your anger thats what the problem is. Getting some help now will allow to have a real bond with your mother. I maybe wrong but it seems to me that you are mad with the parent thats not there. All you can do is be mad with the one that is there. Good luck.
2007-09-30 04:49:59 · answer #6 · answered by Miki M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You obviously love your Mom. I did the same thing as a teen. I lost my Mom 4 years ago (when I was 38) and I still feel guilty for it. I wish I told her more of how much my heroe she was. Maybe just stop yourself fom speaking, think 1st, then speak. Make sure you listen closely to what you have said, and know how you would feel if it were said to you.
2007-09-30 07:50:20 · answer #7 · answered by DesignDiva1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How selfish, your worried about ruining your life while your ruining Moms. Bad girl. Before opening your mouth to make Mom/s life hell, ****THINK**** it's that simple. If you have a child, how would you like that child to treat you? And not all teens talk back to their parents. I feel so bad for your Mom I want to cry, please don't do this to Mom.
God bless.
2007-09-30 05:05:34 · answer #8 · answered by luvspace 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I cant understand why teens feel its OK disrespect there moms. You can control what you say.At least you want to change your ways.Find some classes to help you and your mend your relationship.Right now my son needs anger management. He has said hurtful things to me. He too recognizes his bad behavior.That's the first step.Now you need to go to your mom and hug her and tell her that you want to change.Good luck.
2007-09-30 06:06:41 · answer #9 · answered by speedy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you are ANGRY..you lost your dad...of course you are HURTING..you lost your dad...so you take it out on the one person you really have left to love(it's an old saying..but we always hurt the ones we love) Just by asking this question you are well on your way to resolving your problem. Keep reminding mom how much you love her..you just hurt. She is hurting just as much. She lost the love of her life..her soul mate..the father of her child..her help mate...at the moment she is totally lost and YOU are all she has to hold onto. You are a sensitive loving young woman and I feel proud of you for asking for help. God bless you..you beautiful beautiful person.
2007-09-30 05:01:45 · answer #10 · answered by Becky B 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋