Parents what do I do?

Question

the 3 of us me and my parents have just had a major bust up, and my mother will not speak to me and my dad is not speaking to my mother, she is even refusing to come on holiday with us in november. That doesn't matter, but she nags and she nags all the time never stop she has even stopped cooking meals I have had to do the cooking and the washing, when she leaves for work it is 6.45am and when she gets in it is 18.15pm she slams doors, she bangs everything she does allsorts.

We are tired of telling her to stop banging doors anyone can help me to pull this family back together before something else major happens,

Today it was over a peace of meat that it had gone into early she has always told me to put it in at 14.30pm everytime I have cooked a dinner and now she has said it was far too early cos it is a little peace of meat!!!!!!!!!ANYONE HELP

Maybe we could help her abit more around the house but she is 64 and I don't think she is going thru the menopause.

She says there is a carton on the floor and there ain't she will just pick at the slightest thing.

Like now I have just hung out the washing and she was struggling to pull over a plant pot I offered to help her and she said NO cos she din't want me to help her I don't know what else she wants us to do apart from helping her around the house more.

She is bearly speaking to the pair of us and it is a nonsense on what she is doing she is saying my dad will not take her out on the weekend coshe is working , she even says that me and her go out on a saturdady and thats all I have offered to go out with her on the sunday aswell, but she just won't budge.

What more can I do!!!!!!!! She has even told everyone all her mates in work my auntie and my cousins that I don't do anything around the house and I do the cooking washing!!!!! I don't know what to do to.

Answer 1

Family counseling.

Answer 2

You have to take everything into account when thinking what to do with this situation,
Shes 64 and leaves for work at 6.45pm every morning? Thats tough going at 64. I just do that once a week and next day im wrecked from it and im just 21. I bet she didnt imagine at 64 she'd be getting up at the crack of dawn to go to work and then not be home til late evening.
You also mentioned that shes stopped doing the cooking and cleaning? If she had to cook and clean and work outside the home without any help from her children and husband no wonder shes going mad. If you do help her thats all good and well but i can fully understand why she'd be angry if you didnt.

Not being on speaking terms with you and your family is a bit much. Id say just sit her down on her day off and have a long talk out. Maybe do a rota where each family member has a certain day to cook and clean on. And stick to it.
Good luck

Answer 3

If it has been like that for a long time than -- what happened to change the normal happy family?

If it has been like that on and off over a very long time than that is saying enough is enough.

Why are you living at home if you are not a child that is?

Mom is working too hard too long and maybe on purpose just to get away from the home.

You do sincerely care it sounds like, so I hope she will confide in you but she seems very angry and likely to lash out as people do when trapped in unhappy situations often lead to lengthy period of disharmony and/or break-up.

Your dad and mum need to work it out, she needs to speak up.

You should hang out with your own friends and think about your own future family, parents sort it out just make sure you get involved if there is violence that is not tolerable.

Answer 4

Sounds like your mum is very unhappy, could be her age, you know, menopause. She does have a very long day, perhaps you aren't all helping enough or at least she feels you aren't. Try to sit down and talk to her, if she seems irrational then it does sound like the menopause. It's a very strange feeling, you don't want to be horrible but everything just drives you mad. Pick a time when she seems calm, make her a coffee and sit down for a chat. Don't start with 'you're always .......' go for 'Are you feeling alright because you seem very unhappy'.
Good luck, don't condemn mum she could be feeling really terrible.

Answer 5

First of all, how old are you? By your pics you look to be in your 40's, why are you still living at home? Can't get a job? Can't go to school and get a good job? What's up with still living at home with mommy and daddy? Move out and on with your life. I did that in my 20's and never looked back and feel free from my parents.

Answer 6

Your mom might be going through a rough time and is taking it out on you and your dad. Not speaking to each other makes it worse. Communication and listening is key to any healthy relationship. Also, I agree with the person that said family counselng.

Answer 7

Hehehehehe well 2 mans in house!
Never thought that you and your father should help sometimes mother to clean or coock?
Its not just her job to do all this!
You bouth wount die if will lurn coocking or cleaning house! :)
Give her rest and be more sweet and understanding and ignore doors banging,its kinda childish thing to show anger and make others to pay attention!!
Soon she will calm down!

Answer 8

maybe because of your tradgic breakup you need to spend a few months without your mom. Chances are that she is feeling because she is alone that she can take you for granted while she just mopes.. after a few months c if she is any calmer and if she isnt then tell her that you dont want to b near her again.

Answer 9

women are wacky when going thru menopause
they lose estrogen and their testosterone increases. they get chin hair and grow grapefruits as far as vicious fighting is concerned... STAY AWAY FROM HER and all will be well..

Answer 10

Get away from the nutcase as soon as you can and don't get caught up in the drama. Leave her alone, but make sure you tell her every once in a while that she is a nutcase. Get away and don't get drawn in, because that's exactly what she wants.