My boyfriend and I plan on getting engaged and then married sometime in the near future, but we're trying to get our stuff together(school, insurance, finances, etc.). Everyone we're close to keeps nagging us about when we're gonna get engaged(by everyone I mean his parents and my parents, our siblings, friends, EVERYONE!!!!). His mom even went so far as to look up engagement rings online, without telling him(he caught her doing it), and my mom even went as far as pulling her veil out of storage to see if I'd like it. There's so much that we have to get together before we could get engaged, we're ready to get married, we are just too broke to actually get married. I've told my family, friends, etc., to stop bothering me about it, that it will happen when it happens, and he's done the same thing, but they still bother us about it. What can we say or do to get them to stop nagging us? Is there anything we can do, is there a solution at all?
2007-09-29 19:06:02 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Have a fake fight and a fake break up and have the fight be over all the interference. Do it in front of the ones nagging you. Then wait a week or 2 and make up. Maybe that will scare them into backing off.
2007-09-29 19:18:47 · answer #1 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 3⤊ 6⤋
If they are being rude about it, you could always be rude back. When they ask about your wedding ask them "so when you going to die?" then, after their look of shock, mention that you are sick and tired of hearing everyone nag about you both getting married and that there are other things you want to get out of the way before planning one.
Thank them for the offers of seeing the veil or looking at engagement rings, but tell them that when you are ready you and your groom will be choosing and planning.
2007-09-30 02:59:48 · answer #2 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So it sounds like you and your boyfriend are the ones acting like the mature adults here and your parents are falling prey to the romanticism of the thought. How backwards is that?
I think you need to put a time limit on when you think it will even happen like the previous poster said. Tell them that you guys won't even consider it until such and such month/year, and that you don't want to talk about it anymore. Any time they bring up the subject, you change it. Any time your mother or his mother takes something out of the closet or bring out the magazines, you say "yeah that's nice...so any way did you hear about how high gas prices are going up?". You just have to act uninterested and aloof whenever some one brings it up. I'm surprised that no one who has a close relationship with you two is practicing some boundaries here...do you guys live in the BFE of Alabama or something?
2007-09-29 19:48:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are your parents paying for the wedding or are you? If they are then you aren't too broke to get married. Why can't you get things together as an engaged or married couple? You will never have everything together, life is a work in progress and something new is always coming up.
2007-09-30 07:12:33 · answer #4 · answered by Luv2Answer 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Have a fake fight and a fake break up and have the fight be over all the interference. Do it in front of the ones nagging you.Then wait a week or two and make up. Maybe that will scare them into backing off
2007-10-03 19:08:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, they probably mean well & don't really realize how it's bugging you. I know you told them but still, They are just excited & want to get to planning, I'm sure!
There may not really be a way to get them to stop. You could go really drastic & tell them that if they bug you they won't get to be in on the details when you do get engaged. Don't know if you want to go that far though.?
2007-09-30 17:25:42 · answer #6 · answered by valschmal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u love someone no mount of money will keep u form marring him right now but in u situation tell them that if u r not going to pay 4 the wedding or buy us a new home to live in then bag out now and then put ur foot down but if they pay for everything i say set date as fast as u can
2007-10-03 19:07:00 · answer #7 · answered by mama 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just ignore them maybe when they hassle you. All you can do is just keep saying 'we will in our own time, when we want and no one is gonna make us hurry up'. If they're all so hoping for you to get engaged, just say to them, 'if people keep on nagging us, we are just going to put it off for longer'. That might shut them up.
2007-09-29 23:39:41 · answer #8 · answered by BTB2211 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Nahhh, 3 yrs is WAAY tooo long to be puttin up wit all that rubbish! Honestly u need to one day be a as upfront as possible even if it sounds RUDE! Tell her with a strong voice and a straight face to DEAL WITH IT if she is critising ur work then tell her, "Go tell sum1 else who cares, alright buddy!?" then ignore her! She has no right to treat u like a slave!
2016-04-06 07:52:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could try telling them that you don't intend to get engaged until 2009 and you're not ready to start even thinking about it yet. Then if you do it sooner, they'll all be pleasantly surprised.
2007-09-29 19:13:04 · answer #10 · answered by Katkin 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Say "We're tired of people asking. When we're ready, we'll make an announcement." Say this every time, over and over, even if you sound like a broken record. They'll get it eventually.
2007-09-29 19:12:01 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋