Earlier in the year, when I stepped up to put together our ten year high school reunion with two others, I put down about $500 of my own money for a deposit for a club, based on the number of RSVPs we had already received, and we planned to pay me back as people started PAYING for their tickets.
Almost no one sent in money.
We were able to put together a smaller reunion, which was tonight, at a local restaurant, but we lost the deposit at the club we had previously booked.
One of the other committee members got up in front of the group while we were passing out thanks to everyone who helped, and told everyone how much money I was out, and asked people to donate to help pay me back.
I SWEAR, I didn't ask her to do that, and I didn't know she was going to. I'm worried now that everyone will think that it was me who was asking for it.
$75 was collected. Would you have been offended? Should I keep it?
2007-09-29 18:17:19 · 22 answers · asked by CrazyChick 7 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Joe: What the hell???
Not one comment in the entire question about my weight, or wanting to prove to my former classmates that I can be thin.
Read the question, because what you said is SO much more offensive than anything that actually was an issue with this reunion.
2007-09-29 18:35:39 · update #1
Sorry, I should have been clearer.
I'm not offended, really. You're right, the word for how I felt was embarrassed.
I'm worried the other people would be offended that it looked like I was basically panhandling at the high school reunion.
2007-09-29 18:37:00 · update #2
why should you be out of pocket more than already what you are.
I say keep it. She probably put herself in your shoes realising how out of pocket you are. that's a sweet guesture from your friend.
2007-09-29 18:25:15 · answer #1 · answered by Ollie J 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should just keep the money. I am sure that there is a way that you can write off the money that you put out at the end of the year as a donation or what not (you would have to talk to a tax pro, but I think that there is something that you can do with it.). As for the reunion class, I would send out a a general letter thanking everyone for attending, and thanking (no names or direct referances) those that helped with the cost of the reunion.
2007-09-29 18:26:18 · answer #2 · answered by PaganAndProud 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Boy, I wish I would have been able to advise you NOT to put down your own money. I went through something similar for my 10 year reuinion. Luckily, I found out from the school board that they had about $550 of our CLASS money from when we were in High School. I don't even know where it came from in the first place. So when the same thing happened to me, I lost the $100 that I put down for a deposit, and we moved ours to the Fox & Hound. I spent the rest of the $400 on drinks and food and games for everyone. Once the money was gone or I left, everyone was on their own. When I settled the tab on the way out, we had $40 left over. So, if we ever have another reuinion, people will have to pay up-front, or we will have to go some place where I can put down $40. I sure as heck wouldn't put my own money down!
But don't be offended or embarrassed. Your friend was trying to help you out and everyone should have contributed.
2007-10-01 02:12:08 · answer #3 · answered by Proud Momma 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You should not feel offended and you should definitely keep the $75.00 that was collected. You are still out $425.00 of
your own money. Unfortunately, you learned a lesson about using your own money upfront without a guarantee of re-payment.
If it had been me, I wouldn't have asked for any money for re-payment either but I would have kicked myself for being so naive and probably suggested that an additional $5.00 or $10.00 be added onto the cost of the re-union so I could recoup some of my money.
I personally think that the other committee member who asked for contributions for you was just asking on your behalf and trying to be helpful. I'm sure the others knew of her intentions to help you out.
2007-09-29 18:38:31 · answer #4 · answered by chansenfam@sbcglobal.net 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
On a scale of one to ten....it's a Zero! I'm sure your friends would understand, and think nothing of it...as for the others, who cares? That's vanity.
In the big picture of life, is it really that bothersome that someone "might" think you're cheap? I mean really, they should already have a vision of you by your prior actions...this shouldn't/wouldn't reflect poorly on you (as if you're really cheap) if your prior history of actions have proven differently.
As for your friend whom mentioned it to everyone, maybe she mentioned it because she really cared, and wanted to help.
I'd let this one go...(both the money & the worry)
Focus more on the positives that should/could come out of a reunion, which is what they're really for: the "reunion" of long lost friends, hopefully recontacting with good people you'd lost contact with in the past, etc.
2007-09-29 18:38:35 · answer #5 · answered by RacerX 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not offensive at all! Who do they think you are? A philanthropist for their social lives?
What an aggravating experience for you. Kudos for going tonight and having a good time (hopefully)after dealing with poor follow-through by your fellow alums and paying $500 for the privilege. Keep the money. Hopefully it was collected from folks who didn't pay for their tickets in the first place. Enjoy the rest of your weekend and don't worry about this any more!
2007-09-29 18:35:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Stop worrying, keep the money, and yes I would be offended as were the donators - NOT by you or your thoughtful friend but by the rudeness of those who RSVP'd and encouraged the expense but neither came nor paid for their commitment.
Sadly, this is why deposits with RSVPs are a good idea.
2007-09-29 18:34:49 · answer #7 · answered by SC 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If I read this correctly, you were "offended" because of the possibility that people might think that you asked her to ask for money back. I'm guessing a better word for how you felt was embarrassed. But either way, there is no reason to feel either of these emotions because you didn't ask her to do it; she did it completely of her own accord, and I agree that it was a nice gesture on her part. I think you should keep the money. And as for the potential that people might think you put her up to it... if they do, it's their problem.
2007-09-29 18:32:52 · answer #8 · answered by drshorty 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Keep it, don't be offended, and perhaps others will chip in later when they have some money. Perhaps you've learned a lesson that someday may save you more than $425. I am sorry for your loss, but this is how people are basically. Don't hold a grudge, consider that a charity donation.
2007-09-29 18:33:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'd be offended that the pricks only came up with 75 bucks. Your friend, however; should have waited until you left to go to the bathroom, before she announced it to your exclassmates.
Sorry you were ripped. Next time, obviously, make sure people pay ahead of time.
Yes, keep the money. Absolutely
2007-09-29 18:27:47 · answer #10 · answered by Proud Mama of 4 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
LOL!! staggering humorous, and that i'm no longer racist, yet nonetheless... xD On a scale of one to 10, i might say... i do no longer be attentive to, 6? because of the fact I enjoyed it, yet i assume absolutely everyone on the different edge of the political argument(race aside) might locate it extraordinarily offensive
2016-12-14 03:52:46 · answer #11 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋