God has put on my heart something i dont want to do?

Question

hey everyone. i hope youre all having a good weekend. I have been upset lately about something. So far being a Christian has been pretty easy, but its begining to get tougher. God has recently put something on my heart to share with others that i dont want to do. i once was caught in filthy sin that i felt i couldnt get out of alone, so i looked to God. He totally purified me and helped me to repent. He took an unclean person and made her clean. Naturally, i want to repay Him for what He's done for me. The problem is I am very embarassed of what i once was and dont feel comfortable exploiting myself. i want to be a Christian so badly and I fear that i am sinning, and unable to repent because i will never bring myself to do what God wants. I wish God's will was easier. I mean, I know that God's will doesnt always agree with ours, but how do i get myself to do God's will. How can i come closer to Him without doing this. And I know God's plan is to prosper us... (continued in details...)

but why cant i just trust that? do i really not have that much faith? i see everywhere people asking God what He wants them to do. But noone ever saying what He wants them to do is scary for them, like i feel. please help me. Thank you and God bless you.

Kristin

when i say exploit i mean show my sins.

and also, what God has done for me may help others believe in Him, which is what we were all sent on this Earth to do, spread His word.

Answer 1

God doesn't ever give us more then we can handle..He obviously knows that you can do this.

Answer 2

Are you going to keep someone from their salvation and having the same purifying experience you had because of your own drawbacks? Jesus told the disciples that they had freely received and they should freely give (Mt. 10:8). God has freely given you salvation and grace. Now, you share the knowledge of Him. Believe me, I've experienced the same thing. At the beginning of the summer, I decided to truly give my heart to God and ever since, He's done nothing, but change and make me wholly His. Things I wouldn't have said about God or my relationship with Him, things I wouldn't have done or felt, have all become beautiful realities, thanks to Him.

I feel like God is going to send me out into the mission field, kind of like Paul, in a few years. At the beginning of this summer, I would've, and I think actually did, have a hard time with that. I was very selfish (still am a little) and didn't want to do all that. I wanted a traditional life with a traditional career where everything was comfortable and I could make my own plans. However, He began to show me that that's not what He intends. As I've grown to know Him, He's given me a heart, a PASSION for His ways, His desires. Now, I'm so entirely eager to go out and spread His truth. Sometimes, I feel like it's just burning on the inside and I want to go out and start right now, going when and where He wants. However, He's preparing me, and now, though I don't want to, I have to sit and wait for the preparation. I know it's best and it's what He would have for me to be used of Him effectively.

Know that what He wants for you is best. Know that if He's truly putting this on your heart that you wants you to grow in faith and He wants others to come to Him. Don't hold them back from their salvation. We all have pasts that aren't pleasing. Yes, I too am rather ashamed, but He's made me pure. Think. Other people are living the life you used to live. People look down on them because of it. They become hard because if nobody on earth cares, why should a God who "may not even exist" care? No, realize that they, too, need someone who understands, who has been through the same lifestyle. Show them there's a God who loves, who cares, who forgives if only they would run to Him.

I pray you answer His call.

Answer 3

KRISTIN,
If I was in your position and felt like God wanted me to give your testimony, I would first sit down and start writing in a journal ...put it down on paper first.

This will enable you to be able to go over it and reread to correct or change anything that you might feel like you should not share. It may take overnight or it might take longer.

This may turn out to be a great book to encourage others and by the time you finish the writings, you will be able to look back on it and see where God has given you the wisdom on how and what to say. You may be more comfortable with that.

I see a lot of those that God has touched their lives, and they write books about it.

Do you remember David Wilkerson and how he converted a gang member? This gang member has written several books that are really helpful. The names of the books are Run Baby Run and Run Devil Run.

Paul the apostle wrote quite a story to Philemon regarding his runaway slave. Paul asked Philemon a favor. Onesimus had run away, right into Paul. Well, Paul got him saved and sent him back to Philemon and asked him if he would now treat him not as a slave any longer, but treat him as a brother.

Paul told Philemon now if Onesimus owes you anything lay it to my charge.

Isn't that precious.? I know you will do ok. blessings

Answer 4

Kristin,
When you say "show your sins" are you talking about giving your testimony? There is a difference between glorifying sin and talking about how God saved you from it...and giving Him the glory. Revelation 12:11 says that "they overcame by the blood of the Lamb and by the WORD OF THEIR TESTIMONY." When you tell people what God has done in your life and you are very specific....that is a witness for God. No one can argue with you because only YOU know what you have been through and how God has helped you. You never know what lives you may touch when you do that. It is embarrassing sometime and makes you feel vulnerable...but that is why it works. People SEE that it is REAL....because you have emotion about it. I gave a testimony the other day....it was difficult. But, because of that...I was able to talk to some people who were also having a problem related to this. Here is the question my testimony was on.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AkKudCwpD7AIHUw52jNTuMvty6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20070926153612AAkMXnx&show=7#profile-info-tpl32xaUaa

This still was not easy to share as it is something I do not like about my past....but God has forgiven me and allowed me help others. Here is a promise for you to claim when you are feeling you cannot do what God asks you to do.
" My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinth. 12:9
I will pray for you to be strong with God's help and to do His will in your life. Email me if you would like to talk.


† On-call Prayer Warrior †

Answer 5

There is no need to exploit yourself - God wouldn't want you to. When you asked for forgiveness, He forgave you. The Bible says He no longer sees your sin. You can witness (because thats what you should be doing) to others without going into personal details. He doesn't want to embarrass you. However, you may meet someone who is in the same situation you found yourself in and you can witness to them - because you know exactly how they feel and what they are going through. But again, you don't have to give all the details. God has forgiven you, now you have to forgive yourself. Be still, as it says in Psalms, and know that He is God - In the quietness your strength will come. God bless you my friend.

Answer 6

I understand what you mean and are going through, but remember God has cast your sins away never more to be remembered and he needs for you to remember that. Satan likes to keep us bound by bringing into remembrance all the things we've done wrong, but he can only blame and accuse, but God forgives and forgets. trust in God with all your heart and whenever you think he is speaking to your heart, first pray about it and make sure it is truly what God has asked of you and then remember he will give you the strength to go through anything he puts before you. God knows what you can do and you need to have as equal faith in yourself.
Whenever Satan tries to discourage you with all the old sins you may have committed, remember...God's word says" We become a new creation in Christ ." God takes the worst and makes the most beautiful out of it. You have a testimony to share with someone who needs to hear it!!!! let go of your fears and doubts and let God be your guide. God bless you and keep the faith!!

Answer 7

First of all I would like to welcome you to the family of God.

You must be very important to God otherwise you would not be under this much pressure and attack.

Secondly, I want to explain something to you--how things work.

You get saved and you're excited and thankful that God has cleansed you.

Then satan comes along and begins to tell you that God expects you to expose every sin you ever did to every single person (sometimes telling you this is an obligation to tell your testimony in this way) otherwise you are not worthy of God.

Because you are new to God you don't know it is satan's voice imitating God. You think you are already failing God and will never, ever be able to follow him--satan has now tricked you and convinced you that:
#1God's salvation isn't free, it's dependent on what we do for HIM
#2That you will forever have to carry every sin you ever did as a testimony for God (this is a huge lie)
#3You are failing God if you do not tell everyone the specific details of what you were saved out of or healed from
#4That you are a failure for compromising.
#5God's ways are too hard and you'll never be able to be all God wants you to be.

THESE ARE ALL LIES from the pit of hell.

IF you were to begin to do what satan has told you to do--then you'd constantly feel judged, guilty, ashamed, remorseful, regretful and others would begin to either avoid you or pity you and you would sink into isolation with in the christian community.

This is satan's ultimate goal--if he can't discourage you upfront he'll cause you to feel an unyielding pain. THIS IS NOT GOD THE FATHER OR THE LORD JESUS OR THE HOLY SPIRIT!!!

satan loves to trick people and deceive them.

I emphasize, again, that satan does NOT tempt everyone the same way. What he is doing to you is very specific. That is why I say you must be very important to God and His kingdom to come under such an attack.

Please understand that many christians have never been under this kind of temptation and have no idea.

I pray for you to have God's wisdom, knowledge, discernment, counsel and revelation in JESUS NAME. AMEN.

email me if you want....

Answer 8

Hi Kristin!
Who the son set free is free indeed-Satan is fuming and the Word says he has come to kill,steal and destroy.Exactly-so don't let Him steal your joy.The joy of the Lord IS your strength.Satan wants to distract and test you and make you feel guilty about your past, but like all of us you are worthy.
Psalm 37:28- ' the Lord delights in justice and FORSAKES NOT HIS saints; they're preserved FOREVER, but the offspring of the wicked shall be cut off.
You are His child now and God will always protect you.
Invite the Holy Spirit into each day.You or I cannot make it or keep strong in our own strength, but the Spirit of Christ inside us can.
I wish you much peace and prosperity.

Answer 9

I just wanted to add to these wonderful answers.
You need to bury yourself in God's Word.
"There is no condemnation in Christ" if its condemnation its the enemy.Conviction is different "conviction of the Holy Spirit" its a God thing.
When you mature in His Word you will be able to let your testimony flow right out of your mouth. Without guilt and shame- it may be awkward at first but the more you tell it the easier it will be.
Stay in His Word for now it took me years to be able to share mine and it just happened to be here at R&S. I have told a few people around me but I have never stood in front of church and told it all. Write stuff out what are the visions you have for yourself and for God? sometimes we jump into things then get burned out so be careful and take it slow. Gather all the God in now and build your foundation in Jesus.
Jesus was 30 something when He started His minisrty.
Get around others that can encourage you in God.


I will be praying for you.
† Every Day Prayer Warrior †

Answer 10

As a Christian Preacher I have found many times that following God's will for my life was not easy. His will opposes our sinful nature.
But I have also found that doing God's will in my life not only enriched my spiritual connection it helped those around me.
We, here, at Anchor Point Ministries Inc. are praying that God gives you the strength to carry out His will for your life.
May God Bless.

Answer 11

I understand exactly how you feel.My wife and I lived in such gross sin and now we are so ashamed.At first we felt that we needed to share what all we had done with everyone.It took us awhile to realize that this was just one of Satan's games to turn our hearts back to what we had left behind and repented of.Do not forget how our Lord was tempted by that liar in the wilderness.Even using scripture to do it, Matthew 4:5-7.
In witnessing to others we have been moved by the Spirit to share things we have done.At these times we are not ashamed, nor do we find it to be unpleasant to do so.Please slow down a bit and give this to God for now.Above all continue to serve Him who will keep your heart and mind in Christ Jesus.