its my grandmas annaversery, my grandpa died almost a year ago, my grandma alwys brings up topics that i am not comfortable with, i really am not ready to talk to my grandma about papa (my grandpa) i am spending the night, tomorrow we will go to church and the car is her main place to talk, so wadda i do? i am driving home after church, but yeah, wadda i do
2007-09-29 13:58:51 · 14 answers · asked by Dr. Seuss 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i know isound sellfish, im sorry, i am just not comfortable, thanx 2 the ppl who understand
2007-09-29 15:09:53 · update #1
Even though you are the younger one - your Grandmom needs you.
She is probably VERY lonely and heart broken. She needs a good listener.
It may be hard for you to do this but it could be very helpful for you too. Remember it is ok to cry in front of your Grandmom!!! She loves you!!!!
Plus, your Grandmom will not be around forever - you will be grateful in the future.
2007-09-29 14:06:25 · answer #1 · answered by Penny 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
A car is a good place to talk...especially if it is a hard conversation.....you don't have to look directly at the person. Sometimes when a subject makes us uncomfortable, it is just the thing we need to talk about most. Everyone grieves and heals at their own speed. Your grandmother knows this. Her grief may be clouding her judgment OR maybe she knows you better than you know yourself. Give talking a try. If it all becomes too much, just say, "This is too much. My hurt is still too new for me to talk about it. I hope there is someone else you can share this with, because I love you and want the best for you."
2007-09-29 21:53:34 · answer #2 · answered by GamB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are driving home, you must be over 16, so you're old enough to know she is not going to be with you forever. If it makes you uncomfortable, say so (and maybe you should sit down and think about why it makes you uncomfy. It's been a year!) and keep in mind that someday you'll wish you had let her talk. Like someone previously said, grow up, The world is not all about you.
2007-09-29 21:07:47 · answer #3 · answered by Jess 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just listen. If she wants to talk to you then its because she is hurting and feels the need to talk to you. Respect your Grandma and listen. Your Papa would want you to be there for her. Be strong. If you feel so strongly just say Grandma I love you but I still hurt and would rather not talk. If you must, speak and I will listen.
2007-09-29 21:09:51 · answer #4 · answered by cold_fearrrr 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hello,, imagine that in the near future she will pass away too. The thought of not being able to talk to her may bring about some heartfelt change in yourself. Try to think of the things you like about her and be loving in your thoughts. The future is coming down fast , and time never stops. Ask your grandpa...
2007-09-29 21:15:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
When this happened with my grandma I would just say "i don't want to talk about this." The problem with saying anything close to that though is that she will get upset. Tell her why you feel the way you do and maybe you can have better luck than I did.
2007-09-29 21:02:29 · answer #6 · answered by Sweetness 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hate to hurt your feelings...but you sound really selfish. Think of your Granny and how she is hurting for the man she was married to, a man you loved but only knew a few years compared to her. Sing to yourself or just say LALALA inside your head, but let the woman have her peace. If anything ever happens to her you will be glad she confided in you. That will be your special moments.
2007-09-29 21:10:41 · answer #7 · answered by Glinda W 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's understandable that its hard for you to hear about someone you lost, but understand that she is a grandma, she isn't getting any younger and she may feel that it is important to her to talk about him. If you don't let her talk, you never know, you culd never het the opportunity to talk about it. If she is will =ing to talk , listen, open up, don't mask your feelings about this, let her talk, it will help both of you. sure its hard, but whats harder, is avoiding something that may help you both. Also, don't just think about yourself, she seems to feel the need to do this, let her.
My mom died when I was 3, barried her on my fourth birthday, and noone will ever talk about her, its to painful. So I have the opposite, I want dearly to hear all about her, but nobdy will talk to me.
Don't miss this opportunity. Grandparents don't last forever, you should hear her and ask questions. He is part of the history to your family. Sometimes we heal better when we talk about those painful things. You grandfather would want you to be happy and he would want you to remember him, she may have some really good stories that you never knew about him.
2007-09-29 21:08:32 · answer #8 · answered by Maalru3 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i wouldnt worry its your grandma and probably she is going to be grieving becuase that day meant so much to her
i would just go in the car with her and be supportive cuz ya maybe it will be awkward for a second but talking to you might really help her feel better
2007-09-29 21:03:02 · answer #9 · answered by izzydwight 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
tell her that you love her and you understand that she just lost someone very close to her. But she has to realize that you did too. and that you are not comfortable with the conversations about your grandfather. and tell her how it makes you feel. Then tell her about the other stuff you can talk about . start a new topic for a conversation.
2007-09-29 21:06:42 · answer #10 · answered by MissMystery17 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋