football season is here, and my fiance's friends are over all the timE! i wouldnt it as much, because they dont make a big mess, but they think they are welcome to open my fridge and my cabinets and help themselves!!! of course, i dont mind them eating here, but honestly, isnt it a bit rude? shouldnt they ask me first??? they just go and grab a beer, or stick the popcorn in the microwave and help themselves to bowls and so forth. i want them to feel comfy, but do you think i should set some boundaries?
2007-09-29 11:59:16 · 10 answers · asked by bar22bie 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I would go on the rotation schedule, a different house each time, and tell them to clean up their mess.
2007-09-29 12:03:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Have you told them in the past to make themselves at home? Or maybe your boyfriend did? If you haven't then they are being rude. Setting the boundaries is alright if it is done right. Has this been going on a long time or did it just start? Maybe they have always done this at your fiances house so they think that it is normal. He might also do it at theirs.They are obviously comfortable with you. I would talk to him about this and see what he says.
2007-09-29 22:00:51 · answer #2 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm I see pros and cons on both sides.... if they help themselves, then you don't need to get busy serving them stuff, bringing the beers, the glasses/bowls, making the popcorn, etc...... so that takes work off you, which is ok. If my very close friends do that, I don't mind... But I'd also feel weird to see just any people coming in and out my kitchen and grabbing whatever they want.... what if they see something they like in the fridge and grab it, even if they aren't supposed to (maybe the last piece of cheese you were saving for the dinner or whatever?? Once you see them munching on it, it's too late to do anything about it). Once they help themselves, they can do and grab whatever they want, maybe even break your glassware, who knows.
I think you should comment it with your BF, just tell him that you don't like them coming and moving stuff in YOUR kitchen, and that you'd prefer to take care of things yourself instead of having them help themselves, and you don't mind doing it. Or perhaps HE could help you do that, as well??
2007-09-29 19:25:44 · answer #3 · answered by Lprod 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have college kids here that do that. There can be anywhere between 5 and 12 here at all times. Personally I love it that they help themselves because then I don't have to worry if they are thirsty or hungry, need TP or whatever.
I would hope all my friends feel comfortable enough in my house to help themselves (even if I wasn't home and they needed something).
So I say relax and be glad you don't have to wait on them.
2007-09-29 19:49:19 · answer #4 · answered by froghugger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I sure do agree with you. I want people to feel comfy at my house too, but sometimes some people just have no manners. I always ask i never just open someone fridge or just help myself. I also hate when they don't correct there kids.
2007-09-29 19:27:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't mind them being there, it's better they help themselves rather than asking you and you having to serve them. Since they have proceeded to the point of helping themselves by now, you should just let it stay that way. Isn't it silly to have to ask you all the time?
2007-09-29 21:32:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Set the boundaries with your fiance. Let your fiance set the boundaries with his friends.
My friends certainly wouldn't be allowed eat us out of house and home. Either we serve it, or they don't consume it !
2007-09-29 19:02:45 · answer #7 · answered by Zeltar 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Rotate houses and have everyone bring something to share. Everyone should also chip in for the beverages.
2007-09-29 19:11:04 · answer #8 · answered by normy in garden city 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't flip out on them, but if it really bothers you then mention it to your fiance. Or maybe he's already telling them to help thmselves?
2007-09-29 19:03:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
their house, if they want food it should be their own.
2007-09-29 19:02:11 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋