What are your thoughts on beginning sex education at a much younger age?

Question

If children had a better understanding of sex from a much younger age, would it be beneficial to them or not as they grow up? Would it be better to be honest with children right from the moment that they first ask us where babies come from, answering all the questions they have as honestly and as openly as we possibly can? Or would this cause problems?

"I had my first sex ed class in 5th grade."
Sorry, I'm English and I don't know about the American school system. How old are 5th grade children?

"i dont do things unless i know why i should do them so people like me might start having sex at younger ages because they dont know about the risks."
I'm talking about a fully rounded sex eduction, that informs about risks too.

"I try to be as honest as possible according to their age and understanding. I try to keep it simple but with little children you do not actually talk about the sexual act. My daughter asked how she got in my belly ( she is three) and I said me and daddy made you. You need a lady and a man to make a baby. I said that she started as an egg and something that looks like a tadpole. She laughed about being an egg."
I completely understand what you are getting at, as this is all part of their education. But this is more education about 'reproduction' as opposed to 'sex'. What if the child's next question was "HOW did Daddy put me inside Mummy?" Why is it a problem to discuss the sexual act? Please try to understand that I am not trying to pose these questions an a manner that actively goes for or against sex education for young children. But why should we NOT answer our children truthfully about sex if they ask us?

What about compulsory sex education in schools beginning at a very early age, such as even first grade. A course that lasts throughout the whole of their schooling, covering all aspects of sex, reproduction, including the risks involved. Is this a good thing or a bad thing and why?

Answer 1

There is so much sex out there that if you aren't telling them about it then someone else is, and I don't mean explaining the details of intercourse. There is so much more to sex than that and every minute children are bombarded by images and suggestions and if sex is not taught and communicated freely and openly in the home then kids will come to their own conclusions.

If you don't talk to your kids you might think that you are keeping them safe and ignorant but since they know it's out there and the information is everywhere and you ignore it what they are learning from you is that sex is something to be secretive about. You are teaching your kids how to walk past the elephant in the middle of the room and pretend very well that it's not there, and believe me, when you do want to talk about it with them, or other important things like drugs etc, you will have taught them so well to pretend that when they tell you every thing's great and they are still virgins you'll believe it.

Answer 2

I try to be as honest as possible according to their age and understanding. I try to keep it simple but with little children you do not actually talk about the sexual act. My daughter asked how she got in my belly ( she is three) and I said me and daddy made you. You need a lady and a man to make a baby. I said that she started as an egg and something that looks like a tadpole. She laughed about being an egg. I do not think it causes a problem you need to be matter of fact so when they get older then they are not mystified by the whole thing. I do not want my children listening to myths and legends about sex such as kissing can get you pregnant. I want them to be able to ask and then make informed choices.

Answer 3

Because we homeschool and I therefore teach my children what we believe they should know at an appropriate time, we do begin educating them earlier. However, with the oldest being 8, none of them have asked for a literal "how" they got into my uterus. They have all seen line drawn pictures of the female and male reproductive systems. They all know something of periods and bleeding after birth. Since I've been pregnant for 4 of the last 9 years they probably know more of the after birth part. LOL But they do know about the whole reproductive part of it, they just haven't came out and asked about the sex act itself yet. When our oldest was 4 he did already know that Daddy had been loving Mommy again and that is why I was pregnant. When I showed them an 8-wk ultrasound pic he said, "Oh, I see you've been loving Mom again, huh Dad?" It was very funny! But from that I know that he knows we "do" something to create the baby. Maybe because they have common sense they have figured out to some extent (since they have seen line drawings) that the shapes fit together somehow. They do know they aren't supposed to touch in these areas until marriage and then only with their spouse, so perhaps they know something of how it happens just from being taught what they have so far.

Another thing our children completely understand is childbirth. We family birth, so they have viewed birth firsthand and my 4yo wants to be a midwife because of it. I don't even use a midwife and I birth in a hospital with a male doctor, she just has heard me talk of midwives and has decided that is what she wants to be. My 8yo son was almost 7 when his baby brother was born. He told me when he was crowning. None of them have ever had any strange reactions to birth, been in any way disturbed by it, or anything weird. They just figure it is a normal part of life. They think it's kind of strange that other kids don't know how babies get out of mom's tummy! But don't worry, since they are homeschooled they won't go telling your youngster the truth.

Answer 4

"Would it be better to be honest with children right from the moment that they first ask us where babies come from, answering all the questions they have as honestly and as openly as we possibly can?" Yes. You hit the nail right on the head. Open and honest communication between kids and parents is the best way for them to learn about sex. What causes problems is when there is lack of communication. "What about compulsory sex education in schools beginning at a very early age, such as even first grade. A course that lasts throughout the whole of their schooling, covering all aspects of sex, reproduction, including the risks involved. Is this a good thing or a bad thing and why?" Parents shouldn't rely on schools to teach their kids about sex. The materials they use can be outdated, biased, agenda-driven, and incomplete. Not that I blame them. Schools and teachers can be scrutinized by every little detail they provide, so they probably err on the side of caution. Search Wikipedia for the answers to your other questions, or just try talking to your parents. Tell them you're going to learn about that stuff from somebody sooner or later, but you'd prefer it to be them.

Answer 5

I think children should learn at their own pace so when questions are asked they should be answered properly and their age taken into account on how much information is given children should be allowed their childhood and these bounderies will be set in place naturally without it been forced upon them when they are not ready and has far as sex education goes in school my children did it in their last year at juniors and I wasn't against it but I still think it's to young and it's only a lesson where kids think it's more amusing than educational.

Answer 6

I think parents should address 'sex ed' with their children openly and honestly once they start asking questions. My daughter is 4 and has already asked us where babies come from and what the difference between girls and boys are. We answered her in age-appropriate terms and allegories. Obviously when she gets older, the explanations will become more advanced and specific. Parents that are evasive and embarrassed about discussing sex with their kids will end up with kids that are evasive and embarrassed about it later on in life (i.e. teen hood and beyond). As unpleasant as the subject is, I want my child to be comfortable coming to me with questions and problems first, rather than taking a sampling of opinions of her peers as facts. I want her to have faith that I will be open and honest with her concerns and questions. That kind of behavior has to be instilled from the earliest age, not just when they become sexually active. It is ultimately parents' responsibility to educate their children about their world, not just leave it up to a teacher or school system.

Answer 7

I believe sex should be discuss based upon the children's age. I do agree that sex ed should be taught because apparently....some kids do not understand how their reproductive systems work. There are girls getting pregnant at 12 and 13 yrs of age because of lack of education.

People believe if you discuss this issue that it only stirs up curiosity but...it's already there. Kids are starting puberty at 11-12 yrs old and wondering why their bodies are doing this...so, lets educate them!!!

5th graders are usually 10-11 yrs old her in the US

Answer 8

Children at young ages don't know about sex because they don't need to know.

Most children don't ever ask questions about actual sex until they are older, around 10 maybe.

The "hard" questions that children ask at young ages is about reproduction because they see things like babies and pregnant women, etc. So, all they need an answer for is reproduction.

If a kid asks where babies come from, most children are satisfied with the answer "you came from mommy's tummy". If they ask follow-up questions, like "how did I get out?" or "how did I get in?" then simple answers are necessary.

Until a child actually asks about the act of sex itself and it is clear they are NOT just asking about reproduction, then it is safe to tell them about sex.

Answer 9

My husband and I always felt it should begin early, at a very young age you teach them to respect their own bodies, and they have a right not to be touched, hugged, kissed or whatever, then we respected their choice not give me ma a kiss as she was leaving, sometimes embarrassing, but they should be able to have a say with out being rude. We had age appropriate talks with them when they started asking questions, we answered as honestly as we could without being too graphic, As they got into 5th and 6th grade 11-12 years of age, we started talking to them about reputations and the importance of being proud of your choices, at 12-13 we taught abstinence, but also pushed birth control if they did have sex! Our daughter had graduated from high school and was in college when she came to us for help with birth control, not an easy conversation, but her and her bf had been dating a little over year, they did get married after college and now have 2 little boys, her first was born when she was 25, our son is 21 and in college, so far so good with him also! My brother and his wife have 4 kids, they taught nothing but abstinence, 3 out of 4 were pregnant or had a girl pregnant by 16, the youngest was 13. In a perfect world abstinence would be great! But we have to be realistic too!

Answer 10

I look at it this way. People have been teaching their kids younger and younger as time passes, and ive seen younger and younger mothers as time goes. If my children have a question I try and answer them as honestly as I can but mabey were teaching our kids where babies come from without teaching them the morales that go along with that information. when you talk to them about sex, also talk to them about when is the right time ti have sex. and how hard it is to raise a baby when your not finanially ready, or emotionally ready. Ive just noticed that, you turn on these talk shows and it shows 12 year olds having sex. yikes, thats scary.