Let's face it: English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
And while no one knows what is in a hotdog,
you can be pretty sure it isn't canine.
English muffins were not invented in England
nor French fries in France.
Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads,
which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted.
But if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly,
boxing rings are square,
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write,
but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce,
and hammers don't ham?
If the plural of tooth is teeth,
why isn't the plural of booth, beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese?
Is cheese the plural of choose?
One mouse, 2 mice.
One louse, 2 lice.
One house, 2 hice ?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables,
what does a humanitarian eat?
2007-09-29 06:42:14 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Why do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?
Ship by truck or car and send cargo by ship?
Have noses that run and feet that smell?
Park on driveways and drive on parkways?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
How can the weather be hot as Hell one day
and cold as Hell another?
When a house burns up, it burns down.
You fill in a form by filling it out
and an alarm clock goes off by going on.
You get in and out of a car,
yet you get on and off a bus.
When the stars are out, they are visible,
but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it,
but when I wind up this essay, I end it?
English is a silly language ...
it doesn't know if it is coming or going !!
2007-09-29 06:42:40 · update #1
That inspired me of one big issue, El3egl fe batn ommo, sorry I mean mamto :)
2007-09-29 08:56:29 · answer #1 · answered by Salloo7a 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes the English language is confusing *Stars*
2016-04-06 06:59:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lecture about English
A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."
A voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."
2007-09-29 06:48:54 · answer #3 · answered by gardenerswv 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
My dad and I used to play around with English like that.
My favorite word in English is Onomatopoeia, and I made my ID's that way. This word is pronounced differently from how its spelled. Its pronounced: on·o·mato·pe·ia
I dont even pronouce the "T" or the "O" on the end.
2007-09-29 08:07:47 · answer #4 · answered by Onomatopoeia 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your very smart and I give u a star as well!!!
As an American I've wondered the same things about Hamburger and Pineapple,Eggplant.
Im sure that a lot of us are thinking and scratching our head and thinking yeah ur right it is a crazy language becuase it is!!!
2007-09-29 08:52:20 · answer #5 · answered by FeshFash 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
And yet, it makes perfect sense when used as intended. I didn't realize there were so many contradictions until I saw them all laid out like that. A star for you.
2007-09-29 07:30:50 · answer #6 · answered by Kitty39 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol u made me smile!
*star*
you just might have too much time on your hands but don't take this the wrong way!
2007-09-29 07:05:22 · answer #7 · answered by julia❀✿ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Very clever
2007-09-29 08:50:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow that cleaver, i neva thought of it like that
i suppose it is really weird,
i no its the hardest language to learn.
2007-09-29 06:46:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was cool! My favorite part is "what does a humanitarian eat?"
@->-->-
2007-09-29 06:47:24 · answer #10 · answered by Chimpanzees? Monkey. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋