He tells me that he loves me and wants to spend his life with me, that he is attracted to me and tells me how sexy I am. But when I initiate sex, he just doesnt want it. I am attractive and outgoing. I do love him (all the other aspects are great) but do I want to spend my life with once a month sex? And is the online porn to blame?
2007-09-29 02:34:25 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm not sure what is exactly wrong, because I don't know him.
I've done some research just now into addiction to Pornography online. And I'm still thinking that it can go either way. Either he could be escaping feelings of inadequacy while having sexual relations with you and using pron to satisfy his own needs. OR he could be dealing with feelings of guilt sexually, and not want to be intimate with you because of that guilt.
A third scenario could be that he is cheating on you. You should talk to him about your concerns and tell him that he needs to be intimate with you more. Find some consequences that you are willing to follow through with and that are appropriate to the situation as well.
2007-09-29 02:53:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
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2016-07-17 20:07:45 · answer #2 · answered by Cheryl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People in long term relationships often experience a drop in the frequency of sex. It's almost impossible to keep up the bunny pace indefinitely, so you shouldn't judge the frequency by that measure. However, there has to be enough for you to feel satisfied with the sexual aspect of the relationship. Since you say you live together, one thing I would perhaps suggest is just initiating sexually arousing contact with him when you are together in the bed, rather than asking for it or expecting him to initiate it. If he's too tired in the evenings, consider initiating it in the mornings on a free weekend, perhaps by lightly playing with his genitals while lying beside him to give that "morning wood" a good head start. Or you might try talking to him about exploring mutual fantasies you haven't yet explored. If you can find a way to give the sex a new twist, it may respark his interest. Do you sleep naked with him? If not, I recommend it. It's hard for a guy not to get a woody when the girl is spooning up to him all nice and warm and naked.
2016-04-06 06:46:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heck No about online porn being to blame. I know that stuff makes me wanna go at it. No you don't want to live with sex once a month. You love him, but are you in love with him (think about it)? Same question to your lover. Or out of all you got going you still might be doing something wrong. Check yourself out from head to toe, personality check, you know. If none of that works dump him and give me a call.
2007-09-29 08:13:17 · answer #4 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree he sounds lazy, he would rather use his hands than to have a real woman with real feelings. I don't get it. Men may be visual creatures, but so are woman, at least i am. I would rather have a real man in my bedroom,versus a man on a screen. He is a boyfriend, at least you aren't married. That is a plus, if you had talked to him and it doesn't work, i would say put on your walking shoes, there is someone out there who can give you the love and ATTENTION you deserve. Good luck
2007-09-29 02:51:16 · answer #5 · answered by sweetemtation_123 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
okay it might sound wierd but when a guy gets addicted to porn there no long attracted in bed with real woman he might still love you but whenever he would have wanted to have sex w/ you hell watch porn im sooo sorry but its a fact!!! <3
2007-09-29 02:39:13 · answer #6 · answered by I Love Walter!!! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
porn is a huge problem and a terrible addiction. he needs help to overcome it, but it is probably the hardest habit to kick. and he may not be ready to change anyway. do what you need to do for yourself. i know it's hard to do. bu ti know that if you start working on what is best for you, you will find someone who truly appreciates you and makes you happy. staying in that unhealthy relationship is only gonna end up doing damage to you that is totally unnecessary.
2007-09-29 03:25:31 · answer #7 · answered by plastik punk -Bottom Contributor 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is on line porn a new thing for him in your relationship? If it is your going to have to lay down the law, no more on line porn for a long while or no more relationship.
2007-09-29 03:08:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he is lazy... he doesn't really have to do anything when watching porn. Maybe he is addicted to porn.. and needs help... For any reason.. you need to talk to him about it... and figure out whats going on.. maybe you guys just need to spice things up...buy some sexy lingerie...do a sexy accent etc... but definitely talk to him!
2007-09-29 02:38:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anna J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd start of with getting rid of the P.C.
Its kinda addictive, he should be paying attention to you and it seems like it's getting in the way.
Hasn't he any actual answer as to why, from what you've said he hasn't even answered the question!
2007-09-29 02:40:34 · answer #10 · answered by smaxsx1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋