How do you focus on a woman you like, when your focus is on how you look instead?

Question

I have to just be honest. Most of the time, my focus is on me, and my thoughts are about how do I look; How many women looked at me; focusing on maintaining my confidence in public, along with other things I have to do even, and also, trying to get a girls attention (get her to look at me). How in the world do I break myself to pay attention to her genuinely, instead of worrying about what I look like? It's a fricken curse that I want to break.


This stems from this question-


http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AuOO8PJr4iaZPKOApcaaKsPsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20070929040158AA9wpRC

oh ya, please don't tell me to stop being self-centered, that doesn't help.

Answer 1

What you feel is self conscious not self centered at all. That guy is an idiot from hell who said that. You have to accept yourself and not give a rat's *** if others find you attractive or not. Just stop those thoughts as soon as you have them. Replace those thoughts with positive ones. I can help you more thorough e-mail if you like.

Answer 2

Worrying about how you look is not self-centered.

First, in response to the other post you had concerning this: she probably thought you didn't notice her and wanted you to say something like a compliment.

However, you think she looks better without dressing up? Believe me, I know what it is to be shy! I was once like that all the time.....but one of these days, you have to force yourself to compliment her on something....compliment how she looks on a day she is dressed regularly (this will show her she doesn't have to dress up to win you).

That curse you share with many people: think about it---you take a guy and a girl talking to each other. The guy is all the time worried about how he looks BUT also the girl is all the time also worrying about how she looks. She might be thinking the same thing. SO if you both are focused on yourselves----no one is criticizing you (except for you).

Believe me, people are a lot better-looking and more eloquent than they think they are.

You can try this: when someone is talking, pretend that they are going to tell you something you absolutely need to know, something very interesting, something so IMPORTANT that you have to listen closely.

Have confidence and remember it is better to take a chance and get a no, than to drive yourself crazy by wondering all the time!

Have faith in yourself!!!

Answer 3

This is very important for both of you to understand. What counts first and foremost is that she is satisfied and happy with what she is doing. If you are both happy that is even better. It really doesn't matter what other people think about your career, they are not the one that is living it. They need to worry about their own. Your wife sounds like she has it together. When she has children and you start your family, it is most important for a mother to be with her children. She nurtures them and prepares them to be adults. Having children is the most important thing a woman can do and they will need your love, support, guidance forever. Nurturing them as they grow is and awesome experience and should be cherished even before you have children. The father plays a very important role also. You both need to work together on decisions for the children and let them see how things are done properly and loving each other is very important. That and being happy and not taking life too seriously and letting the children see that. So don't worry about what other people think. It is your family and your choice. Your marriage is also very important. Don't forget each other. You don't exchange relationships,you add to it with children. Time alone together is important. Keep in mind that you got together first. The children do leave home one day. You will want them to see that Mom and Dad love each other and they can take that to their relationships. Enjoy every moment.

Answer 4

It's ok,to be aware of your looks! But yeah,ladies like to feel good and have someone notice they look nice.Especially,when we put effort into it.

Maybe you need to get into a dirty sport.Like baseball,something to help break your habit. While you have a good time,you can't be aware of your looks.You'll get hit in the head.Invite your lady to come and cheer you on!
Building something,in carpentry.That's dusty! I think men are sexy,especially while they are working or working out.

Strong hands,strong backs(whew)! A lady who sees you alittle dirty hair messed up and then seeing how you look cleaned up too.Hey ,..........now!

Good Luck!At least you are aware of something about yourself ..you want to change for yourself .Take care!

Answer 5

Try thinking of her more & think if she doesn't like me for anything but my looks she's not worth it anyway.

Answer 6

hey man I think your gay or obsess with yourself rethink your options

Answer 7

stop being self-centered you douche

Answer 8

can't explain