seperated once from mother, for a period of 5months, 3 of which she moved to another state. children left in fathers care entire time. Mother returns, mom dad try to rework marriage, 5 months later, it falls apart due to mom drinking, missing work, out all hours of the night. Dad has her leave, after, dad still tries to reconcile marriage, mother sleeps around no stable home. Dad takes care of children soley for 4months, tries to get mom stable.
mother goes to court in new county, claims spousal abuse, courts believe her, children are taken from dad w/no warning from his home at 9pm. Protectin order against him and cant contact kids. mom noshows on court date for TPO, dismissed. Dad tries to get temp custody during divorce, court tells him he has equal rights, but when trys to see kids mom denies(and life threatened), unless he agrees to 50/50 MSA before divorce date. mom-lives w/bf, in another county, has no job, lives in home w/9 people, has child abuse case pending.
2007-09-28 19:23:04 · 6 answers · asked by elitewolverine 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He needs to bring in Child Protective Services. Slow but through process
And if he doesn't do it , believe me now or believe me later, he will be the one taking the fall
Yes it is a long process, but the best route to go
2007-09-28 20:07:58 · answer #1 · answered by JOHN 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A good lawyer is a must. Ask around. A lot of cities now have organizations that help fathers going through custody issues - they may be able to recommend an attorney. Some states will allow the children to have a say in which home they live in, as long as they're above a certain age.
Your dad (and you) need to document every incident - every phone call, letter, and all personal contact. If she's drinking in front of (or when she's with the kids), write it down. If anyone else who's living in the house is drinking around the kids, write it down. If there's fighting in front of the kids, write it down. This may seem extreme, but when it comes time to go to court, she'll be lobbing unverified accusations, and your dad will have names, dates, and specific examples. It goes without saying that everyone on your side will need to keep their tongues in check during this time so as not to give her any amo to use against your dad.
Find out what the laws are concerning tape recording phone calls. Most states will allow it, you just have to notify the person that you're taping the call (you'd still be surprised what they'll say even when they *know* they're being recorded!)
If she's interfering with visitation, have your dad bring someone with him as a witness when he tries to see the kids (preferably someone who'll be appealing to the judge). And write it down, also.
Good luck.
2007-09-29 03:06:36 · answer #2 · answered by Firefly MOM 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you are old enough to decide what the truth is. Where do you feel most safe? It sounds like you have really been affected by all the problems your mother and your father have had. It wouldnt hurt if you got some counselling for youself because you sound very confused. Maybe, with counselling you will be better equipped to know how you really feel. I really feel for kids who are caught in the crossfire of their parents problems. Kids are the innocent victims. Get some help for yourself and stop trying work out who is wrong or who is right. Your emotional state is very important. What happened between your parents was pretty horrible and it should never have involved you. As much as it shouldnt have involved the kids, it did....so now is the time to get some help for your confused emotions. Its OK to love both your parents, even though one may have problems. You dont have to choose. You just have to get this right in your head. Try counselling....it may just help you sort out your feelings.
2007-09-29 02:47:50 · answer #3 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunatly welcome to the world of a divorced father. My husband is going through even worse. fortunately we have one of his kids. His son is now living in a homeless shelter and he is trying to get the courts to give us his son. His daughter was raped by her mothers boyfriend, so we have her......the same guy held a gun to my husbands son and threatened to kill him with his mother watching then after she had sex with him in front of the kids. We still can't get his son. WTF? I wish you the best of luck. What ever you do, don't give up on your kids. I know how hard it can be. also child abuse/child neglect case.
2007-09-29 02:42:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best advice I can give you is to find a good lawyer and listen to his/her advice. I am sorry that you are in this situation and I truly hope the best for you and your family.
2007-09-29 02:28:18 · answer #5 · answered by drshorty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Prove yourself who you say you are,get as many character references stateing you as who and what you are.It might not work but it will not hurt.
2007-09-29 02:30:16 · answer #6 · answered by Robert T 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋