Is this sexist?

Question

We hyphenated our names after marriage. My wife just had make a copy of the marriage license, and get new social security cards, driver's license, etc. Her name was legally changed.

For me to do it, I was going to have to go before a judge, swear that I wasn't changing my name to flee my creditors or avoid prosecution. Then I would have had to take out an ad in the public notices section of the local newspaper, go back before the judge, pay a fee, and then my name would be changed. Then I would have had to get new paperwork, etc.

So I just use my hyphenated name as an alias.

I live in Colorado.

I'm not trying to play the victim here. I'm just curious about why things are the way they are. It's entirely possible to me that there are inequalities that are not themselves a real form of discrimination.

Answer 1

I think its because men normally dont change their name when they get married. Its not the norm. So no one is use to it and the laws arent up to date enough to handle it. So, I dont think its actually sexist, I just think you are doing something normal people dont do , so they laws arent up to it.

Answer 2

darlin', theres lots of injustices in the world.
You may have to do that, but hows about the fact that your wife, who might have quite nicely paid her own phone bill for ten years, in telling the phone company that she has married and wants to add her husbands name to the monthly bill, gets sent a credit check form to get her name checked out, when shes still just the same person as she ever was?
Nasty eh?
When that happened to me some time back, I took the local telephone company to task over it and they backed down (I dont know if it is still policy, I would almost bet not) but the man in the hot seat did tell me honestly when I asked if that would happen to a man just because he married, that it most definitely would not have happened.
Needless to say I wasnt made to go through with it.
so its swings and slides.
Dont feel special! In this weird climate of Political correctness, everyone gets to sit under the microscope at times!!!

Answer 3

If the form you filled out only allowed women to check that the reason that they are changing their name is due to marriage, I would say yes it is sexist... but I must say, I've never heard of a case like yours before... not that it's never happened.

Answer 4

Yes. In California there is a law being worked on that will make name changes equal for men and women. It's all just a throwback to when all women changed their names to their husband's name. Times have changed; the laws will too.

Answer 5

Yes, in my opinion, it is sexist that you have to jump thru so many more hoops to have your name changed after marriage than your wife does. Perhaps one day enough people will complain about this sexism to change it.

Answer 6

Not really. You are the original "owner" of the 'surname'.For You to change 'Your' identity would require a formal application to the courts and the filing of a 'deed poll'. Your Wife is adopting Your name through the process of a matrimonial act.
I. also have an hyphenated surname

Answer 7

Wow. I thought a woman changing her name was a hassle. I guess it just goes to show that a man changing his name in our society is unusual, whereas women do it all the time.

Answer 8

Your wife is sexist in that she wouldnt accept your name.

What are your kids going to do when they get married, have 3 or 4 surnames?

You are a victim in this silly social fallacy.

Answer 9

that is sexist. what state do u live in?

Answer 10

It sounds like it to me. =/
But what do I know?