Should I let his wife know he cheated since he has refused to contact me?

Question

I was the other woman. We were together for a year and he wife never knew. However I have the guilt and leaves with the pleasure of knowing he got off

Answer 1

You SHOULD tell her......not for revenge, but because she has a right to know. This "gentleman" (and I use the term loosely), has obviously hurt you, and he is hurting his wife. She MUST know, so she can deal with it once and for all. She will find out eventually, because I don't think that you were the only one...or the last one. The longer it takes for her to find out, the harder it will be on her, and her kids (if any)

Answer 2

Did you really think he wanted you,he got just what he wanted and went back to his wife because he loves her. I'm sure he gave you the same song and dance that they all give to the other woman. My wife he selfish, we don't get along, we don't sleep in the same bed, we stopped having sex, I don't love my wife any more, she doesn't respect me. How many did he tell you or did he have a different approach to get what he wanted from you. Why do women become so dump and desperate, could it be that she can't believe a man like that would talk to her let alone want to be with her. This is where the stupidity comes into play,why would a married man want her(answer) he wouldn't but she is desperate at this point and will do just about anything to keep the married man. So your miserable now and you want to make the one who you think is responsible for you two breaking up miserable as well. Misery loves company right, you are the lowest of low if you tell the wife who by the way had nothing to do with his actions. If you try to destroy her world just because you fell for a married mans lines, don't take it out on her take it out on the one person who really deserves it,that would be YOU.

Answer 3

You are a seriously disturbed person - I believe they call it sadistic - you enjoy putting people in pain. I'm sure it would make your day if you could ruin someone elses.

Fact is, you were just as guilty of wrong doing as he was - no less. You thought nothing of his wife then, so why care now. You don't care - you want revenge because he cut you off. He finally grew a brain and gave you up - now its your turn. Wise up, accept your role as second best and always last, put it behind you, move ahead and never get involved with a taken man again.

Answer 4

Haven't you done enough? You have an affair knowingly and then you want to make matters worse by destroying what is left of his marriage. He doesn't want to talk to you because the relationship is over.

Get a life of your own and move on. Unless you are the most selfish cruel person you won't feel any better. Why do you want to hurt her? What has she done to you? You are the bad person here not her, leave her alone and move on!

Answer 5

It must be hard reading the answers you are getting. However adultery is wrong, and no good can come of it.
You know this man better than we.
He will probably cheat again, and you do his wife no favours by leaving her ignorant.
However don't expect her to be grateful or friendly.

If your intention is hurtful, think of the wife, children and others that will be hurt. maybe he is trying to do the right thing by his wife as he should have in the first place.

Answer 6

answer these few question for me please. 1) did you knew he was married? 2) did you willing or force to get involve with him? 3) did you execpt more from the affair? sound like to me he refused to contact you because the thrill is gone. so your reason now to contact his wife because he refuse to get in touch with you. lady, you should contact her way before you agree to drop your pants and panties for him. let it be a lesson learn, dont fool around with a married man. but you should go and get yourself check out, you never know how many times he have cheated on his wife. i am sure you're not the first lady that he had an affair with.

Answer 7

Aww, leave it alone and find someone else. I know that it can be difficult, so I won't be judgemental, but ask yourself what the hell you were doing with this guy. He is obviously a selfish person if he would date outside of his marriage, and you don't need that. Drop the guilt, it's self imposed. It happened, resolve not to do it again and move on. Getting even or getting revenge is a fruitless activity, you have more important things to spend your energy on.

There are lots of single men out there who don't have commitment issues and are ready to love you. You are wasting your time plotting to tell his wife when you could be out there enjoying your life. He already took a year away from you. Don't give him anymore time. Pick yourself up and move on. You are worth more than he can or ever did offer.

Answer 8

Get real.....she knew the wife always knows. Why do you think he will not contact you? You were just a disosable piece of a$$, a wh*#e.that is what you were and will be until you realize that married men are just that.....married. He won't contact you because you r just not worth anything to him. Don't waste youe time,find your own man. If you do start in with his wife be prepared for harrasment charges to be filed against you, and guess whos side he will be on....one clue not yours.

Answer 9

A lot of people will condemn you for being with a married man, and in a way they are right. Being with someone who couldn't offer you a full commitment is never wise. But as someone who has been cheated on, I KNOW that no-one can make a faithful partner cheat - they must be open to it, before anything can happen.
As to your question. If doing it purely out of a sense of revenge - then don't. You will get less out of it than you hoped, and you won't hurt him as much as her.
Should she know? Yes, but if you truly had her feelings in mind, you wouldn't have had a relationship with her husband. And not have waited until HE said it was over before trying to contact her.
Learn from this experience, and find a man who is free to commit to you.

Answer 10

I was the other man, she left me and without a explanation,I though of telling him, but all that does is make all the good times we did have get blown away by the terrible thing that I would have done to the innocent ,her husband,their kids,their parents,other family members,friends.All because I wanted revenge for her hurting me. Think it out,not worth hurting all those people for a failed affair. take the loss and find another. Good luck, hope your mend your broken heart,it IS a struggle.

Answer 11

I don't know. I think if you really wanted her to know you would have told her when you found out he was married. Since you didn't until he refused to contact you it sounds like you are trying to punish him and hurt her. You should move on and find a man that isn't in a relationship.