My 14 year old son goes to an all boys private school; they have an all girls "sister" school. This weekend is homecoming at son's school, and he has asked 14 year old girl to the dance. This is his first "date" (he's a bit of a nerd), whole family is excited. I discovered via reading his email tongiht (don't kvetch about that!) that the girls told him to a) pick her up at a friend's house because she's getting ready there and b) don't call her on her house phone but her cell phone so she won't be home.
My sons' father was planning on picking the kids up, taking them to the dance, then home. But it sounds to me like this girl may not have told her parents, and may be hiding something.
Or am I paranoid? What would you do? (No, we don't know the parents....but the kids at these two schools interact all the time, and this girl is always at all the activities with ther friends.)
The one thing my son told me about this girls was that "her parents are really really strict."
2007-09-28 14:53:13 · 13 answers · asked by Dirty Martini 6 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I feel like I'm maybe complicit in her being dishonest with her parents. But I know this may be the case because I was reading my son's email...yikes. I don't want to be an adult participating in a teenage girl hiding and lying things from her parents.
2007-09-28 15:00:19 · update #1
LOL..there was a REASON I said parents only! First of all: he loves the school he goes to and doesn't want to go anywhere else. It is a nationally renowned prep school, whose graduates includes well known actors and musicians. I'm sending him there because he has a genius IQ and I want him to get the best education possible.
Second: he calls HIMSELF a nerd and he laughs. This isn't a normal 14 year old as compared to those of you who wrote (thank goodness!)
And yes he is a Great Kid! I trust him...he's never been in a moments of trouble. Straight As constantly. It's the other kids that I don't trust.
And if I'm overprotective, its because he is worth it, and I love him more than life itself. ANd he isn't upset about my parenting at all.
2007-09-29 04:33:06 · update #2
The girl lied to her parents, yes. But your son didnt lie to you, most likely meaning that they dont plan to do anything illegal or immoral but that she is violating one of the other parents rules
2007-09-28 15:29:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I'd call the parents, or at least the parents of the "friend". If you need a cover, just call the "friends" parents to remind them that your son's dad will be picking them up and mention it.. will other parents be there? should I send him with a camera or will you or so & so's parents be taking pictures.. can't hurt. I remember when I was a 14 yr old girl....I know when my son is of age I'll be the "paranoid" mom, no doubt!
2007-09-28 15:05:58 · answer #2 · answered by Samantha M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your son sounds like a good kid. I applaud that.
But why are you reading his email? Is this a regular thing? Why shouldn't we kvetch about that? I'd endorse violating a kid's privacy in certain circumstances--you think he's using drugs or having sex, etc.--but is this standard operating procedure at your house?
And why is the "whole family excited" about his date? I can't imagine anything more embarassing for a 14-yr-old boy. If he's a good kid and you trust him, let him have a life.
2007-09-28 15:34:30 · answer #3 · answered by silvercanoe 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think of that there are a number of things that have replaced at present from even 10 years in the past (while i grow to be a youngster). mothers very almost do not provide you the choice to stay at living house anymore because of the fact it is too costly to stay. So, many youngsters are being raised in daycares and later, in faculties. Then, there is the concern of media impression. Too many mom and dad park their youngsters in front of the television or pc so as that they are in a position to get stuff accomplished. while i grow to be a toddler, we'd pass outdoors, play video games, or study books. My mom and dad additionally inspired pastimes. television is such an undemanding selection at present as a exchange of the different stuff, which contributes not in basic terms to youngsters having indecent values, yet additionally to laziness and weight problems. Plus, they have all of this pent up power that they ought to deplete in some way. I additionally think of that fogeys ward off specific subjects with their youngsters, taking the stance that in the event that they don't talk approximately it, it won't take place. as a exchange, they pass away issues like intercourse to examine with the aid of faculty and television. even though it feels like i'm blaming the mummy and dad, it is not that i'm. it is incredibly problematical to parent your infants once you're working 8 hours or extra an afternoon, and are available living house exhausted, yet nevertheless ought to set up dinner, do dishes, sparkling the living house, and get your infants to mattress.
2016-10-20 06:39:57 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lots of girls get ready at their friends house, it's more fun when you have someone around to help you with your hair and you can all fuss. Her just telling him to call her cell phone may be innocent enough as to make sure that he doesn't call the house and have to deal with her not being there, she could be being very nice.
However the parents are strict thing may be the sign that she is sneaking out. Have your husband when he goes to pick them up, ask her out right about it to make sure that's she's allowed out.
2007-09-28 15:03:36 · answer #5 · answered by Zyggy 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
My children, daughter and son. Were/are not allowed to date until age 16. My guess is that if this kid is at an all girls school, there is a good chance that she is not allowed to date at such a young age, especailly if "her parents are really, really strict."
2007-09-28 15:04:02 · answer #6 · answered by Kim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That and if hes a nerd maybe sh doesnt want someone knowing theyre going together? Plus some parent dont allow dates until kids are like 18 so her parents may not know. its prolly not a bad thing.
2007-09-28 14:57:39 · answer #7 · answered by kaseysospacey 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Umm... GIrls have parties to get ready for dances. I have been to about six of them. Theres nothing bad going on there.
Stop reading your sons mail
2007-09-28 17:50:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
You were checking your sons E-mail? Wow, you must not trust your child at all. I had 6 people at my house getting ready for a dance. Seriously, start trusting your child he sounds like you protect him enough (boy school), and he doesn't sound like hes up to anything. How would this girl afford a dress, shoes, jewelery, etc without her parents knowing anyways? Think about it.
2007-09-28 14:59:43 · answer #9 · answered by Shelbi =) 5 · 4⤊ 3⤋
i would imagine that she didnt tell her parent cuz they dont want her dating. i dont think thats a real problem, like she's not gonna get ur son to do drugs or anything.
2007-09-28 14:58:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋