Wondering about something?

Question

This is a long boring philosophical question. Please, skip to another question if you are not in the mood for long questions.
Thanks.

Now, my question is:
Who would you befriend ? Who would you rather be seen with?
A- a hypocrite. Someone who pretends to be religious in public but ignores performing the rituals,i.e does not pray for example. You "suspect" that he is a hypocrite, but you do not know for sure.
B- Someone who openly does not want to perform the rituals, who does not want to pray or fast for example.

The reason why I asked this is that I have always thought about this. I had different views about this issue:

When I was young:
I used to think that religious people are much better than unreligious ones. Things were clear and simple at that time. I believed that those who prayed are going to heaven. Thus, I should be their friends, and those who did not are going to hell. Thus, I should stay away from them. That was phase 1.

Then, as I grew up, and started to gain more experience in life, I learned that there are unreligious people who claim to be religious "hypocrites". But there are unreligious people who don't deny it.
As time of teenage is the time of rebellion, I developed more respect to "in your face" unreligious people because of their bravery and straightforwardness. On the other hand, I despised the "hypocrites". As a result, I had lots of friends who openly did not pray.That was phase two.

Lately, I changed my view........
I began to think that a hypocrite is better than a "flat out" unbeliever. Simple because if a person is a hypocrite, I would not know. It would be something between him and God. On the other hand, the straightforward unbelievers are simply defiant to what I believe in. So, I began to think that I should not be friends with those who openly do not want to pray. No matter how honest, sincere or "cool" they are.

So, what do you think?
Thanks. And sorry for such a looong question, but there was no way to make shorter.
My apologies.......

Hey "written",
I respect your opinion and thumbed it up. I am asking this to get to know different views. I hope people would not turn it to a personal issue and start thumbing everyone down.

Hey "written",
I respect your opinion and thumbed it up. I am asking this to get to know different views. I hope people would not turn it to a personal issue and start thumbing everyone down.

Answer 1

I will give u a very very short answer for ur very long question

My answer is: NEITHER!

Answer 2

B- Someone who openly does not want to perform the rituals, who does not want to pray or fast for example.

First of all, I wouldn't care "who I'm seen with"...people stake way too much on reputation. If someone doesn't want to fast or pray and openly admits it, then he is doing what he believes to be right. His view can be changed. If he is set on his belief, or lack thereof, then there's nothing to be done. But he's not fake.

And I might add, it is not up to you or anyone else to "suspect" anyone of being a hyprocrite. Someone can be extremely religious and still not perform the rituals, such as praying. That doesn't really indicate much. It's all about your HEART and intent, not so much your actions.

From your question, I get the sense that you're a very judgmental person. Befriend good people, people that make you good as well. Don't befriend religions and actions, befriend the people behind it.

Religion should never become stronger than your faith. I think a lot of people are forgetting that nowadays...

Anyways, great question! =) =) =)

Answer 3

Well Ismaily, things are not as simple as you have put them, I'll have to use a totally different set of categorization. What if we start by asking what does this person think about his actions? Why is he doing what he does, whether he perceives it as good or bad? I think different persons doing similar actions can yield different results.

To make mysaelf clear let me give some examples.

Within your category "B" lets talk about a Moslem who openly drinks alcohol out of defiance to his community and established rules an a westerner who drinks alcohol out of cultural convictions... although both are doing the same action but I would befriend the second not the first.

So if you get what I mean, the real criteria should be "why" someone behaves in a certain way rather than "what" he really does.

I think Its all about intentions not actions.

Answer 4

I am going to have to say B simply because it is the way life is these days. You either believe and pray or you don't. It is not a denial if someone don't have those feelings to be religious. It don't make them a hypocrite if they don't pray or believe in something they don't see fit for their lifestyle. It is a way of life and how others chose to practice what they've been preached. People grow up in different ways and shouldn't be forced to believe in anything because they are afraid of not having any friends or care what others think about them. It is all about who the person is in general and how you want them to be in your life. You chose your friends and anyone outside of blood relatives to be in your life. Don't hate on those who don't deserve to be treated as an outsider because they don't believe in what you do. People want to have friends and some like others more because of who they are and what affect they have on the other person. If they didn't do you wrong, who are you to treat them bad or with disrespect? How would you feel if someone came to you and said that you were a bad person because you believed in a certain religion? All because of the way you were brought to believe? It is a battle upon battle and that causes chaos and war. We should keep open minds and learn to live on this world with each other. No one asked to be here but we are. We shouldn't be condemned for anything because of what we believe or have faith in. I can honestly say that I have no religion but I am a great person (maybe not the greatest, I know), love my family and friends (whoever I may chose to keep in my life), have morals, know what is right or wrong for someone to do to me. Do unto others as you would want done for yourself. If they don't want to pray or fast then so be it. It is not your place to judge them and it certainly isn't right on your part to make a person seem bad if they are not. I thought of you to be a great person although we come from different walks of life. You ask questions that are real and informative. Those kind of questions can and will help others out one day. I don't think you should say that you are completely ashamed of being seen with anyone if you don't know them on the inside at all. All I hope is that whoever you are asking this question for has opened their mind to a whole new world.

Answer 5

Your question confused me.

A. How do u know he is pretending to be religious? Why isn't he performing all the rituals? Out of disbelief in Allah (swt) or just pure laziness and wishful thinking that he would be forgiven later on. Or is he as u called him "a hypocrite" he doesn't believe at all but is pretending in front of the society he lives in to gain access to it.

So many questions and needs to be answered.

B. Is this person a follower of a certain religion or an atheist?

You know my last answer would be neither, coz i am sure that friends have some of the highest influence on our lives. Besides, it is stated in Quran clearly that such people who believe in some of what Allah (swt) ordered us to do and reject or refuse the rest that does not suit their life are not to be called believers and Allah (swt would judge them. I think this fits both A. and B.

Answer 6

I'd go with "b" any time of day. He's the better person in my opinion. I do acknowledge that both are wrong.

In your question, you said does not want. that's as opposed to does not believe. That person is honest, strait forward, and will not tell you leis. That is very good! that's what makes a wonderful friend.

With person B you can tell him that he should pray, for example. You know whats wrong and work on it. With A you're in the dark.

I would befriend both.

Answer 7

i think you confused me because first i thought it's between one who don't pray and straight forward about it (so he must be a muslim not non believer!) and another one who is hypocrite, then i suspected you mean something else when you came up with the last phase, it appears to me you are making comparison with a hypocrite and a total non believer in God (infidel? atheist?)..
However, i ll try to answer your question; i appreciate sincerity very much, i won't take a hypocrite for a friend..

Answer 8

Asalam alaikum, the lowest level of the hell fire is for the hypocrite..that should tell us all something......another thing to remember, is we as muslims should veil our sins from our brothers/sisters, so that Allah(swt) may veil us from them on the day of judgement. Sooo what i mean is, better to at least appear pious on the street no matter what u do at home...but Not for the sake of getting positive attention and thus being a hypocrite...Allah knows best

Answer 9

actually its not that complicated . I think it would be better for you and less confusing if u try more to befriend people who r neither hypocrates or unreligiouse coz both of them are not(and believe me )NOT good friends

Answer 10

why would i have to be friends with either of them....are they my last options?there are no poeple in between?
if they were my last choice then i would say niether
BUT
i can be friends with the second guy so i can advice him if i detected a glimpse of hope in his heart.
hypocrates are big issue,they are by God's will in the base of hellfire,he's hurting himself and he'll hurt me by time.

Answer 11

"Never question the reality of what you fail to understand, for the world is filled with wonders..."

Frederick Beuchner
from The Sacred Journey