Should I be mad at my close friend?

Question

So i just met this girl like 2 months ago but we've gotten really close. She decided to hook me up with her best guy friend, whom at the time i didn't really know how close they were. Me and him started hooking up or whatever (which i don't usually do w/o a relationship but for some rediculous reason i did). Since the begining shes told me not to expect anything from him... but he proceeded to lead me to think he really liked me. Like an idiot i started like him and we have been hooking up now for a month. (Detail: I don't chase after him at all and he has no idea he i even like him) Today she decides to remind me that he doesn't want a relationship out of the blue.. weird. guess he told her to tell me? but yeah... i decided to stop talking to him, because i'm not going to hook up with no strings, i'm not like that. so she tells me "it's fine, he's a pimp he'll get over it. and dont get mad if he starts hooking up with me again." Wow, is this messed up or is it just me being sensitive?

Answer 1

I can tell by your lingo you're young and by the fact that your girlfriend told you he wasn't serious so you decided not to talk to him again.
Why wouldn't you ask him?
If you're still doing the he said, she said thing - quite possibly you aren't ready for these sexual encounters you are having?

Use protection whatever you do and maybe wait for a more committed relationship BEFORE you decide to do the wild thing with anyone.

Answer 2

Umm.. wow, she sounds rather "casual" about hooking up... She should have at least told you that the two of them had "a thing" before introducing you ..

Friends /w benefits is fine, but not when your other friends have had the same "relationship" with this guy.. and make sure HE knows and YOU know up front no strings, to keep the mind games away.

Answer 3

I had a friend who was cheating on his wife. He knew I'd out him, if I knew it, so he guarded it from me very carefully. I played the beard to some of his meetings with his secret gf UNWITTINGLY -- she'd ask me if I wanted to go see a movie. I was single and said "sure." And then she'd throw in "Can Bob come along too?" I'd say sure, and I thought it was all above board. Eventually, his wife found out he had been cheating. And even though I swear I knew nothing about it, she always had a problem with me after that, like I had been a party to the destruction of her relationship with her husband. I think I just brought it all back to her, so the only thing she could do was just sort of flush me, in her mind. I hated this, because I considered his wife a friend at one time. But I bet your friend sees you ALL as party to the end of their relationship. Not a lot you can do about that, sorry to say. It's emotional, not logical.

Answer 4

The whole situation is bad. Your friend is jealous and wants to start messing around with this dude again. They were obviously messing around before and she's upset because you trumped her. Now, you're in a loveless sham of a relationship just banging some random guy, and you're getting depressed about it. She is dealing with jealousy, you're dealing with rejection, so you guys are both saying things you don't mean right now. Just cut the dude out of the equation. Who means more to you? Your friend, or Mr. Playa?

Answer 5

Well im thinking that you put yourself i a bad position to begin with. I would just count this as a lesson learned and move on. You don't need friends like either one of them. What comes around will go around and catch both of em. Being mad at them will only hold you down more with anger...there's no point. Just know that with the two of them you will need to keep your guard up and list em as 'unpredictable'. Sorry it had to be you =(.

Answer 6

She sounds liek she has a pretty god damn cocky personality and looks down on you as not even close to the beautiful awesome attractive to men view she has for herself. sounds like she had someone else she had her eye on for awhile and he was her leftovers that she either dumped him for another guy to hook up with or they just used to be hookup buddies. either way, he's her leftovers and she's letting you "borrow him" and is expecting you to be grateful and not be surprised when he apparently "wants" her back. she probably got bored of the other guy and either labeled him as her backup or just decided to go back to him. she thinks that she's all that and can say whatever the hell she wants. she's wrong. tell her she's being a stuck up ***** and that as much as you love her (if you do) you don't want to deal with this and tell her to call you when she grows up.

Answer 7

It's pretty messed up. It looks like the two of them have something cooking and they both tried to play you. If it's any consolation, I think you handled yourself admirably and you shouldn't have any regrets but, the two of them are not trustworthy and you need to be careful with them. I would handle them with a long handled spoon and not even mention it to them how messed up it is that they did this to you. What they did to you really sucks and so do they.

Answer 8

I actually don't know what she is trying to say. Etiher he hooks up ith every girl or she is gonna hook up with him. Talk to her about it, and see what she really means. If it is fudged up, then yeah I would be mad at her.

Answer 9

she shouldn't have hooked u up with that guy in the first place if she known he was going to be like that

Answer 10

strange friend, go and talk to him yourself,tell him you like his company(i assume you do)and if he wants to hang round with you then thats ok, ask him if he wants more or just friends, don't let him or her play mind games with you, tell him straight and you only want yes or no answers, don't no and maybe aren't allowed. don't let either of them mess wih you. you can always walk away from them both and put it down to experience,depends if you want answers or not. good luck.