(I know this doesn't apply to everyone, but i've seen a lot of people like this and I never knew the in's and out's and it) Why, when guys get married, they figure their life is over. Why'd they get married in the first place? Girls seem to be more easy going about this but still. I'm not trying to be sexist or anything, I was just wondering from married point of views.
2007-09-28 05:45:14 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
To clear things up, this is not a problem of mine. I am not married. I saw this on a tv commercial and some older family members. Oh, and oral is not the answer to everything Smooth
2007-09-28 06:05:27 · update #1
I hope my husband doesn't think is life is over since we have been married!!!
2007-09-28 06:10:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been married for 26 years and I'm happy with that.
The "Ball and Chain" attitude that guys have stems from the simple fact that guys don't like being controlled or told what to do, and in a marriage there is a lot of compromising and things that you have to do. When you're only responsible to and for yourself you can make different decisions than if you have other responsibilities.
When you're single you can take more risks, both personally and financially. If you don't like your job you can quit. You don't have to worry what you look like or smell like or act like until you step out the door. When you're married you have to think of the other person before you act. You can't just do what you want, you have to stay within the bounds that your partner finds acceptable.
I think that you grow a lot more as a person if you do get married and go through all that and learn to take others into account on a constant basis. An eternally single guy is also kind of a spoiled and undisciplined kid in a way. Cute when he's young but pathetic when he gets older.
Yes, being married to my wife is for me restrictive in some ways, but she is not my ball and chain, she is my anchor. She is not my prison but my refuge, and the home of my heart.
outbackbob
2007-09-28 06:05:00 · answer #2 · answered by Duck! 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think, for some men, it's like an end to their sexuality so to speak. Perhaps this is a good thing - as when people are not married they tend not to take the relationship as serious as when they are.
Once you say your "I do's" (and rightfully so!) that should end any thoughts of straying.
I think women are more serious about monogamous relationships then men are anyway.
I do agree, if a man thinks their 'life is over' by getting married, he should move over and let a man more deserving marry that women. Every woman deserves better than that and shouldn't be made to feel that by tying the knot they are "ruining" their mans life.
I don't know? Good question!
I've been married for 1 yr after being with my husband for 10 and our relationship is WAY different (in a positive way) then it was when we were "common-law".
2007-09-28 06:00:34 · answer #3 · answered by purplefrog^murtle~tree 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because everyone have their own opinion about what marriage life is all about. if two person (in my opinion) don't have as lease 80 to 90% ideal about marriage it will be a hard and sometimes short lived one. some people change their mind after a couple of years of marriage to realizied it not what they thought it would be. some would see their marriage become moe one sided, there is a lot of hard work to make and keep a marriage happy and healthly (which most people don't understand), and the responsbitiies make more people feel their is over. basiclly they see the flash back of what their father/dad had to deal with when they're young kids. why did they get married in the first place. like any couples becauase they are in love.
2007-09-28 06:01:56 · answer #4 · answered by Thomas 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here are some ideas on the subject, since reasons for this behaviour is as diverse as the people who get married.
1.Routine of looking for a mate is obsolete. People get comfortable with routines and habits, such as going out with friends and checkin' out chicks. He may very well not be able to relate on any other level. (and got married too soon after meeting his bride)
2.Choices become limited. Excluding the freedom of choice of women (in a good looking man's case), but now he generally can't 'choose' to be spontaneous. Let's say, like not go home straight after work, maybe he'd like to stop off at a buddy's house to visit. Nope, can't do that, his wife relies on his presence (most likely in the case of having fatherhood responsibilities). Financial choices now become a couple choice, time choices, event choices...etc.
That's the jist of it. However, adult and mature men who get married do not have as many constraints getting married, only because they are already mature. Often, women are trying to get their young husbands to MATURE by helping (forcing) them to make better decisions with their money, time and activities.
2007-09-28 06:01:27 · answer #5 · answered by Xanadu 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People say the same things when having kids that their life is over. Why. it's only over if you make it over. I am happily married with a two year old. We still both go out with our friends, with each other, in large groups. we still have get togethers at our house, watch movies, etc..
It's stupid when people say their life is over. I still enjoy a lot in life and especially enjoy our son. you just do more compromising that's all.
2007-09-28 05:52:34 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like guys that are unhappy, and figure they just have to settle down.
When your happy and found the person you have fun with and enjoy your marriage life isn't over. I think most men understand that you can't sleep with many different women your whole life or whatever they consider advantages to being single. Unless they are unrealistic about their relationships, they shouldn't think life is over.
2007-09-28 05:50:38 · answer #7 · answered by jbahhh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not my attitude as a happily married man, however, I do believe many guys don't think it through enough before taking the plunge.
Thus, the concept of being with one person until they die suddenly slaps them in the face after the wedding....
There is also the drastic change in lifestyle that they perhaps did not think through: kids, house, bills, loss of friends, loss of being able to do what you want, when you want, etc.
2007-09-28 05:50:09 · answer #8 · answered by billtucker67 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some men view getting married or being in a committed relationship as losing their identity, while some women see marriage as creating theirs.
2007-09-28 05:49:51 · answer #9 · answered by Ms. GTO 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've always heard if a guy gets married he just dug up his own grave. Its because their friends (the guys friends) brag that are single that they can see who ever they want, and when your married you are with one person and only one person, and if your not, it will probably cost you a lot of money.
2007-09-28 05:49:42 · answer #10 · answered by Tommy's_Sweet_Girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well technically life "as they knew it" is over when they get married meaning the single life they knew is over...it is the same for women and when people have a baby or make any large adjustments in life.
2007-09-28 05:52:00 · answer #11 · answered by ~NIKKI~ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋