Me and my husband have been together for a long time, we have lived together for about 4 yrs and just got married this past June.
He usually goes down on me before so I can climax but I rarely return the favor. I don't feel that comfortable about it and I am not sure if he is that into it. He never asks me to do it for him, does he just not ask me because he knows I don't really like it? Does EVERY guy love that, or just some are more into it? Could he really not like it or just doesn't feel he needs it.
2007-09-28 04:48:35 · 41 answers · asked by It's a girl due 5/11/09 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Is your husband generally outspoken as to what he wants you to do in the bedroom? If so, he is probably not really that keen on you going down on him (there are quite a number of men who don't care very much for that). If he is really shy you might tell him (although it's a bit late after 4 years, but never too late) that you appreciate him never asking you to do something that you don't really like to do, and is there anything else you can do to make him happy?
2007-09-28 05:03:09 · answer #1 · answered by cyranonew 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he is deprived. If you receive oral regularly and enjoy it then why would you not want to return the favor. Did you ever think that maybe he doesn't really enjoy eating you out but instead enjoys pleasing you. He is comfortable enough and doesn't have any sexual hangups. he also does not badger you about oral(for which you should be grateful)
Listen every guy likes oral but it has to be done with detail and care. You are sensitive down there as well but you also know just because someones down there that doesn't mean the wheels are turning. COMMUNICATE with him and ask him what feels the best, and just as important what doesn't feel good.
Put aside your own sexual hangups. Be adventuress, and let your husband know what he has been missing.
2007-09-28 05:02:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is he deprived not getting oral? Yes, somewhat. However, it's not a life and death deal, that's for sure.
He never asks me to do it for him, does he just not ask me because he knows I don't really like it? There is a strong possibility that's the case. Assuming a minimal degree of sensitivity to your feelings, I think that's pretty considerate of him.
Does EVERY guy love that, or just some are more into it? As with all things that have to do with preferences, there are certainly people who like it more and others who don't like it as much. Practically all men at least like it, though. Given billions of men in the world, I would be silly to say that nobody dislikes it. You should ask him!
Could he really not like it or just doesn't feel he needs it? Probably the latter. Truth be told he does not NEED it. As long as you are otherwise keeping him sexually satisfied, it's probably not a big deal.
My question for you: What's your problem with it? What do you mean you don't feel comfortable? Since he goes down on you, there is clearly no oral sex taboo in your house, so it seems strange that you feel weird about it. Please allow me also to point out that human beings naturally feel uncomfortable doing unfamiliar things. I would assert that if you practiced and did it more, your discomfort would soon go away. Try it and see!
2007-09-28 04:59:57 · answer #3 · answered by Happy-2 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
My husband loves it but unfortunately for him until i have surgery on my mouth when the insurance kicks in i cannot give it to him and i feel so bad so i make up for it in other ways :) No guy NEEDS to get a bj and my husband is proof because it has been a year since he has had one but he still can't wait to get one and i can't wait to give him one again. I am sure one day you will enjoy doing it with some practice and time. I really don't know many women that enjoy it there first time. It is a real turn on just knowing how much you are pleasing your partner so just think of that and not focus on the fact that you do not like it.
2007-09-28 05:00:01 · answer #4 · answered by ~NIKKI~ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Alot of guys like this. It is a wonderful thing that he respects you enough to not put pressure on you to do it in return. I really believe that if he had a problem with it he would more than likely tell you. Just hang in there and pray about it. It's good that you have let him know that you do not prefer it as much as he does. Pray, Pray, Pray that this does not lead up to more serious things. Pornography, emotional abuse, etc. when this becomes not enough. I pray that he will have self control and enjoy what God blessed him with. When a man finds a wife he finds a good thing. Take care of your body, it is the only one you'll get.
2007-09-28 05:20:13 · answer #5 · answered by Monica 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you have made it clear to him either by body language or other ways that you really do not want to go down on him. I am sure he picked up on that. He just may not want to make you uncomfortable, but as a guy I can bet he would enjoy it if you initiated it w/o discussion. Do it a couple of times and see the results.
2007-09-28 05:33:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think most guys like it (?all) whether or not they know that, I'm not sure ;-)
I think you need to do what you're comfortable with... and LOTS of women aren't comfortable with it. No, I don't think he's deprived... but he is missing out on something fun. There are some good books you could read (He comes first) if you're interested in learning more about how to please him. Good for you to ask the question! Have fun.
2007-09-28 04:54:01 · answer #7 · answered by spiffy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your husband does this to you he probably would enjoy you doing it for him. If you truly love him then you should accept all of him the way he accepts all of you. You need to discuss the intimacy that you and your husband share together and ask him if it would please him more if you initiated it more often and see what he has to say. I am sure he does not want you to be uncomfortable doing anything sexual with him that is not pleasing to you. He is your husband and I am sure that he loves you very much and intimacy between a husband and wife is very important ...so go to him and ask him what his desires are and share yours ...it will only bring the two of you closer to enjoy one another to the fullest.
2007-09-28 06:10:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First why are you uncomfortable with it? Variety is spice of life. Speaking for myself I love it. It also increases the amount of time of foreplay. If you are sly then do it the same time (69).
I think you will feel more comfortable once you do it more. Also you don't have to take it all down ( like glorified porn) you can take in as much as you are comfortable with and happy. Even just licking as start might also excite him.
2007-09-28 05:01:53 · answer #9 · answered by ensoman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never liked giving oral sex either. But when you love somebody and you know that they likes something, you will do it to make them happy.
My significant other, like all men, likes to receive oral sex. He made it plain to me that he liked it and expected it, so I started doing it and discovered, to my joy and his pleasure, that I enjoyed it because 1 - he tasted different than any man I had ever been down on before (I think this is because he does not eat a lot of salt), and 2 - His "flow" isn't an abundance, and 3 - His penis is smaller than most men than I've been down on and is, therefore, easier for me to take in my mouth and doesn't choke me.
But, as I said, even if his penis was extremely large and his flow abundant I would still enjoy going down on him as I know it makes him happy and that's all I want to do: Make him happy.
He does not go down on me, however, so if your husband does and you enjoy it then you obviously know how good it feels and you should certainly show your appreciation by "returning the favor!"
Have fun!!!
2007-09-28 04:58:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋