this has been going on for about 8 years...long story short:she let my daughter fall into a pile of burning leaves causeing 3rd and 2nd degree burns/now scars. that was when my daughter was 15 months old! i didnt let the grandma see her for 2 years until my husband and i got back together and was kinda forced. so she always does stupid stuff that i fight with her about..smoking around the kids, taking them swimming without permission...then i found out a few weeks ago that she LOST our 4 year old son at wal-mart!! she didnt tell me, i heard it from him. then last weekend she let my daughter make brownies by herself and my daughter got ANOTHER 2nd degree burn right by the other scars. my husband agrees with me right now about her not being able to see them w/out one of us there, but he always gives in. how do i get him to realize that it isn't okay, even though it's his mom??
2007-09-27 19:24:15 · 13 answers · asked by bef 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
we have our own place!
2007-09-27 19:52:52 · update #1
CHIKSITA: wow, you must know my MIL!! my daughter was 15 MONTHS OLD!! her "granny" (45yrs. old) left her outside with the fire(that she actually lied at the hospital about-there was also insulation in there) while she went inside to answer the phone. all mt daughter could say was "mommo, ow!" she has big scars on her arms that she gets teased for and there is no surgery she can get yet to help it. my son is 4-not a 45year old that needs her own babysitter.
2007-09-27 19:57:46 · update #2
and..hell no i don't socialize with her!
2007-09-27 20:05:50 · update #3
i hav an almost 3 yrold an a 14 1/2 month old... they see my mum every weekend but my 3 yrold hasnt seen my partners mum since she was 12 mnths an my 14 mnth old has never meet her.. she aquesed me of being a bad mother coz i was letting her run around where we were sittin... but it was ok for her to drink amn smoke around her... i stoped her seein my kids for sayin i was unfit.. your mil caused you daughter to burn herself badly an your son got lost in a shoppin centre.. i told my partner that his mum will never see the girls again, mayb its time you giv your partner a choose you an the kids or his mum watchin them... your lil girl could of been killed... i cant understand though y an 45 yrold would leav a 15 mnth old out side on her own when there was a fire going.. stupidity stupidity stupidity
2007-09-27 22:24:38 · answer #1 · answered by angelz@princess265 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well if u have ur own place, what`s wrong with granny coming over to visit the kids as long as one parent is present. Likewise, either u or ur husband can take the kids to visit granny at her house. By now u both know she can`t be trusted alone with the children, so what is there to agonize over. Don`t stop her from seeing her grand-kids, just be there to supervise. Ur husband has had a wake up call, so he better get with the program. U better put ur foot down more firmly.
2007-09-28 03:28:13 · answer #2 · answered by flamingo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is your husband trying to get the kids killed? Ask him that directly... every time.
Sounds like the MIL is on drugs or something!
Your husband is AWOL if he lets his irresponsible flake of a mother take the kids anywhere. He needs to get a spine and cut the apron strings... or the umbilical cord!
If you have to socialize with the MIL, then get a babysitter and then go pick up the MIL and take her out to dinner... keep the flake away from the house and kids!
2007-09-28 02:32:53 · answer #3 · answered by revsuzanne 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Since the safety of your children is a stake you have to take serious measures. You and your husband need to set down with your mother-in-law and tell her the ground rules. Let her know you love her and you know she means well, but for now this is the way it has to be. Let her know that maybe over time she will become more responsible and you can relax the rules a little.
If your husband is not willing to do this then I would recommend you both see a counsler who can objectively help you work through this serious problem.
2007-09-28 02:34:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Tell ur husband , DO u want ur mother or children alive and safe???????????????
if u want ur mother GOOD for u , but be with her away from children, if he want his own flesh and blood, he need 2 talk to his mother , i hope she understand and tell him dont talk bad to her , cos she is his mother and she got none but him.
Also, try to fix her problems maybe, that way she can be little more caring , ORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
find her a bf if she dont have a husband or any , or if she got a husband, spice up there life so they can get distracted by it and leave ur children alone lol.
2007-09-28 02:48:59 · answer #5 · answered by michael 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think you're being a little harsh on Granny, don't cha think? First of all, it's not like she threw her grandchild into a pile of burning leaves, now is it? At 15 months, kids are tearing around all over the place and I can easily understand this happened. Why don't you guys teach your children to behave? A 4 year old boy should have enough sense to stay near Granny while at Wal-Mart's. My 18 month old granddaughter has more sense than that. And if you were my daughter or daughter-in-law, you'd have to fight me in court over whether I was capable of seeing them. You never mentioned Granny's age. She may becoming forgetful, as we all do with time, so show a little compassion. Just because your hubby didn't get Barbie's Dreamhouse or whatever when he was 8 years old does not make your mother-in-law Satan.
2007-09-28 02:38:52 · answer #6 · answered by Chiksita 4 · 0⤊ 6⤋
It's better to talk to your husband before any decision is made. You tell your husband that you want to move to another place for peace' sake and for the good of your children. It's better to have your own home without in-laws so that you can form your children in your own way. Please do in a polite way so that she will not be hurt.
2007-09-28 02:34:15 · answer #7 · answered by lui 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him straight forward that you fear for the saftey of your children when your MIL has them alone without you or him. Threaten to leave with the kids for their saftey if he doesn't want to take your concerns seriously.
2007-09-28 02:46:23 · answer #8 · answered by sweetgurl13069 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to bring a third party in-honestly-. If he doesn't start taking this seriously-something will eventually happen to one of youre children again,keep youre kids away from grandma until she starts acting and being responsible
2007-09-28 02:30:48 · answer #9 · answered by meena 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ask him..which do you choose? you mother who injure your children.. or your children who you bring into the world?
when he makes his choice.. then you will know what to do. sad to say. try some counseling if you think it is worth the effort. i know it is hard. you may have loved him FIRST, but we both know you love your children MORE. i trust you will make the right decision when he shows he can't. i hope your kids will be safe always!
.....additional thought, try order of protection or restraining order?
good luck..this situation is terrible and awkward.
2007-09-28 02:50:34 · answer #10 · answered by deleted 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋