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20 answers

Your poor kid! This happens to my daughter quite often, being the only girl left out of birthday parties. She is 9, and has some disabilities, but not obvious enough for the other kids to look out for her, they tend to overlook or even be spitefully nasty to her.
All I can suggest is not to harp on it with your child, who will get over it. Arrange to do something extra special on the day of the party if they remember and are upset that it is party day.
Yeah, you can check with the parents if there was an oversight, however its putting them in an awkward position if they weren't aware of classmates of their child.Perhaps your child has had a tiff with the inviter??
I think it hurts us parents more than them in the long term.
If it is a regular thing, you can also assume she is being left out at school too, and then speaking to the teacher is vital for proper social development.

2007-09-27 21:26:27 · answer #1 · answered by akdawswon 3 · 1 0

Well I don't know what the 'proper' thing to do would be, but if I was in your position, I would speak to the teacher of the class. It is rude to invite everyone except one child from a class to a birthday party, especially if the invited were given while the children were at school (or preschool). If you know the childs parents who are having the birthday party, I would say something to them. But you never know what they will say. And parents can be BRUTAL. Or it could of been a mix up and maybe your child just accidently didn't get an invite? I would speak to the teacher first and explain to the teacher how this makes your child feel.

2007-09-27 16:29:41 · answer #2 · answered by Nikki in PA 3 · 2 0

How terrible. I haven't gone through this, but I can't imagine excluding a child. Shame on the parents of the birthday child for allowing this! In most schools, kids aren't allowed to pass out invitations unless every child in the class is invited. Since someone obviously didn't think of the excluded children's feelings in this case, I say don't make a big deal out of the party. That day, do something extra special with your child. Does he/she have any friends who won't be attending the party? If so, invite a friend to go along with you. Also, speak to the teacher about how upset you are that invitations were allowed and/or talk about a birthday party to which not all the children were invited was allowed.

2007-09-27 16:29:05 · answer #3 · answered by SoBox 7 · 1 1

You have a couple of choices. You could play dumb and call the parent and say that your son's invitation never arrived and you are sure it was an oversight since it is your understanding that the whole class was invited. You could tell your child that sometimes people are just not nice. Or, you could tell him you are sorry he is sad and then do something nice with him that day. How does he know he's the only one? If the teacher allowed the invitations to be given out in class then it should have been all or none.

2007-09-27 16:30:13 · answer #4 · answered by EC Expert 6 · 4 0

We need a little more information, specifically how were the other children invited and how do you know your child was the ONLY child not invited?

Everyone is providing answers that are just a shot in the dark. After all, it's meaningless to contact the school if the invitations were sent via email, and calling the mom asking about lost invitations isn't much an option if the birthday child specifically told your child "I don't want you at my party".

The thing you don't want to do is assume the other parent was intentionally this mean... unless you've got reasons to believe she is would have reasons to act this way. After all, I remember back in grade school that every class usually had that odd kid no-one liked... is your child that odd one? If so, then you really want to try to learn why your child is the odd one and begin addressing that issue.

2007-09-27 17:28:44 · answer #5 · answered by HooKooDooKu 6 · 0 2

I'd try not to make a big deal about it. I wouldn't call the parents because you dont want them to invite him now and then exclude him at the party. I'd go buy my child a toy and some ice cream and have a mommy and me day and forget all about that. Think about it how many kids from your class is really going to show up at a kid party?

2007-09-28 15:09:32 · answer #6 · answered by cutenwild1769 5 · 0 0

That's a crass and cruel thing to do to a child. If a child has behavior problems, or if he's just not a class favorite, ask a parent to come along to help chaparone. Stuff like this sticks to a kid for years and eats away at his self-esteem.

I would be tempted to lie and say, no, you're not going to so and so's b-day because, don't you remember, Uncle Roy & Aunt Jean and the kids are all going to Six Flags, and we're going with them.

TX Mom

2007-10-01 14:44:40 · answer #7 · answered by TX Mom 7 · 0 0

I will tell my child not to be upset about it and I will take him out to the movies and show him a great time and afterwards I will ask him didn't he have a whole lot fun with daddy than he would of had at a silly birthday party

2007-09-27 16:34:38 · answer #8 · answered by Ben 1 · 1 0

Consider showing up anyways, there's a chance that a simple mistaked was made.

Otherwise, when your child has a birthday, invite the class, except for the student that didn't invite your child...

2007-09-27 17:34:49 · answer #9 · answered by sheik_sebir 4 · 0 1

This is the problem with sending party invitations to school. PLEASE do not call the party child's mother to see if it were an oversight...if it wasn't you will be embarassing her as well as yourself and will be intruding by inviting your son to a party he wasn't invited to in the first place. There are going to be more parties that he isn't going to be invited to later on in life as well...no sense making an issue out of this, just let it go.

2007-09-28 18:57:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

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